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Thread: Really bad nursing behaviour

  1. #21
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
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    COUGARTOWN Baby! From here on in!
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    17,376

    Default Re: Really bad nursing behaviour

    Biting is really hard because it's a trust issue. In a very intimate relationship. But it's not reasonable to expect him to learn in one day. If you are being firm and consistent he will get it. I agree that some support from Dr Newman is always good. but also some patience. I dealt with biting and it wasn't an over night thing. And things needed to be readjusted every time my son got new teeth. Because he didn't know what to do with them if they weren't there the week before.
    He did get it. And your baby will too. Perhaps some infliction of emotion on your part would help. I know I think it really helped my son know things weren't OK because he could tell I was upset. I couldn't keep that from him when he bit me. I was also anticipatory about it. Always ready to unlatch.

    Way too lazy for formula

  2. #22
    Join Date
    May 2006
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    19,913

    Default Re: Really bad nursing behaviour

    He's not going to make the connection in just one day. Just be persistent. Bite = put down. Come back a couple minutes later and try again.
    Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
    Coolest thing my little girl sang recently: "I love dat one-two pupples!"

  3. #23
    Join Date
    May 2012
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    164

    Default Re: Really bad nursing behaviour

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*mommal View Post
    He's not going to make the connection in just one day.
    Yes, I do know it will take longer than a day to break the habit of biting. I am just feeling anxious because he ate very poorly today, really next to nothing. We were hospitalized for 2 days the first week after he was born because he didn't eat enough, so I've always been very anxious about how much he consumes and any changes in nursing patterns. It's part of my mommy baggage.

    Jack Newman responded incredibly quickly...he said, unequivocally, that biting = low supply and told me to get on domperidone.

    A UK Breastfeeding helpline, staffed by "qualified breastfeeding counselors" told me he was weaning.

    My local LLL leader thought it sounded more like a behavioural problem to do with the attention he was getting from biting.

    So, basically, it could be any number of things! (Though, I reject the idea he is weaning at 10 months). As long as I can get some milk in him, I feel newly resolved to keep going. It may mean more night nursing for awhile, which sucks, but this is not how our breastfeeding relationship is going to end.

  4. #24
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
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    middle of IA
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    Default Re: Really bad nursing behaviour

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*evolvingmama View Post
    As long as I can get some milk in him, I feel newly resolved to keep going. It may mean more night nursing for awhile, which sucks, but this is not how our breastfeeding relationship is going to end.
    that's the attitude! you are doing awesome for sticking wiht this. keep us posted. what a difficult time.
    DS1 6/7/11
    DS2 10/29/13

    Nursing, pumping, cloth-diapering, babywearing, working professor mama with the awesomest SAHD ever.

  5. #25
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
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    California
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    418

    Default Re: Really bad nursing behaviour

    So sorry you're struggling, but good for you that you're determined and working to find a solution. Just thought I'd throw this out there in case it might help--squeezing baby's butt cheeks together when they bite is supposed to elicit some sort of reflex that makes them let go. It works in newborns, anyway. Don't know about a ten month old. It's an old trick that was passed down to my mother from an older lady who used to watch me when I was a baby, and then from my mother to me. Hope maybe it can help you, or that something helps anyway. Good luck!
    First-time mama to Joshua, 10/29/11. 29 months and going strong! for 14 months; now finished with pump weaning!

  6. #26
    Join Date
    May 2012
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    164

    Default Re: Really bad nursing behaviour

    Well, mamas, thanks so much for all your help. It's been two days and we are back on the breast -- seems like the strike was short lived (thank heavens).

    I decided, after taking in all the advice, that I felt the biting problem was most likely to do with my reaction and my LO's growing independence. And, I suspect the strike had something to do with some kind of power struggle. After speaking with my LLL leader, I decided to take a somewhat different approach to the biting response. Instead of saying "no" and putting him down (which, seeing as this never elicited ANY response, she suggested he may still like as it is attention), I just put him down without saying anything, made no eye contact, and carried on with something myself. I decided, too, to give him loads of attention before the feed, and of course to praise the heck out of him when he did it well.

    The first feed I tried, he bit me immediately. I set him down and didn't say or do anything and he was SO upset. It was horrible. We tried several times (with a short break of no attention), repeating the process a number of times before abandoning the feed altogether and my husband giving him a bottle. It was horrible.

    He nursed a ton that night -- probably to make up for the strike.

    Since Monday, I've been trying to give lots of attention before the feed. I make sure there is nothing distracting me during the feed and pat him, stroke him, look at him and coo to him. Whenever he breaks the latch, I praise, praise, praise (he has already started coming off and clapping on his own!). He's a really active baby, so while I am all about feeding on demand, I have (for the past few months) been offering the breast every couple of hours (or less) because he just gets so into things that he doesn't "ask." Well, now I am waiting until he asks--giving him the power to decide when he feeds. Surprisingly (or not) he is still getting 5-6 feeds in during the day -- maybe it will mean a little more night nursing (or not), but I'm okay with that. I'm also going back to basics and making sure that his chin isn't tucked down (heard this can lead to more biting) and making sure he has a big chunk of the boob in his mouth (back to the newborn ways of pretty much shoving it in). And, of course, being hypervigilant about when he might bite.

    He bit me 3 times today and once yesterday, so we are by no means beyond the biting stage, but I think we are moving in the right direction. I even got him to nurse in our living room which hasn't happened in MONTHS.

    Anyway, don't know which of my strategies (or if any) are responsible for the pleasant changes, but I'm going to carry on, cautiously optimistic (I'd be lying though if I said I wasn't really apprehensive every time he latches on and whenever he moves into the comfort suck...).

    He's still twisting my nipple and it still drives me nuts, but after the strike I'm just happy to have him eating again, so will tackle that problem later.

    Thanks again for the support and ideas. And, sorry this is so long--I just thought it might be helpful to share what we are trying in case anyone else is having a similar problem.

    Cheers!

  7. #27
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
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    middle of IA
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    1,885

    Default Re: Really bad nursing behaviour

    awesome!!! this is really great to hear. keep us posted on your progress!
    DS1 6/7/11
    DS2 10/29/13

    Nursing, pumping, cloth-diapering, babywearing, working professor mama with the awesomest SAHD ever.

  8. #28
    Join Date
    Dec 2011
    Posts
    291

    Default Re: Really bad nursing behaviour

    I'm thrilled to hear you've been successful so far.

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