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Thread: Help with night weaning

  1. #1

    Default Help with night weaning

    I am having a rough time with my 15 month old. He is up nursing 5+ times every night since he was born. I have finally decided to night wean him and it's breaking my heart. Now I don't know what to do-continue like it is or just night wean him? I really want to stop night nursing him because of the toll it's taking on me and my husband's sleep and we both work full time jobs plus the toll it's taking on our love life. But when I hear him crying at night to nurse it just breaks my heart. I still want to nurse him before bed (probably think milk supply will significantly decrease) Has anyone been in this situation, does it get better? Need advice, thanks so much!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
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    6,562

    Default Re: Help with night weaning

    Have you tried cosleeping with him?

    I didn't night wean my first until she was 20 months, and then it was gradual - we took three months to fully night wean her. She was more ready at that age. My second is 19 months right now, and frankly, I don't have any plans to night-wean her.

    You can schedule in time for the hubby right after the baby goes to sleep.
    Tracie

    Mommy to
    Lilah 10/08 nursed 25 months
    Beatrix 01/11 nursed 30 months

  3. #3

    Default Re: Help with night weaning

    That's what I am doing now-co-sleeping with him. He is still up all the time. Last night was my first night trying to wean him-husband consoled him when he woke up. I am sleeping in another room. My plans are to night wean him first and then put him in his crib. I really just want my bed back and my husband. I really do feel guilty though!

  4. #4
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    Default Re: Help with night weaning

    Dr. Jay Gordon has a really good method. It's what I used, though I didn't follow his timeline strictly. I know this method has worked for a lot of mamas here. It's designed for co-sleepers, but works for separate beds, too.
    “We are not put on earth for ourselves, but are placed here for each other. If you are there always for others, then in time of need, someone will be there for you.”
    --Anonymous

  5. #5
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    Default Re: Help with night weaning

    http://drjaygordon.com/attachment/sleeppattern.html

    Have you thought about putting the crib mattress on the floor in his room? I'm not criticizing what you're doing, please don't take it that way, just throwing ideas out there. When Lilah was 14 months old I put a twin mattress on the floor in her room and I would nurse her down on that and then join her after she woke up the first time. We actually bought her a full size bed when she was 16 months old. We started night-weaning at 20 months when I was pregnant, with my husband doing bedtime. She had been waking 4 to 6 times a night since she was around 9 months old and then started sleeping a 6 hour stretch starting at bedtime when she got used to him putting her to sleep. Then he took over the entire night about 3 months later and she was fine with it.

    Beatrix is 19 months old and she wakes 3 to 5 times a night, I think. I nurse her down in her bed (queen size) and then join her after her first waking. I work too, and I get how tiring it can be to wake up multiple times a night. A lot of us have been there.
    Tracie

    Mommy to
    Lilah 10/08 nursed 25 months
    Beatrix 01/11 nursed 30 months

  6. #6

    Default Re: Help with night weaning

    I appreciate the ideas. Yes I have thought about getting him a twin bed but I am scared of him falling out, do you just put the mattress on the floor? If so, then I would be scared he would just come in my room. He has never been in a crib before so I know he won't like it. I thought about moving the crib in my room after he is sleeping better. Maybe just do everything gradually??

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
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    Virginia
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    Default Re: Help with night weaning

    I am working on night weaning right now momma... it's tough. My LO isn't quite there yet. I am due with baby #2 the beginning of November, and I know I will not be able to handle 2 kids waking to nurse in the middle of the night. And DH and I haven't had a "night" in our bed since DS was born. If you start slowly, you may find your LO will do well with it. Or it may take time.

    We took mommy2lilah's advice, and DH started taking over bedtime. Since then, DS sleeps much better. I have taken him to bed since then on a couple of occassions, and those nights he woke more frequently and only allowed me to comfort him. What we do at night is when he wakes, DH tries to comfort him first - if he is not consolable after about 5 min then I will take over but try to console without nursing. I will nurse if nothing is helping. I will tell you that during teething nursing at night was a blessing for us. I can relate to the guilty feelings, I know my DS loves to nurse and would not be self-weaning right now. In my situation with another baby, I am just not sure I can handle tandem. We are taking it day by day and night by night.

    I can honestly say that DH taking DS to bed at night has been a huge releif on me. I have about an hour or so to myself before I go to bed if DH doesn't get back up - I never get time like that at the house!!
    FT working momma to a 9/11/10 busy boy and 11/13/12 happy little man.
    Also wife to hubs since 8/23/08, bonus momma to H (girl) -99 and G (boy)-03

  8. #8

    Default Re: Help with night weaning

    He is finally done teething and that's why I decided to start now. He only needs his two year molars now. I still want to nurse him to sleep so I don't know how that is going to work out, DH said it will confuse him but I really don't want to give up nursing all together, Good luck to you too!

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
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    251

    Default Re: Help with night weaning

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*brady11 View Post
    I still want to nurse him to sleep so I don't know how that is going to work out, DH said it will confuse him but I really don't want to give up nursing all together
    What about trying to transition to him nursing as part of bedtime, but not fully to sleep? That's what I started doing with my DD around this age. While it was initially harder, she is now able to go to sleep more independently and bedtimes are not as hard on me.

    I also want to mention what others have mentioned to me about night weaning: it's possible that your LO will still wake up just as frequently and you will have just taken a potent tool out of your toolbox for getting him back to sleep quickly.

    That's not what you want to hear, I know, but that has been some people's experience. My DD is about to turn 2 and in not night-weaned. That is just one of those things I fantasize about doing. You know: take a hiking tour of Ireland, own an apple orchard, night-wean my toddler. Ahhh...life would be a dream.
    -Hannah

    SAHM-WAHM to lovely Lizzie, born at home 9/14/2010


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