Giving up

[@llli*camrynsmom]

I have talked to my Dr, and she prescribed my normal medications again. They have been sitting on the bathroom counter for 3 weeks. I don't know what to do, because as soon as I take the first pill she can no longer have my milk.

[@llli*blue2000]

I'm very worried about you. I can feel through your posts how painful life is for you and I'm worried that things will not get better on your current course. My heart aches for the dilemma you are facing, and I understand your deep and strong desires to breast feed your baby. But you as a mother are not just the breast milk you provide, and I'm very concerned that things will get worse for you before they get better. She needs you, and you to be a healthy self. And there may be no other way for you to get there than to take those meds. With depression, as I know you know, part of the horrible disease is feeling hopeless and seeing no way out of situations. Please take care of yourself.

[@llli*alilwest]

I'm so sorry you're going through this. After I had my daughter i went through a horrible depression which required me to stop nursing due to the meds I chose to take. Sometimes what's best for your child is taking care of yourself. I have no training in PPD but i would think at this point it would be most beneficial for your baby to have a present and happy mommy. I also know what it's like longing for that ideal nursing relationship, as neither of mine have been ideal. Far from it. And it isnt fair. Only you know what's best for you and your family. I couldnt handle feeling out of control and for me the best option was meds. I know depression runs in my family, as it frequently does, and I had to keep telling myself that I came by it honestly. I wasn't flawed then just as you aren't now. You have a different set of circumstances and have to weigh your options based on those circumstances. We're lucky that we live in a time where we have options outside of breast feeding to feed our children. My IBCLC said she thinks formula is a tool available to moms when challenges/ variables arise that interfere with breast feeding. I think she's right.

[@llli*djs.mom]

EAT Mama! You have to eat!

[@llli*mtmama]

hey mama. well really if you need medication you need medication. you need to take care of yourself.

there are a variety of anti-depressants that are compatable with breastfeeding.

infant risk is a great number to call when you need to know if meds are ok when bf, i use them whenever i am unsure. http://www.infantrisk.com/

the following link is a good site with a phone number to call. they can help you. give them a call now. http://www.postpartum.net/Default.aspx

[@llli*camrynsmom]

I've decided to stop attemping to breastfeed, and I am continuing to pump (currently have pressure blisters on both nipples, super painful). She has yet to have a drop of formula, and the depression medications are still sitting on the counter. I just can't talk myself into stopping. I'm aware of the PPD, and the need for my treatment. But I can't stop, I would feel like a complete failure.

With the eating, I've always had issues. I was anorexic for 4 years, and when I got pregnant I had a BMI of 17.1.

My medication is NOT approved. I was taking pre-pregnancy, and am currently prescribed lithium. And not a small dose..

[@llli*mtmama]

call the number from the link above. you can take meds and provide your baby with bm. theres no reason you cant do both.

[@llli*camrynsmom]

Here is one of the information pages on lithium and breastfeeding. My dosage is 2x higher than most are prescribed.

http://www.drugs.com/pregnancy/lithium.html

Edited. I called the number and my Doctor, both stated my dosage for that drug is not safe for BFing.

[@llli*mtmama]

ok, so there are other drug options that are compatible. from some quick reading i saw zoloft and lexapro. you would need to speak with your dr about options.

maybe that is the best drug for you, i dont know. you need to talk to your dr about that and the other options that exist. if you dont breastfeed you dont. you need to be healthy to take care of yourself and your baby.

reach out for help mama.

[@llli*camrynsmom]

I've been on lexapro, zoloft, abilify, paxil, and prozac... none of them worked. When I tried paxil I had a horrible reaction and had suicidal thoughts and was dizzy non-stop.

So the only drug that has ever helped was the lithium, which I took for 5 years before I got pregnant.