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Thread: Evening struggles with sleep

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Oct 2011

    Default Evening struggles with sleep

    My 11-month daughter has recently rejected all pacifiers (she is ADAMANT about it!) which is making going to bed at night extremely challenging: every brief awakening turns into a full-on freak out.

    We used to co-sleep from her first wake-up, but now her first wake-up is 30 minutes after I put her down and unlike before, where she would often re-settle herself with a pacifier or with minimal rocking, she won't let me leave her either in our bed or move her to the crib. My only option seems to be to go to bed with her 30 minutes after her bedtime (which is when she wakes up for the first time). This is wrecking havoc on my evenings and making me (and my husband) miserable. We don't have time to talk to each other anymore.

    I've tried Pantley's pull-off method, but it's a total bust (she just cries). I've tried CIO, but I couldn't go through with it after the first 10 minutes and it still haunts me: listening to my baby desperately wail is just not for me. Jay Gordon's method seems similar to Pantley's idea and I just don't see how it's going to work. My DD is a very stubborn baby, she would cry and cry and cry until she gets what she wants (the boob).

    Any advice? I know babies grow, mature, and this is just a phase, but she is soon a toddler and I've seen no improvement in her sleep (in fact since the pacifier rejection things have gotten worse!). I feel stuck

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Nov 2010

    Default Re: Evening struggles with sleep

    Could this be teething? You could try advil and see if that helps. Also could she be needing to drop a daytime nap? I think we were down to two at that point.
    Can't believe I've been and a full-time SAHM to Elena (5/2010) for over 2 yrs!
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  3. #3

    Default Re: Evening struggles with sleep

    Sounds like you have a smart little girl on your hands.

    Are you trying to nightwean? Can you nurse her once back to sleep and see how she does after that? Nursing at night can be important to some babies since they can be so busy during the day or just wish to reconnect (though if it's impacting your sleep I can see how that's a problem).

    Sleep battles can easily become wars. One of the reasons why we bed-share until our LOs are older. I tried CIO with my first (who was a smart one like your DD and fought sleep tooth/nail) and regret it very much (plus it didn't work!).

    Follow your heart and pick your battles carefully.
    Punk-rock luvin mate to DH and mama to DD1 (born '03) , DD2 (born '08) and nursling DS (born '11) who survived infant botulism.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Oct 2011

    Default Re: Evening struggles with sleep

    Thank you for advice.

    I have been doing a lot of thinking and realized that we've been putting our LO to sleep too late (she is down to 2 naps a day at this point).

    We put her down at 8pm last night and while she still woke up almost hourly after midnight, she slept much better in the evening, giving me and DH some badly needed alone adult time.

    I've decided to try and follow Pantely's pull-off method more persistently, really make sure we have a consistent bedtime routine (at the same time each day) and then reevaluate in a few weeks.

    CIO is not for us, but we are gonna keep trying.

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