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Thread: co-workers vent (kinda long)

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Posts
    232

    Angry co-workers vent (kinda long)

    Why is it that my co-workers think that I need them to tell me what to do with my lo?

    I have been back at work for 2 months now and today, I'm pretty out of it, because Ada Grace woke up every 2 hours last night. One of the girls I work with asked me to P'd me off (I didn't realize that I looked that bad today). I told her no one, but I was up most of the night w/the baby. So all at once 3 or 4 of my co-workers start telling me to give her formula, give her cereal--I need to train her to sleep through the night, need to let her CIO--WTF?!?!

    I believe strongly in the philosophy that everyone who has kids has the right to raise them the way that they want--I don't and wouldn't propose to tell them how to handle their children unless my opinion is blatantly asked--what makes them think I want theirs?!

    Ada Grace is 4 months old--I WILL NOT be giving her cereal in her bottle, nor will I give her anything other than BM until she is 6 months old. I don't find that to be the perfect opportunity to wean her to give her formula--in fact, she refuses to take the stuff. My aunt tried earlier this week because I hadn't been able to pump enough milk and she was hungry--Ada Grace took one swallow, spit the nipple out, and wouldn't allow my aunt to put it back into her mouth....I was very excited and feel like this is a victory for our BF relationship!!!

    Sorry to vent, I just can't believe that everyone thinks they need to tell me how to take care of my baby. I have a 2 1/2 year old, and he's made it just fine and no worse for the wear!!

    Krista
    Krista
    Wife to Barney
    Mommy to Justin Reed
    Mommy to Ada Grace (7-7-06) 7 lbs 14 oz, 20 lbs 14 oz at 1 year


    Our little Angel, Henry James, grew his wings December 14, 2007

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    Wisconsin
    Posts
    195

    Default Re: co-workers vent (kinda long)

    It's both funny and incredibly annoying when co-workers don't get it. Mine made me crazy today too. I was out the past couple of days with mastitis and now a couple of women asked "how the girls were" (which was funny), and if I was going to hang it up now because of being sick. Gee yeah *sarcasm*, one case of mastitis is definitely going to make me hang up the horns. Idiots.
    ***********
    Mommy to William, 4/29/09, 7 lbs 13 oz, 21 inches.
    Mommy to Evan, 3/18/06. 7 lbs 3 oz, 21 1/4 inches.
    Nursed both boys to 14 months
    Birth Doula
    Wisconsin!

    ***********

  3. #3
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    2,178

    Default Re: co-workers vent (kinda long)

    I'm sorry you've had to deal with people like that. One thing that has stopped my dh from trying to fix all my problems when all I've needed was to do was vent a little, was to tell him outright before I said a thing that I wasn't looking for advice, I was just upset/tired/having a bad day (take your pick), and needed to vent a little. He got the pic, and makes sure not to suggest solutions when I tell him that.

    Female co-workers may be another story though...I've had to omit things many a time so I don't get advice that wasn't asked for. For instance, If I was up all night with the baby, and somebody asked me why I looked like crap/sick etc., I just would say I couldn't sleep last night, which was totally truthful for me, because the baby wouldn't let me, LOL. Saying "I'm sorry, I'm just having a really bad day and talking about it won't make me feel any better...also works. As does, "I'm sorry, but I was in the middle of xyz project and the boss needs it right away...gotta get back to work"

    If all else fails, try very hard to just ignore the advice...I've found that thinking about something else while the bad advice giver is talking can be very effective for me to not lose my cool with them...just remember to smile and nod and say HHMMMM once in a while.

  4. #4

    Default Re: co-workers vent (kinda long)

    Maybe reveiwing this and picking out a few to keep in mind, in case this situation comes up again? http://www.lalecheleague.org/FAQ/criticism.html

    Or, perfect the "nod and smile and forget". Nod and smile to let the person know you heard them, then immediately forget whatever it was they said.
    Shannon
    LLL Leader

    Protect your privacy online; don't use your full name. Click My Alias at the top left corner.

    I'm horrible at html and encoding links, so I apologize in advance for all the long links!

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