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Thread: I feel like I'm doing everything wrong

  1. #1
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    Default I feel like I'm doing everything wrong

    My daughter is almost three weeks old and I'm exclusively breastfeeding. She has been gaining weight fine, but I still feel like I'm doing everything wrong. Right now my breasts hurt so badly. My original thought was mastitis, but I don't have any redness or lumps that come with a breast infection. My breasts are soft, no lumps, they just really hurt. Someone told me that maybe thrush could be the reason, but I don't see any white spots in her mouth. I noticed that her tongue has white residue, but I was able to rub a little bit of it off (not all).

    I just feel really uneducated. She doesn't have a set time when she eats, she just eats a lot throughout the day and night. Sometimes she'll go a couple hours between feedings, and sometimes she'll eat every thirty minutes. I feed her on one breast at a time, I don't switch. Is that wrong? I don't even know if my breast is getting emptied, but she usually sucks for about 15 minutes.

    Another thing is her tummy. Her tummy always feels full, it never feels really soft. She doesn't have any excess gas, but she gets hiccups a lot and goes through periods where she'll spit up a lot. She doesn't spit up after every feeding, but she's been doing it more often that she used to.

    I don't know what the point of this post is, I guess I just need some reassurance that everything is normal and that I'm doing everything right. I am so new to breastfeeding so everything is very confusing to me. Thank you so much!

  2. #2
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    Default Re: I feel like I'm doing everything wrong

    It is possible to have thrush and not see any physical signs on you or baby. Do you have any burning? Is it deep tissue pain? When I had thrush it felt like I was being sucked dry.
    If you obey all the rules, you miss all the fun. - Katharine Hepburn

  3. #3
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    Default Re: I feel like I'm doing everything wrong

    Nothing here is causing me alarm. Describe your pain. Is it initial only? subsides once the feeding really begins or after letdown? Is it just your nipple? Is it a throbbing or burning sensation? Every time? Worse on one side than the other?

    Way too lazy for formula

  4. #4
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    Default Re: I feel like I'm doing everything wrong

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*djs.mom View Post
    Nothing here is causing me alarm. Describe your pain. Is it initial only? subsides once the feeding really begins or after letdown? Is it just your nipple? Is it a throbbing or burning sensation? Every time? Worse on one side than the other?
    When she latches on it's a horrible burning and stabbing pain. The pain continues while she feeds, not as bad, but I can still feel it. My breasts still hurt after, as well as before. The pain feels like a deep, stabbing pain. My nipples are definitely sensitive though, its so bad that I cringe as she's latching on. I am having this pain with both breasts, although the right feels worse than my left.

  5. #5
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    Default Re: I feel like I'm doing everything wrong

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*kst.7399 View Post
    It is possible to have thrush and not see any physical signs on you or baby. Do you have any burning? Is it deep tissue pain? When I had thrush it felt like I was being sucked dry.
    Yeah, it's definitely a deep feeling pain.

  6. #6
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    Default Re: I feel like I'm doing everything wrong

    It could be thrush. But it could also be a poor latch. Me personally, I would get treated for thrush and see if it helps. The rest sounds normal though. You aren't doing everything wrong. Breastfeeding can shake your confidence for sure. But trust your body some.
    If you obey all the rules, you miss all the fun. - Katharine Hepburn

  7. #7
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    Default Re: I feel like I'm doing everything wrong

    What shape are your nipples after baby unlatches? And do you ever notice color changes in the nipple skin- going from white to blue to pink, or just white to pink?

  8. #8
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    Default Re: I feel like I'm doing everything wrong

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*mommal View Post
    What shape are your nipples after baby unlatches? And do you ever notice color changes in the nipple skin- going from white to blue to pink, or just white to pink?
    They look normal when she's done, just pulled out if that makes sense. My nipples are a little pink at the tip, but other than that they look normal to me. The pain is the
    worst when she latches on, it feels like someone is stabbing me with knives. She has an appointment for a weight recheck this morning so I'll bring up thrush. I really don't think its mastitis, I don't feel sick or any of the normal mastitis symptoms.

  9. #9
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    Default Re: I feel like I'm doing everything wrong

    Okay, pulled out instead of asymmetrical/misshapen is a good sign that the latch is good. Think of that as a piece of good news!

    A lot of moms have issues with something people call the "30 second sizzle" which is a stabbing pain that occurs when the baby first latches on. Usually it means the nipple is landing too shallow in baby's mouth, under the hard palate, and is being compressed and hurt as it is sucked back into the ideal position on the back of the baby's tongue underneath the soft palate. This is a sort of latch issue but not a really terrible one because it doesn't cause issues with milk transfer, and usually goes away as baby grows and can routinely achieve a deeper latch.

    Do you feel like you have a lot of milk? You might notice some or all of the following:
    - frequent feelings of fullness or engorgement
    - frequent plugged ducts
    - baby chokes, gasps, gags, coughs, splutters, or makes a clicking or clucking noise while nursing
    - if baby unlatches while nursing, you may see milk squirting or streaming from the breast
    - baby may be extremely gassy, have poosp which are consistently or frequently green, and may have very frequent spit-ups

    Honestly, what you describe sounds most like thrush or some sort of bacterial infection. Definitely talk to the doc about it, and if they diagnose thrush in baby or in you, make sure that both you and baby are treated. It is normal for one member of the nursing pair to be asymptomatic though oth are infected, and if both mom and baby are not treated, the untreated person will just reinfect the one who has been treated.

  10. #10
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    Default Re: I feel like I'm doing everything wrong

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*mommal View Post
    Okay, pulled out instead of asymmetrical/misshapen is a good sign that the latch is good. Think of that as a piece of good news!

    A lot of moms have issues with something people call the "30 second sizzle" which is a stabbing pain that occurs when the baby first latches on. Usually it means the nipple is landing too shallow in baby's mouth, under the hard palate, and is being compressed and hurt as it is sucked back into the ideal position on the back of the baby's tongue underneath the soft palate. This is a sort of latch issue but not a really terrible one because it doesn't cause issues with milk transfer, and usually goes away as baby grows and can routinely achieve a deeper latch.

    Do you feel like you have a lot of milk? You might notice some or all of the following:
    - frequent feelings of fullness or engorgement
    - frequent plugged ducts
    - baby chokes, gasps, gags, coughs, splutters, or makes a clicking or clucking noise while nursing
    - if baby unlatches while nursing, you may see milk squirting or streaming from the breast
    - baby may be extremely gassy, have poosp which are consistently or frequently green, and may have very frequent spit-ups

    Honestly, what you describe sounds most like thrush or some sort of bacterial infection. Definitely talk to the doc about it, and if they diagnose thrush in baby or in you, make sure that both you and baby are treated. It is normal for one member of the nursing pair to be asymptomatic though oth are infected, and if both mom and baby are not treated, the untreated person will just reinfect the one who has been treated.
    She does gasp and make the clicking sound occasionally, and I have noticed her spitting up a little more than she used to. The pedi said no to thrush, so maybe I just have an infection. I really didn't want antibiotics, but I have an appointment tomorrow with my OB.

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