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Thread: Desperate! Need help with newborn!

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
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    Default Desperate! Need help with newborn!

    I've another post on here but have some specific questions so thought another post would be easier.

    I've been told to feed baby minimum every 2hrs, max 3hrs - he's lacking energy and is losing weight, takes supplement to try and boost him up - is this 2-3hrs necessary or could I wait for him to be really hungry so that he may have a good feed?

    Do I have to pump during the night (I've loads of milk so right now this isn't an issue) when I pump every 3hrs during the day? I'm severely lacking sleep!

    Should I stop carrying baby around so that he'll wake up more often and not feel so safe and comfy - he's sleeping too much and not feeding enough?

    also instead of pumping my milk as supplement, could I not put him on one breast while pumping the other? my milk pours when I pump one so it'd make it easier for him to drink.
    Last edited by @llli*mumofthree123; September 1st, 2012 at 05:07 AM.

  2. #2
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    May 2006
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    Default Re: Desperate! Need help with newborn!

    I'm sorry your little guy is giving you a hard time! Hopefully you'll quickly get him back on track.

    When a baby has issues with slow weight gain, it is much better to wake him frequently and have him take in small amounts than to wait for him to be really hungry and take in a larger amount. Small, frequent feedings are normal and ideal for young babies. This is because their tummies are tiny, and because breastmilk digests very rapidly. Think about it this way: if a baby takes in an oz every hour, that adds up to more milk than if he takes in 2 oz every 3 hours.

    Pumping during the night depends on what the baby is doing. Is he sleeping through the night, or is he waking at least every 3-4 hours to nurse? If baby is sleeping through, you want to wake him and nurse him. If you can't wake him, pump.

    If baby is sleeping too much, I would at least try putting him down and seeing if that makes a difference in the amount he asks to nurse.

    I'm a little confused about your final question. Do you mean that when you pump, the breast that isn't being pumped pours milk? If so, I would try using the pump to get a letdown to the baby, especially if he is so sleepy at the breast that he doesn't always stimulate a letdown on his own. But if you mean you'd like the nurse the baby only on one breast and then pump the other instead of nursing, I woldn't recommend it. Better to get the baby on there than the pump, and then pump in addition to feeding if you are having a supply problem. Which it sounds like you are not.
    Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
    Coolest thing my little girl sang recently: "I love dat one-two pupples!"

  3. #3
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    Apr 2008
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    Default Re: Desperate! Need help with newborn!

    with pp

    Are you timing your nursing sessions? Sometimes we are told by medical staff to nurse for a certain amount of time per breast but it's much (much!) better to allow baby to empty the first breast before starting on the second. Breastmilk has two types - foremilk that comes out at the beginning and is more of a thirst quencher and then hindmilk which flows after the foremilk and is FULL of fat and nutrients. You may even notice a slightly different colour as you're pumping (foremilk is more watery and hindmilk is more rich).

    Think of the first breast as dinner and the second as dessert (and dessert isn't always necessary - he may be full from dinner ) Ensuring that your lo is getting the fatty hindmilk may help with weight gain.
    ~Jenn~


    mother of 2 boys!
    08/14/98~~03/20/08

    Birth: 7lbs 12oz, 1 year: 22lbs 11oz
    until he self-weaned 4 days before his third birthday ... still on occasion ... and happily

    ************************************************** ************************************************** *****************
    People need to understand that when they're deciding between breastmilk and formula, they're not deciding between Coke and Pepsi.... They're choosing between a live, pure substance and a dead substance made with the cheapest oils available. ~Chele Marmet

  4. #4
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    Aug 2012
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    Default Re: Desperate! Need help with newborn!

    won't feeding hourly increase his colic?

    he doesn't manage to empty one breast so i usually pump both after a feed and he gets supplement - but rather than doing this i was thinking of pumping breast not used and he'd be put back on breast he was on after waking a bit - less sucking needed as it pours out when i pump. i'm freezing the pumped milk.

    i'm trying to get him on breast more but he sleeps so much.

  5. #5
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    Default Re: Desperate! Need help with newborn!

    feeding small frequent feeds will EASE his colic. get him on the breast as much as possible, as often as possible, particularly with the supplementing confusion he's having. if he'll nurse every hour, get him on every hour.

    i'm confused - if you have such oversupply/leaky letdown that milk pours from your nipple, then the problem isn't that he isn't stimulating a letdown. right? is he not swallowing the milk that's pouring into his mouth? i'm wondering if you can't just quit the problematic supplementing and let him nurse every hour at the breast?

    how much milk are you pumping after a nursing? i'm a little worried that you're going to get yourself a nasty case of oversupply. of course, feeding the baby right now, today, this week, is much more important than worrying about oversupply in the long run, which you can manage later - but maybe you can back off the pumping?
    DS1 6/7/11
    DS2 10/29/13

    Nursing, pumping, cloth-diapering, babywearing, working professor mama with the awesomest SAHD ever.

  6. #6
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    Default Re: Desperate! Need help with newborn!

    with Auderey. Frequent nursing sessions are the way to go with a baby who is colicky. (Also with babies who aren't.)

    I have the same questions that she does. Often we see moms overpumping, and we'd like to be sure you're doing the right amount.
    Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
    Coolest thing my little girl sang recently: "I love dat one-two pupples!"

  7. #7
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    Default Re: Desperate! Need help with newborn!

    what is oversupply?

    i'm freezing excess pumped milk. i'm pumping approx 65 - 100mls. should i pump breast used for feeding to make sure it gets empty after a feed? i really hate pumping and would love to not have to.

    he falls asleep when he reaches my breast. even with milk in his mouth sometimes he just lets it fall out. he's so sleepy. if i leave him for longer he seems to feed better.

  8. #8
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    Default Re: Desperate! Need help with newborn!

    Oversupply = making more milk than the baby needs. If oversupply is minor, it's generally not a problem. But if it's significant, it cqn cause the baby discomfort while he nurses and can contribute to things like plugged ducts and mastitis.

    Right now it sounds like your output is about right. (For all you non-metric ladies reading this post, 65-100 ml = around 2-3 oz). I would not pump the breast that has been nursed on unless you suddenly see a decrease in overall supply, and you find yourself having difficulty meeting your baby's needs.

    Excessively sleepy babies can be a real challenge. Techniques for waking a sleepy baby:
    - Dim the lights in the room where you nurse. Newborns sometimes close their eyes in response to bright lights.
    - Keep the baby cool; a cool baby is an alert baby. Strop baby down to a diaper or onesie when it's time to nurse, and keep a fan blowing in the room where you nurse (but not directly on the baby).
    - Annoy the baby; an annoyed baby is an alert baby. Tickle baby's feet, rub the soles of his feet or against the grain of his hair using your hand or a cool, damp washrag.
    - Try switch nursing. Many babies find the breast so soothing that they suck a few times and then doze off. With switch nursing, you aim to teach the baby that the breast is a place where you eat, not where you doze. So the moment baby's suckling has slowed and baby is nodding off, you remove him from the breast, burp him, change his díaper, and switch him to the opposite breast. You repeat the process as many times as necessary until the baby will no longer wake.
    Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
    Coolest thing my little girl sang recently: "I love dat one-two pupples!"

  9. #9
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    Jun 2009
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    Default Re: Desperate! Need help with newborn!

    Your situation as you describe it has me a little confused. Sometimes a real time back and forth conversation with a breastfeeding helper is more helpful than online communication. Don't get me wrong, the suggestions offered by pps are all good, but I almost get the feeling they are stabs in the dark, like we are missing some info-i am not suggesting at all that you are not telling us everything, just sometimes the right questions have to be asked. Have you seen a IBCLC or talked to a local LLL Leader?

    my questions are 1)why is your baby not gaining, as you seem to have plenty of milk? I understand he is sleepy, but, again, why so sleepy at this point? it's a bit unusual-is the latch poor, painful to you, shallow? how has output been?

    2) Why are you worried about 'colic?" A baby that is up for hours screaming is the typical colicky baby. but you say your baby is sleeping too much and cannot be awakened to nurse. That does not sound like colic. What is happening that is like colic?


    to answer your pumping ? I assume you are pumping in order to have breastmilk to supplement, not to increase supply? there is no reason to pump when there are no separations unless it is for one of those reasons.

    A two week old baby typically needs to nurse a minimum of 10-12 times a 24 hour day. minimum. more often is fine. but it need not be in a regular 2-3 hour pattern. Maybe baby is so sleepy because you are waking him on your scedule/the scedule you were told to adopt rather than letting him find his natural scedule.

    I would add to mommals list for keeping baby awake at the breast to try breast compressions.

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
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    Default Re: Desperate! Need help with newborn!

    I've had advice from the midwife to pump after each feed in order to have a supplement supply. However, yesterday something clicked! I hate pumping and why pump if I have the milk and baby can drink it - up to now he's been too sleepy to drink enough, which is why we were supplementing to ensure he got enough. Yesterday he began to be on my breast most of the day but actually drinking way more than the last 2wks. I also didn't stick to the routine that was given to me - to feed every 2-3hrs and to wake him up to feed. It just wasn't working so I decided to allow him to find his own routine and to have breast available for however long it took. Finally he's started to be more alert and actually feed rather than conking out automatically when put on boob.
    Up to now he at one stage forgot how to latch (due to supplement feeding) and we managed to relearn this, also then how to suck as he tended to wait for the milk to flow. Right now he latches on fine and has enough energy to suck. Though alot will spill right now as he doesn't seem to swallow sometimes. I don't mind this too much as long as he's actively feeding.

    Colic: every evening between 8-10pm he cries as if he's pains and sometimes goes absolutely hysterical. I was told to not feed unless 2hrs has passed as it can upset him if he doesn't get enough time to digest between feeds.

    He was feeding only 6 times in 24hrs and since yesterday this has increased to 8times - I'm hoping in the next few days it'll increase again. He actually woke for the first time by himself during the night for feeding! He only fed once during the night but at least he was active for it - up to now I've spent hours during the night trying to wake him up and it never worked as he never had a good feed. Should I allow him to continue to find his own rhythm for night feeds?

    I've started using breast compressions which does help alot. Thank you so much for all your advice. It's so far been a lifesaver!

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