Re: Can't go on like this - I need to sleep!
I just wanted to chime in to say hang in there. I am a first time mom - age 43!!!! and I am NOT old - My DD is also almost 6 months old. She's an EBF baby, but I work full time so I nurse all morning, all evening and overnight (we co-sleep) and all weekend. My world pretty much revolves around nursing as she eats frequently when I am home. She gets my expressed milk in bottles during the day. But at night I am awakened as much as you are - every 2 hours - for those little feedings. I sometimes think oh, this would be SO much easier if I was a SAHM because I wouldn't have to worry about being 'on' at work. I work long, full days and when i walk in the door there's no downtime. My needs wait - whether changing my clothes, grabbing food, etc. Being a mom is hard. Sometimes MY 'I want to quit' Achilles heel is the 3X/day pump sessions - obstacles galore there. Work doesn't wait for pumping. Sonetimes you're on the go and theres no spot. Or you're eyeing the clock praying you won't be late for the next meeting. I have to use a huge heavy hospital grade pump w/no battery power so I lug that thing and a laptop - I bought a $45 power supply for my car so i can pump in a parking lot if all else fails! But the truth is the grass is always greener right? Being a SAHM is super HARD work (I remember from maternity leave!) You think you'll actually have balance in your life, but come 7P the house is a wreck, there's nothing to eat and you haven't showered, let alone exercised. And the next day...rinse, repeat. Feels like it never ends. And not feeling constant elation brings on guilt. My friends and I call it the perpetual mom dilemma.
Originally Posted by @llli*mammadiliv
I think that co-sleeping is what saves me. My husband is 100 percent on board. I sleep in a nursing tank and a lightweight hoodie so i don't need covers up to my neck. When DD wakes I just pull her on to my chest. Most times we have both passed out again within minutes. Sometimes she wakes again when she realizes her mouth is empty and she reaches again and again. I kid you not when I say I can do this in my sleep now and sometimes I'm not even sure how many times we wake up. That said, we've been co-sleeping since birth so we're well practiced. And i am still tired, trust me! Also when I was on leave if she fell asleep nursing I tried to crash with her sleeping on me. I needed the rest and the bonding time was unmatched.
My only other thought echoes that of the others. I remind myself my LO is only going to be this small and precious and dependent for a short time in her life. One day she may not want to be in the same room, especially when she becomes a teen and I'm - gulp - 56!!! Each month that passes I celebrate EBF because I know it's an achievement. In fact on her 6 month bday I plan to do a victory dance. Half a year! I can't wait. What an accomplishment. Our milk is the best nutrition money can't buy.
Please reach out anytime for a pep talk. This forum is a constant reminder you're never alone in any of this. In baby land there are rarely any problems that are solely yours.
1st time mom over 40 to Alex(andra) b: 7/14/12