Need help feeding 5 day old please!!!!!!!!!!! Stressing out

[@llli*still.here]

Okay, the main issue I see here is that she needs to be nursing more often. This could be part of the reason she is getting plugged ducts. It's not that baby isn't getting enough per feeding, it's that baby isn't feeding frequently enough. It is ABSOLUTELY NORMAL for a brand new baby to nurse 30 minutes and then want to nurse again 20 minutes after finishing a feeding- that makes almost an hour between feedings (since you time them from the beginning of one session to the beginning of the next), which is about average for a newborn- sometimes they'll go longer, sometimes shorter. As I said before, their tummies are tiny at this point and breastmilk digests very quickly, so try not to pay attention to the clock or how long it's been since the last feeding and if baby seems to want to nurse- nurse him. So just to be clear, that pattern you describe of nursing-sleeping-nursing again within the hour-TOTALLY NORMAL.

You are getting plenty of wet diapers, so that's great. As long as you're getting at least 5-6 per day your baby is getting enough milk, so keep that in mind as you cut back on the formula. It shouldn't be too difficult to eliminate that one feeding per day.

Also totally normal not to respond to the pump, especially in the beginning or if she is very engorged. The pump is NOT an indicator of what happens when the baby nurses because the mechanics are totally different. Don't think since you aren't getting much when pumping that baby isn't getting much when nursing.

Check the link I posted before about dealing with cracks, there are some great tips in there about how to treat them, how to nurse when you have them, and how to deal with it if they are too painful to nurse.

[@llli*maddieb]

Hi, how are things going today? I have read the thread and I am pretty sure the entire issue comes down to a not great latch. I agree with pp, I know it seems counterintuitive but I would suggest, nurse more often, and see an IBCLC asap. I suspect the issue is baby is not latching well, causing mom pain and making it difficult for baby to extract milk. This is very common and very, very fixable but the fastest way to fix it is with competent hands on help. You should be able to get that from a board certified lactation consultant. I suggest, get referrals if you can and talk to a few before hiring. (If you have free options in your area do that.) You want one experienced with helping mothers and babies with painful latch. The appt. should last about 90 minutes.

If you cannot see an ibclc for some reason, can't find one, or if you have and it has not helped, please let me know.

[@llli*Medic1]

Things have been improving slightly over the past few days. Only fed formula once in the past two days and that was due to trying to let the wife get a few consecutive hours of sleep.

Pain is down to just for the first few minutes at the start of feeding and then it passes. She's working on the cracked nipples but they are still causing a lot of pain.

Thanks for the tips on pumping. We have a Medela Pump in Style pump that we tried just the one time but we'll try some more and see if we can get the hang of it. Any tips on the pump are welcome.

[@llli*shelby.newman]

Thanks for the update, medic1! If her latch is good, once she gets past the cracked and sore nipples things will get a lot easier. Those first few weeks can be overwhelming, though! It's wonderful that she has such good support at home.

As someone who has never responded well to pumps, I can't offer much advice, but I know we have some pumping experts here who can help with your questions. Good luck!

[@llli*maddieb]

Is baby able to nurse and extract enough milk? That is what it sounds like. In that case, Pumping is not typically needed at this point, and uneeded pumping causes its own set of potential problems. Pumping tips depend on why and how often mom is pumping, which can change-so why, at this point, is mom pumping?

[@llli*Medic1]

Well we had a bit of a set back tonight..........

The cracked nipples have reached a breaking point (no pun intended). The pain has reached a level that she can no longer tolerate. At this point the whole end of the nipple is a big raw piece of skin. I have been really impressed at how long she held out and her pain tolerance in general up to this point. She normally won't deal with pain but has really been fighting through this hard. The really heart breaking thing is she really wants to keep breast feeding and feels like she is failing our daughter too. Watching her break down was about more than I could take. I reminded her that she can pump and still bottle feed for now and hopefully our daughter will go back to the breast once things get better.

So it's off to the pumping forum to see what I can learn to make this an easy transition.

[@llli*lovemygirlso1]

I know nipple shields are not recommended due to supply decrease but it would still be preferable to exclusive pumping. Have she tried one? What about Lanolin?

[@llli*Medic1]

She has tried just about everything. Earth Mama nipple butter, lanolin, I even got some Aquaphor. You know the nice thick stuff, kinda like Vaseline. I got that stuff since we have had such good luck with it on tattoos. She washes that stuff off before feeding though.

My mom recommended trying Burts Bees Hand repair and Vite E. We're really at our wits end on this one. It's stressing her to the point of tears and she had still tried to work through that but it was just too much.

[@llli*djs.mom]

Two things, 1st she should be TOPLESS all day long to increase airflow to her nipples while they heal. AND they have these things called Nipple Shells which you can buy when she has to put a bra and shirt on to leave the house. They care silicone and keep everything Off the nipple itself while still allowing air to circulate around the nipple. Which eliminates further irritation while they heal. But the FASTEST way to get cracked nipples to heal is be topless all day long. AND per many previous posters, if her pain and cracks is INCREASING as time goes on rather than decreasing than it probably IS a latch issue and you NEED to see a IBCLC. And I KNOW it can seem expensive. but honestly the cost of one good visit and a follow up is SO MUCH LESS than formula will cost you long term, I really really encourage you to invest in your child's long term health and your wife and child's breastfeeding relationship.

[@llli*maddieb]

I agree with djs mom. IS there any way your wife can see an IBCLC? Call your local LLL, your hcp, or see here for names: www.ilca.org
I strongly suggest, start calling TODAY. No need to wait for Monday. Breastfeeding helpers understand babies and moms need help on weekends to. If they are not available, leave a message.
And /or, can your wife call a local LLL Leader herself? I mean, you can do so, but I think she needs to talk this out with another experienced mom. As painful and scary as it is at the time, sore, cracked, injured, bleeding etc, nipples need not in any way mean that breastfeeding is not possible. MANY moms nurse right through WHILE GETTING HELP. If she cannot nurse then yes, FREQUENT pumping is the option. If she is not nursing AT ALL, then it is very important you guys rent a hospital grade pump and she pump 8-10 times a day. Personal use pumps like your Medela and meant to be used by moms who are pumping due to work- baby is over 6 weeks old, mom has already established good milk production, and is pumping 3 time a day or so at most. Untill you can get a rental pump, use the medela if baby is not nursing, of course. But be very careful the pump is not causing further injury, as that would defeat the purpose.

Even if you add up the costs of renting a pump and visits with an IBCLC, Formula costs more. WAY more, over all. And many places have free or low cost options.

This is a very salvageable situation but it would really help if you found competent local help. Please let us know if that is impossible for some reason.

Lanolin and those other products are just different types of barrier creams that faciliate healing by creating an environment for moist wound healing (allowing the bodies own oils to assist the healing process.) They are good for that, but none are going to fix the underlying problem of make nursing comfortable if baby has a poor latch. Lanolin is typically recommended for sore nipples because it is safe for baby and does not need to be washed off prior to nursing. It does not need to be thick, a thin, scant layer of warm and thus runny, purified lanolin usually works. Washing off barrier creams every time baby nurses is likely to irritate more. Whatever is used, it must be applied after every nursing or pumping session, shower, etc. It has to be on there to work.

Some IBCLCs also recommend coconut oil for painful nipples. But only Lanolin has actually been studied and found to be effective for this purpose.