Hang in there, post your feeling here we are here for you!
Hang in there, post your feeling here we are here for you!
Mommy to Maxwell 10-9-07 weaned with love (a party and a remote control monster truck) on his 4th birthday
My Boy 3-16-10
And my sweet pea Sam 2-12-11
Watch Your Language
I just wanted to chime in and say that eating every two hours is NORMAL and I'd be kinda worried if your 2.5 week old was going longer than that except during maybe one block of time a day. Also while I am sure there are many reasons to mourn not having a partner, this isn't one of them. Often men feel usless and frustrated during this beginning time because there is seriously nothing they can do to help in terms of feeding. They don't have boobs, the baby doesn't recognize their smell yet AND it's NOT recommended that you introduce any artificial nipples before the 4-6week point. SO even those of us who are married spent the 1st 4-6weeks in our PJ on the couch nursing our baby all day and all night. Don't worry about anything else. THIS is your job right now. Feed the baby. Everything else has to wait. You are working to regulate your supply. That is all that should be focused on. Get up, find a place in the house you are going to be comfortable and PLAN to be there all day. Set up your station. Bring phones, remotes, your lap top, movies whatever and PLAN to be there all day. Seriously. I got up to pee, change diapers and get myself more food. That's it. I didn't pump a bottle for My DH to give my kid until after 5 weeks. Incidentally that is also when I attempted to leave the house for the 1st time. So....you are right where you should be.
Also. DO NOT try to do a bunch of stuff when the baby is sleeping for an hour during the day. REST when your baby sleeps. Sleep as you know it and expect it is over. Your sleep will be broken like your childs from now on. So don't rush around trying to do stuff all day expecting to get a long stretch of sleep at night. It's Save your strength. Rest during the day. Because you are going to be up several times during the night. It will all get better with time. But for the next 4 weeks at least, settle in.
Way too lazy for formula
Hi mama. Sorry you're having a rough time. You're getting good advice here, and I agree with what everyone has said about the frequent feeding being normal, etc. I wanted to speak just to your concern about taking medication for depression. I was concerned about this when I first got pregnant, because I've been on Prozac for years. Whenever I go off, I get depressed again and it just doesn't go well, so after talking to my OB and my therapist I decided to stay on it through my pregnancy. He was born perfectly healthy, 7lbs 3oz, and went home with me the next day. I have continued taking Prozac while breastfeeding, with the blessing of both my OB and my son's pediatrician. (There are other antidepressants besides Prozac that are even safer for breastfeeding because they don't get into the milk at all, but I didn't know that when my son was born so I stayed on Prozac and he has been absolutely fine. No effects whatsoever). My son is now a very happy, very healthy 10 month old. Nearly 21 pounds, growing beautifully, and developmentally ahead of schedule. And his Mommy is happy too, which enables me to be the best mommy I can to him. Don't be too scared to take the meds if you need them. Unlike me, for you it will probably be temporary. There are safe meds out there that won't affect your baby. (You can call InfantRisk to find out more about different antidepressants--website is www.infantrisk.com and there is a phone number for a hotline there where you can talk with a specially trained nurse who will answer your questions about medications and breastfeeding). Your baby needs a loving, engaged, not-depressed mommy! If it takes meds to get there, so be it. It's nothing to be ashamed of.
First-time mama to Joshua, 10/29/11. 25 months and going strong! for 14 months; now finished with pump weaning!
hang in there, mama! The first 2 months are definitely rough. Don't be.afraid to take medication if you need to. I did for several months and had to switch types twice to find what worked best for me. My son never had any ill effects from it. Also try to eat as healthy as possible and speak with your doctor about vitamin supplements such as b-vitamins to help with energy. For now sit outside with lo and soak up the sun. It'll make you feel better and help regulate her day/night rhythms. Start taking walks with lo in a sling or stroller whenever you feel healed enough/have doc's ok.
I agree with the PP who said to set up "nursing stations" in your home. Being prepared with some water, a snack, the remote, your laptop or smartphone.... Everything you need so that once you settle in to nurse, it's all there. It really helps you to relax rather than being irritated that you don't have XYZ but you can't get it.
I know the advice is to 'sleep when baby naps'. But I also found that to kind of bug me because sometime, I need ME time. So I would plan on at least 1 nap a day. "Next nap, I'll nap too." That one nap did wonders for me and my mental state.
You haven't mentioned if you're cosleeping or not. I have slept with all of my girls (still do with #3). Although getting the hang of laying down and side nursing takes time, it's SO WORTH THE EFFORT! You get to sleepily nurse and still get some rest. It is exhausting to get up every time. Rolling over to nurse allows you to only half wake / half sleep.
It sounds like you're doing a wonderful job. Also know that you're coming into growth spurt time were she'll cluster feed. It helps to know that it's normal. Breast feeding really does get easier. Your milk is always there, ready, the right temperature and convenient! Not to mention free! Once you get over the hump of the first few weeks, you'll be so thankful you stuck with it. So will your baby!
Keep talking to your councilor. Having the lines of communication open will be such a great help.
Mommy to our DD1 early bird (34 weeks, 2 days, 7lbs, 14oz)! Oct. 2nd, 2008 Emergency C-Section, Frank Breech, HEALTHY Girl!
Weaned @ 17 months
Our DD2 early bird (37 weeks, 3 days, 7lbs, 12oz) Aug. 10th, 2010 Our Successful VBAC, growing like a bad weed!
Weaned @ 15 months
Our DD3 early bird (37 weeks, 3 days, 7lbs, 6oz) Feb. 16th, 2012 Our 2nd VBAC and lightening speedy birth!
Loving being a Mom of 3, 40 months apart!!
FTR I didn't say Sleep when the baby sleeps. Because I know most new moms have a hard time with the concept. I said REST when the baby sleeps. It's different. It's different than trying to sleep when you haven't yet learned how to nap. But if you sit with your feet up or lay down all snuggled up with the baby and a book or magazine, it's still RESTING and better for your overall health than running around trying to do dishes or clean. Your BODY needs the rest and is going to be keeping very different hour than it's used to. So you should rest even when you can't yet sleep. It takes most moms until about 3-4 months in to actually learn to nap with their babies and understand how important it can be. So for now, just REST whenever the baby is sleeping in anticipation of being up mulitiple times during the night.
Way too lazy for formula
Aw, I just wanted to say, it IS hard at first. I found that no one really told me what to expect, and then it was a shock to find that I never got to sleep for more than 2 hours at a time for months, and that my days would be spent nursing, eating (when possible), changing diapers, going to the bathroom quickly while the baby cried, and almost nothing else. But life does eventually return to a semblance of normal! People have given great advice, and if I could second one thing, it would be to learn to nurse lying down. And co-sleep if you are comfortable with it. You get sooo much more sleep if you can sleep WHILE baby nurses. Good luck to you!!!
Oh Mama, you're doing a great job!
I especially love sherice's post. Please do go back and re-read it. That advice is golden.
The early days are such a game changer. Like you, I was exhausted and fed up! I remember cursing breastfeeding and marveling at how anyone could be foolish enough to think it was enjoyable. Then we got into a rhythm. In doing research, I learned that babies will often feed 24/7 in the early months. Once I wrapped my head around that reality, I was able to embrace breastfeeding my own way and really enjoy it! I think breastfeeding success and satisfaction is largely internal and about positive self-talk.
When you're scraping by on 3 hours of sleep in a day, it's easy to slip into negative thoughts. Djsmom makes a valuable point about learning to nap. Having a baby really does involve retraining yourself to sleep in short bursts. The sooner you can find a sleep arrangement that allows this--my solution was side-lying cosleeping--the sooner you'll start feeling like "you". A productive day for a new mother might involve showering and eating 3 nutritious meals. If you manage to dry your hair, you're officially super woman.
It gets easier. Call on your friends to swing by with frozen meals. Have someone drop off a stack of good books. A favorite treat of mine when I'd nurse sitting up was to fill a basin with hot water, scented oil, and Epsom salts and soak my feet. It's cheap, relaxing, feels indulgent.
My son just woke up for the 4th time in 4 hours...and it's only midnight!! Looks like we're in this together tonight!
Last edited by @llli*alphawoman; September 13th, 2012 at 10:16 PM.