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Thread: Normal?

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Posts
    199

    Default Normal?

    I am going to post this in the sleep section also. I apologize ahead of time for long post.
    Some background. DS has struggled nearly all his life with waking up several times a night. We started having DH go in to give him a binky and got him to the point where DS was sleeping all night, or waking 1-2 times in a 12 hour period for several months. It was HEAVEN. He has been easy to put to bed since 8 or 9 months. We just do our nightly routine, I nurse him and then put him to bed, wide awake. He maybe needed to be given his binky and laid down into bed again once or twice, but he was very easy.
    About a month ago, he started to wake up more often at night. He had been so used to getting to nurse every time he woke (because he wouldn't wake between 11 and 5, which were DHs times to take care of him) so he was VERY upset when he didn't get to nurse. He was sick at the time and getting his last molar in, so I just nursed him. We tried after that to have DH go in and give him a binky and he would scream for literally 1-2 hours with DH in there trying to calm him down. He would only calm down if I nursed him. He was yelling "mama" "nurse" and "other side" (I say other side when we move to the other side, so that is how he asks to nurse now) the entire time. We decided that it was easier on all of us to just have me nurse him. The middle of last month, I went to a training and was gone more than usual. He started to get VERY clingy to me and even point at the door and cry for me, which he has never done. That week, he also started to demand that I take him into bed with me when he woke up at 5, when he used to be very insistent that he wanted his own bed. He also started insisting that I nurse him until he was almost asleep (which would sometimes take 45 minutes!!!). The last couple days, he has been waking every hour or so until I take him into bed with me because I can't handle "getting up" to nurse him (even though DH brings him into bed) and take him back to bed. Last night, he wouldn't go back to his bed when he woke at 11 and then had to sleep on me the entire night. He does wake several times when he is in bed with me and has to use me as a pacifier, which has made me more raw than I was when I first started nursing him.
    Is this normal? Will he go back to his previous "normal"? Why would he suddenly just drastically change the way he sleeps?
    Please excuse my typos, I am always NAK.

    DS since 1/30/11

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    10,440

    Default Re: Normal?

    Teething. Illness. Developmental milestones about to be met. Changes in the family. Something new. General separation anxiety.

    Go with it, and eventually it does get better.
    Susan
    Mama to my all-natural boys: Ian, 9-4-04, 11.5 lbs; Colton, 11-7-06, 9 lbs, in the water; Logan, 12-8-08, 9 lbs; Gavin, 1-18-11, 9 lbs; and an angel 1-15-06
    18+ months and for Gavin, born with an incomplete cleft lip and incomplete posterior cleft palate
    Sealed for time and eternity, 7-7-93
    Always babywearing, cosleeping and cloth diapering. Living with oppositional defiant disorder and ADHD. Ask me about cloth diapering and sewing your own diapers!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Posts
    5,735

    Default Re: Normal?

    How old is your son?
    Yes this sounds normal. What was maybe unusual was the super long sleep stretches starting at 8 months. Young children need comfort at night. And the comforter that was designed just for them is mom and the breast. All others are substitutes that a child may or may not accept.

    Many moms and dads find (safe) bedsharing can help everyone get more sleep, when they relax and simply decide that is how they are going to do things for now. Usually more sleep is lost with constant ups and downs and bed changes. But if that is not your experience, you can try something else.

    If you are getting sore, work on positioning and latch changes. A growing child often means positioning changes are needed to keep breastfeeding comfortable.
    Last edited by @llli*lllmeg; July 3rd, 2012 at 06:27 PM.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Posts
    199

    Default Re: Normal?

    Thanks. I guess I just needed to know it is normal.
    Meg, he hasn't slept the long stretches until he was maybe 14 months. He has been good about falling asleep since 8 months, just not staying asleep. But since I don't sleep through the night, I have come to terms that he won't either. Thanks for the advice about changing positions. I am worried about him rolling off the bed, so I tend to only give him the nipple closest to the inside of the bed. Any advice on how to work with this, other than buying something?
    Please excuse my typos, I am always NAK.

    DS since 1/30/11

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Location
    Northern Cal.
    Posts
    4,983

    Default Re: Normal?

    I commented on your other post too, but Meg reminded me - teething can also make breastfeeding uncomfortable. Children often have to relearn their latch a bit as new teeth come in. In my experience, the canines coming in can totally mess things up, especially while your baby's mouth is sore. Try different positions. Also, have you tried motrin or tylenol? Might help your LO sleep a little better, if discomfort is the cause (if the problem is general separation anxiety and developmental milestones, obviously it won't help, but I think it's worth a try).


    You can call me JoMo!

    Mom to baby boy Joe, born 5/4/09 and breastfed for more than two and a half years, and baby girl Maggie, born 7/9/12.

  6. #6

    Default Re: Normal?

    My DD is 16 months right now, and didn't night wean until 13 1/2 months. We coslept completely until about 9 months and then gradually started her off in her own bed (floor mattress) at that time, eventually having her sleep in her room all night at that 13 1/2 month mark. She would sleep from 9pm to about 6am after night weaning! I felt amazing! Then THREE of her 1 year molars starting coming in at once at 15 months, and one canine started at the same time too. Poor girl was a mess! She started waking at 3am every night, so DH has been going into her room and sleeping with her from whenever she wakes up until about 6am when I wake up to nurse her again. I'm pregnant right now, and can't handle any more night nursing which is why DH is going in there for that wake up.

    On any night that her teeth give her a break she'll sleep through until about 5:30am or 6am, so that is nice. But more often than not in the past month she's been up. Thankfully having a floor mattress in her room means DH can lay down, and even if she doesn't want to go back to sleep she at least stops crying because she's happy to have someone with her. Sometimes she'll snuggle and fall back asleep, and sometimes she'll just wander around her room and read books. Sometimes she pees and then sits on DH's face with a damp diaper...that's not his favorite

    We don't normally do medicine for her, but having so many big teeth coming in together has been really tough for her. She's gotten Advil a few times in the last couple of weeks whenever she is obviously in pain, and that does help her sleep better, whether for bed time or nap time.

    Oh, my nipples were SUPER sore for a few weeks too, and I thought it was the pregnancy but I actually think it was her saliva. It gets more acidic (I think) when they're teething to help the teeth come through the gums, and is harder on your nipples too. Her teeth have all erupted through the gums now, and my nipples feel better.
    Still nursing my 15 month old cloth-diapered, , DD, and with #2 due January 2013!

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Dec 2011
    Location
    The Armpit of the Universe
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    248

    Default Re: Normal?

    I have a much younger babe, so I don't know anything about , but as far as keeping him in the middle of the bed, to switch sides, I tilt my body over (like 3/4 of the way onto my stomach) so he's nursing off the top breast (the one farther from him if I'm on my back). That way he doesn't move at all, and my back and hips get a break from being in the same position all night. He's usually latched on the entire night--those darn teeth!

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Location
    Northern Cal.
    Posts
    4,983

    Default Re: Normal?

    I installed a bed rail on my side of the bed so that Joe couldn't roll off the side. Made it easier and more comfortable for me to cosleep (because I could switch sides more easily). Nursing from the top boob works for a lot of people, but for me it always seemed to cause clogged ducts. Bed rails technically aren't safe for infants, but for toddlers, who are too big to fall into the gap, they are fine.


    You can call me JoMo!

    Mom to baby boy Joe, born 5/4/09 and breastfed for more than two and a half years, and baby girl Maggie, born 7/9/12.

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Posts
    5,735

    Default Re: Normal?

    Ditto the bed rail, that is what we do too, we used a mesh rail that attached to the mattress so no gaps, so in our case it was fine for infants but I worrled with a toddler due to baby waking and climbing OVER the rail. I think I eventaully got rid of the rail and layed the (otherwise unused) crib mattress on the floor so my son would land on that if he fell, which he never did at that piont, he was like a heat seaking missle rolling into me more. I WANTED to just put the mattress on the floor but husband refused.

    But I also learned to nurse from the "top" breast when sidelying so I never needed to move myself or baby to get both sides taken care of. This should be fairly easy with a baby this age/size. Does not work for you?

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Posts
    199

    Default Re: Normal?

    I haven't really tried the side lying thing. I figured out I could just have him sort of lyinh oln top of me to nurse from that side. Hee likes to sleep on his stomach anyway so that seems to work. Ditto on the heat seeking missle.
    Over the last several days DS has decided he wants to sleep in the bed with us all night. I don't really mind it, but have a few questions/concerns. First is a big concern. We have been putting him down for sleep at his normal bedtime (around 7:30) and before he would wake a few times and be nursed back to sleep easily until we wnt to sleep (between 10 and 10:30). Now he wakes within an hour of going to sleep and stays awake until we go tol sleep (and I often have a hard time getting him to settle down even then). He is losing 2-3 hours of sleep a night and getting very fussy during the day. He doesn't make up that time with naps. In fact, sleep seems something he is totally against now. An attitude he hasn't had since he was an infant. I am not sure what happened, but we are back to sometimes over an hour to get him to bed and since he was no older than 9 months, it has only been a 20 min process and he would go to sleep on his own when we put him in the crib, no nursing to sleep required except for naps, but then he would come up and ask to nurse when he was tird and ready for a nap.
    The other question is how dangerous is it for his teeth to keep my nipple in his mouth for long periods of time? I try to pull it out when he is all the way asleep, but sometimes I fall asleep too. I don't want his teeth to rot.
    Please excuse my typos, I am always NAK.

    DS since 1/30/11

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