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Thread: so many questions lost & confused about to give up

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Nov 2012
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    custer city, OK
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    Exclamation so many questions lost & confused about to give up

    I have a 9 day old little girl and trying to breast feed but do not know much and can't seem to find answers maybe ya'll can help me. My son was fed off the bottle but was breast milk (he was very preemie and spoiled to the bottle when he came home) so I do not know 1. what a proper latch looks/feels like 2. how to get her to nurse with out letting go and not wanting 2 latch back like 30 times 3. how can i get her 2 latch to my left breast and not just the right 4. how do i know if she is getting milk when she is suckling? she was born at 6 pounds 15 ounces as of monday she was 6 pounds 5 ounces. I am to the point that I am just going to pump or give her formula and that is so upsetting, distressing, and depressing to think of. My son is 2 years old and is very hyper child I do not think I would be able to pump her milk and feed her with out my son getting in to something. I really wanted to breast feed her and have that bonding time I didn't get with my son but I need help and can't find it. Please mommas any advice would appreciate it.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
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    COUGARTOWN Baby! From here on in!
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    Default Re: so many questions lost & confused about to give up

    This is a good instructional latch video. I think it really helps to see it.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VHs2Ql5Kylo

    Way too lazy for formula

  3. #3
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    Nov 2012
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    Default Re: so many questions lost & confused about to give up

    thank you 4 the video will watch it as soon as possible.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    May 2006
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    21,269

    Default Re: so many questions lost & confused about to give up

    Welcome to the forum and congratulations on the new baby!

    To answer your specific questions:
    1. It is less important what a latch looks like than what it feels like. A latch that looks good may not be good on the inside. But a latch can look wonky and still be a good latch. What separates a good and a poor latch is how it feels. A good latch will feel good when the baby nurses. You may have a few seconds, maybe as many as 30 seconds, of pain on initial latch, but as long as that pain does not persist throughout the feeding it's probably normal and should go away without you having to do anything.

    2. Latching and unlatching can be normal with such a young baby. The baby has to learn how to maintain her hold on the breast, andmake the connection between staying latched on and getting fed. If this is such a severe problem that it's impacting your ability to nurse, please see a lactation consultant, preferably an IBCLC, for some hands-on help. There's only so much we can do over the internet!

    3. This is another question that may take professional help in order to get a good answer. Try different positions. Try offering the less preferred breast first. Try offering it at the end of a feeding. If that fails, consider a nipple shield (but note that shields should be used with professional guidance).

    4. If baby has the appropriate number of wet and poopy diapers, she is getting milk. It can't come out if it didn't go in! Try listening for swallowing sounds when baby is nursing- often you'll hear a transition from baby going "suck-suck-suck" to "suck-swallow-breathe, suck-swallow-breathe".

    Don't panic, mama! You're not at the give-up point yet. And we'll be here to support you.
    Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
    Coolest thing my little girl sang recently: "I love dat one-two pupples!"

  5. #5
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    Default Re: so many questions lost & confused about to give up

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*themommaof2 View Post
    1. what a proper latch looks/feels like
    2. how to get her to nurse with out letting go and not wanting 2 latch back like 30 times
    3. how can i get her 2 latch to my left breast and not just the right
    4. how do i know if she is getting milk when she is suckling?
    she was born at 6 pounds 15 ounces as of monday she was 6 pounds 5 ounces. I am to the point that I am just going to pump or give her formula and that is so upsetting, distressing, and depressing to think of.
    1. Check out that video, but wide open mouth, good seal around the nipple, no clicking or popping noises usually indicate a decent latch

    2.Do you mean she latches on then pops off and relatches? Just keep trying. Remember, she's as new at this as you are so she's still trying to figure out how to do it, too. You might try squeezing a little milk out so it's already there to encourage her to stay on.

    3. If she seems to prefer the right you could try nursing her on the right first, so she's more relaxed, then shift her over to the left breast without flipping her over, if that makes sense. Just move her to the left and hold her like a football tucked under your arm. Sometimes that will fool them into thinking they are on the preferred breast.

    4.Can you hear her swallow? Do you see milk at the corners of her mouth? Is she having 5-6 wet diapers per day? If she's having the right number of diapers, you can be confident she is getting plenty of milk even if you can't tell if she's swallowing.

    5.It's normal to drop in weight a bit. Most of the time docs want to see them regain their birth weight by two weeks old. That's 14 days and you're almost there! This is not something to worry about unless baby isn't giving you enough diapers or seems dehydrated- lethargic, sunken soft spots, dark circles under the eyes.

    You can do this, mama. It's tough in the beginning because it's hard to know if you're doing it right. We've all been there. But it gets better as you gain confidence in yourself and in your baby. Just keep working at it. Try to find some activities your older son can do where you can sit with your baby for long periods of time. I know for me, it meant letting my older daughter watch tv way more than I would have liked, but it's temporary.
    “We are not put on earth for ourselves, but are placed here for each other. If you are there always for others, then in time of need, someone will be there for you.”
    --Anonymous

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