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Thread: Is 6 months good enough?

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Apr 2012
    Location
    California
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    30

    Default Is 6 months good enough?

    Lo will be 6 months in a couple of weeks. Today while pumping, i noticed blood in my milk. I was bleeding and dont know why? I had a milk blister a few weeks ago, but im not sure if thats the cause. Ive been on this website evrynight since first discovering it back in Feb. Today when I saw the blood I thought to myself "maybe ive done my best" I have this idea of calling it good at 6 months. It hasnt been the easiest thing for us. Yes we struggled at the begining, but overcame it. I still have os and oald. He still fights me during most feedings. The mornings are really hard. He never wants to eat before i go to work. And its frustrating because i feel under pressure to.get him fed, so that its one less bottle he takes. We dont go out much for fear that he wont feed and cry and ill spray everywhere. I cant nurse walking up because i have to always support my breast while he feeds. I cant seem to get a grasp on feeding him w the moby. Im constantly stressing at work to get my break on time. Sometimes i get my lunch an hour after my first break. I go to my moms house to feed and she tells me 'oh hes not hungry, he ate 2 hours ago.' I just feel overwhelmed sometimes. I love the simple struggle free feedings wd do have. But they are not many. I thought breastfeeding would make us bond more..lol but he ended up bonding w his dad. Idk if its me bf that has complety made any intimacy seem like the last thing i want. I just need to stop being so hard on myself. I feel like its a competition against myself. And if i stop i will have failed. man i wish i had that same motivation towards dieting and excersising. so my biggest concern is, if I stop at 6 months, will I have done the best for my baby?
    I am so blessed!

    08-31-01
    02-13-12


    2 's in heaven

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
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    1,293

    Default Re: Is 6 months good enough?

    hey there. really you are the only person who can answer that question.

    i just wanted to say that i would not worry about the blood in the milk, it can happen to a lot of us and it is ok.

    it does sound like you have been through a lot but it also sounds like you are giving your baby bm and nurturing your lo at the breast which is great.

    we can work through some of what is getting to you, we could take it step by step. try not to get overwhelmed.

    in your own words "Yes we struggled at the begining, but overcame it." if you feel down remind yourself of that.

    pumping is hard work mama, but you can do it.

    and when you go to nurse the baby, just nurse whether or not someone tells you the baby is hungry. try to coordinate when you can stop by and when he gets a bottle more if you want. you mil can hold him off a little if you need. 2 hrs though, i think you could nurse then. baby may not be showing signs of being overly hungry but you could slip in a little nursing session.

    try not to be so hard on yourself and trust that you are doing the right thing. try not to stress too much about little things. you are doing it. right now you are successfully breastfeeding. good work mama

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
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    SoCal
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    Default Re: Is 6 months good enough?

    mama, you asked the question so I'm gonna tell you...NO if you stop it will NOT be best for baby. And you know what, I know that you know that too. We all struggle believe me but you CAN do this. You have come so far. Will you be introducing solids now? If so often times nursing gets a tad easier because baby is exploring other foods as well. Tell me what is the main thing that we can help you with to make it one step easier to keep you going?
    Mommy to Maxwell 10-9-07 weaned with love (a party and a remote control monster truck) on his 4th birthday
    My Boy 3-16-10
    And my sweet pea Sam 2-12-11

    Watch Your Language

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Apr 2012
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    California
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    30

    Default Re: Is 6 months good enough?

    I just need reassurance that im doing the right thing:-( that my babys behavior towards nursing is normal. I read about many moms whos babys do kick and fight like mine, but i just feel really down right now. I feel like we should be pros at it. And even though its been 6 months, i still feel that im doing something wrong when he latches off and on off and on and cries. I used to find it cute when i would accidently spray milk everywhere, but now its the beginning of our struggle because it seems he never wants to continue eating after letdown. I really want to have the freedom and confidence to get outside and take lo w me, wout worrying about feeding time. I know i shouod continue, i want to, ill probably wake up tomorrow and laugh at myself for feeling so down tonight:-)
    I am so blessed!

    08-31-01
    02-13-12


    2 's in heaven

  5. #5
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    20,643

    Default Re: Is 6 months good enough?

    I hope you woke up laughing this morning, mama. Of course you're doing the right thing by continuing. Not the easy thing, but the right thing. I know it's really hard not to compare yourself to other people- "Look at that mom, her baby is the same age as mine and she seems to love breastfeeding"- but comparisons are a great way to undermine your self-confidence. And it doesn't stop with nursing. I still remember taking my older kid to Target, and seeing another little girl, who was a month or two younger than my kid, chattering away in the shopping cart. Of course my daughter wasn't talking yet, and comparing her with that younger baby who already had multiple recognizable words had me literally in tears, worried that my child had some sort of deficit. Of course she didn't- she was just saving her words up for later in life.

    Breastfeeding does get easy at some point, but everyone reaches that point at a different time. With my first kid it was agonizing for the first 5 months, at which point it became merely bearable. It didn't get easy or enjoyable until around 8-9 months. But I ended up nursing my kid for 3 years and I am so glad I did.

    What issues are troubling you most, right now? Maybe we can help you over the hump, and suggest strategies that will enable you to nurse in public and on the go.

    ETA: the blood in your milk was most likely from a small broken blood vessel. These delicate vessels break easily, but luckily they also heal easily, usually by the next time you need to nurse or pump. You are unlikely to have noticed this if you hadn't been pumping, and pumping may have been responsible for the blood. It's easy to turn the suction up too high. If you're prone to broken blood vessels, you may want to tweak your pump technique by starting the pump out at the lowest possible level and only gradually turning it up to the most effective level. Bloody milk is totally safe for a baby to drink, but if the color freaks you out you can just leave bloody bottles in the fridge for a while. Eventually the blood will separate out and sink to the bottom of the bottle, allowing you to pour off the clean fraction on the top. A gravy separator may help you do this job more easily.
    Last edited by @llli*mommal; July 24th, 2012 at 05:13 AM.
    Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
    Coolest thing my little girl sang recently: "I love dat one-two pupples!"

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
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    10,440

    Default Re: Is 6 months good enough?

    The blood was probably from pumping. They happen.

    I bet your baby's fighting is still from overactive letdown.

    FWIW, I didn't enjoy breastfeeding until my babies were older, and I didn't love it until I realized what a great tool it is when I no longer had it and had to exclusively pump for my last baby.
    Susan
    Mama to my all-natural boys: Ian, 9-4-04, 11.5 lbs; Colton, 11-7-06, 9 lbs, in the water; Logan, 12-8-08, 9 lbs; Gavin, 1-18-11, 9 lbs; and an angel 1-15-06
    18+ months and for Gavin, born with an incomplete cleft lip and incomplete posterior cleft palate
    Sealed for time and eternity, 7-7-93
    Always babywearing, cosleeping and cloth diapering. Living with oppositional defiant disorder and ADHD. Ask me about cloth diapering and sewing your own diapers!

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
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    middle of IA
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    1,885

    Default Re: Is 6 months good enough?

    for me - admittedly an extremely smooth and easy nursing situation - it still got dramatically easier around 9 months, when DS was able to delay nursing a little, and was starting on solids. 6 months of milk is wonderful, and you should feel proud, but 6 more months of milk would be better, and you've gotten through the hardest part. so buckle down
    DS1 6/7/11
    DS2 10/29/13

    Nursing, pumping, cloth-diapering, babywearing, working professor mama with the awesomest SAHD ever.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Location
    California
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    418

    Default Re: Is 6 months good enough?

    To me, it seems a shame to quit now when you're probably right about to turn the corner to the "easy" part of the whole breastfeeding experience. You've put in all this time and effort, and now you're nearing the stage where it should start to pay off. You may find nursing an older baby more enjoyable and your baby may get better at dealing with your overactive let-down now that he's older. There are also various strategies for dealing with overactive let-down that you may or may not have already tried (expressing a little bit into a towel first, or trying laid-back positioning to help baby cope with the fast flow). I bet the overactive let down is why he struggles at the breast.

    As for nursing in public, I have never gotten super comfortable with that either and my son is now nearly 9 months. He fights the cover most of the time, so what I've taken to doing is just nursing him in the car when we're out and about. I wear a nursing tank underneath a regular shirt and just lift the hem of the regular shirt and pull down the top of the nursing tank. I've found I show less skin with the combo of a nursing tank and a regular t-shirt than with a nursing top alone because the regular shirt covers the top half of my breast. I feel comfortable enough nursing in the car with the nursing tank and regular shirt and no cover. The car provides some cover from onlookers and a sense of privacy especially if I get in the back seat. Might that work for you too?

    As for the pumping at work/nursing at lunch thing, I agree with those who have said to just offer to nurse when you see your son at lunch, regardless of whether your MIL says he just ate. My mom watches my son while I work and sometimes when I get home she's just fed him because she didn't know when I'd be home or he was hungry and couldn't wait, but he always seems to like to nurse even if he just got a bottle 30 minutes ago. It's like his way of reconnecting when I come home.

    As for whether 6 months is enough, only you can answer that. You have to decide if you've had it or if you can keep going. I'm not in a position to advise you there because nursing has been easy and enjoyable for me, so I'd have no reason to quit. I'm sorry it hasn't been so easy for you. If you do decide that you're done, you've done a great thing for your baby by giving him 6 months of breastmilk. More would be better, of course, but you've got to weigh that against your own sanity. It sounds like you don't really enjoy breastfeeding most of the time and if I were in your shoes, given that, I might be reluctant to keep working at it too. I just keep thinking you're probably right around the corner from when it gets easy and enjoyable and if so, it would be a shame to put in all this work just to miss out on the payoff! It also sounds like you're going to feel guilty if you quit, so that might be reason to keep going. Whatever you decide, it will be okay. If you want to keep going, we're here to help.

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Apr 2012
    Location
    California
    Posts
    30

    Default Re: Is 6 months good enough?

    Rereading my post I seem really negative about the whole situation. I love feeding my baby and I just wished he loved it as much as I do. It seems as though thats the only thing he looks to me for lol amd the rest of the time hrle wants daddy. Lol.
    I want to keep going. I dream of making it to our 1 year mark. Looking at his little chubby legs gives me a sense of accomplishment! Im doing that! Im helping him pack on the pounds! Yes it is easy to compare other babies to mine. But I shouldnt do that. My lo is a unique individual w different likes and dislikes than other babies.
    I will definitely keep going for now. I need to work on NIP. How long did it take some of u mommas to get the whole sling nursing down? I have a moby. Any tips on that? Maybe i could try w a cover?
    I am so blessed!

    08-31-01
    02-13-12


    2 's in heaven

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    SoCal
    Posts
    6,467

    Default Re: Is 6 months good enough?

    It took me several months and I never got the hang of sling nursing. Now we use our Ergo almost everyday and in the front carry it's simple to nurse.
    Mommy to Maxwell 10-9-07 weaned with love (a party and a remote control monster truck) on his 4th birthday
    My Boy 3-16-10
    And my sweet pea Sam 2-12-11

    Watch Your Language

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