For some reason the past two weeks or so, it's really started to irritate me. A few weeks ago she was hitting and kicking me a lot while she nursed. That has mostly calmed down, but she's sort of tickling and flicking and scratching me with her fingers while she nurses. I can occupy her top hand while she nurses, but i can't do anything about her bottom hand.
I know it sounds like a small thing, but it's sort of like chinese water torture to me.
In general, I'm starting to find breastfeeding really frustrating. Part of me wonders if it's this that's annoying or if it's breastfeeding in general but I'm focusing on this one thing for some reason. I'm starting to dread nursing at all.
My daughter's only 6 months old. I'd planned to breastfeed for at least a year and assumed I'd have no problem getting to that. But for some reason, now I feel like I just don't know if I can make it. Breastfeeding makes me feel, I don't know how to put this--objectified in a weird way, like i'm just a pair of boobs, or just a food delivery system. I feel self-conscious about my body, I feel uncomfortable with my body and the way my breasts look (and I never liked them before this either) and this is not helping either my mood or my sex life.
Sorry, I realize this post is kind of all over the place. I'm trying to collect my thoughts into something that makes sense, but I know I'm not coming across well. I don't want to stop BFing, but I need to turn this into a more positive experience if I'm going to continue for very long.
Does this happen to anyone else? Does anyone have any tips for getting my daughter to stop fidgeting with my breasts while she eats (that would make me a lot more sane). is there any way to get the positive back?