Please Help!... baby will no longer latch, Long post

[@llli*canne]

Hi - I am new here and hope that a few of you have some input or advice on this. My daughter is 13 wks old and has never EBF. I have been pumping. It started in the hospital... we had a very good labor and delivery and she latched immediately, but had a poor latch and caused me pain. I saw a lactation consultant in the hospital who gave me a nipple shield to use for a week or two until my daughter grew and hopefully would latch better when her mouth was larger. During those first two weeks, she wasn't transferring milk well... and therefore wasn't gaining well and my supply was going down. So, my LC said I needed to pump and bottle feed my breastmilk to get my baby's weight up. So, that is what we did for the next two weeks. Then, at four weeks old... I went to see my LC and my daughter latched perfectly! It was wonderful. She would show frustration at the breast, but when I could get her to latch... she transferred milk well and had a good latch. So from that point on, I tried to get her to nurse. She already acted like she preferred the bottle, but I worked with her, etc. I really would only get about one nursing session a day with her b/c she would immediately scream when I brought her to the breast or put her in any nursing hold. Then at 9 weeks old, she had her first routine shots and was also teething.... so I decided to give trying to breastfeed a rest. I didn't want her to get a worse aversion to my breast since she was fussy from shots and teething.... and already would fuss at the breast anyway. Well, during the four or five days that I didn't try to nurse.... I guess she completely got used to the bottles and will hardly ever latch now. I have been doing tons of skin-to-skin in the past four weeks, I have tried to use the nipple shield so she will feel the plastic nipple and hopefully latch, but she doesn't go for it. I have only gotten her to latch a handful of times if I'm able to trick her or get her when she's super happy and MIGHT latch on. She acts happy at the breast and if I express some milk.... she will lick at the nipple, etc... but to put the nipple in her mouth.. she will spit it out as though she doesn't want skin in her mouth and prefers the bottle.

So.. one of my main questions is... does anyone have experience getting an older baby on to the breast? Is it too late for us? I have seen two LC's and they both were worthless on any ideas. I have been trying to do research on anything else I can do to bring her to the breast. I terribly want to nurse my daughter and have PLENTY of milk to do this. Any suggestions or encouraging words would be so helpful..... I would really appreciate it.........

[@llli*aprilsmagic]

Stories like this make me sad. You didn't get the right advice, which would have been to maybe try an SNS instead of pumping and bottlefeeding, or to try alternative ways to feed, and now you have an older baby who won't nurse. There are babies who have nursed even much older, but it's hard.

http://thebreastfeedingmother.blogsp...reastfeed.html

What about trying an SNS under a nipple shield? I did that for a while to try to nurse my cleft baby.

[@llli*ryanandjoshsmom]

Have you tried feeding her when she is super sleepy or while she is sleeping? This is how I am currently feeding my dd who is refusing all feeds while awake. She will scream and push the breast away while awake, but will latch when asleep. She has never had a bottle and has a breast aversion due to different reasons, but just wanted to toss the idea out there. Good luck mama!

[@llli*lasbi.modeu]

Have you tried feeding her when she is super sleepy or while she is sleeping? This is how I am currently feeding my dd who is refusing all feeds while awake. She will scream and push the breast away while awake, but will latch when asleep. She has never had a bottle and has a breast aversion due to different reasons, but just wanted to toss the idea out there. Good luck mama!

I never had this problem but I read that when a baby goes on a nursing strike, this is one of the possible solutions.

Good luck!!

[@llli*esthervegan]

you are so close to getting this baby back to the breast....
On the plus side
1.You have a plentiful milk supply!
2. This baby has latched and nursed..although not recently
3. You have found La Leche League
I know a mother who adopted a 4 month old baby from China and she breastfed that baby.

There is information on suck training at kellymom.com
maybe you could find a local LLL leader to give you one on one advice. Unlike some of the professionals who were not able to help you, La Leche League Leaders can be a well springs of guidance and support and they don't charge.

[@llli*auderey]

have you tried laid back nursing? or tried it recently? sometimes what didn't work even a couple days ago will work now. good luck and hang in there!

http://www.biologicalnurturing.com/

[@llli*canne]

Thank you so much for the comments. I am still trying... but nothing new has happened yet. I'm doing my best to NOT give up... but this is so hard. I don't understand why she will not latch. Every time she gets near me and licks or acts somewhat comforted, she acts as though she doesn't know what to do with me and prefers the bottle. This is killing me. Even as I type this I am sobbing. I want this more than anything (except her health of course), but I feel like it's never going to happen. She will be four months old on Friday and we haven't made any progress in weeks.

Maybe one day it will click with her. I honestly feel like that is the last hope because nothing else is working. In the mean time, I'm still pumping and have plenty of milk for her. On the down side, that means I cannot comfort her at the breast and have the breastfeeding relationship/bonding that I was so hoping for.

[@llli*littleturtlelove]

I have to commend you for all your efforts. I have so many moms who stop bf even after a day or so of trying. To be pumping and trying to latch for almost 4 months is awesome! It is still not too late. There are a few things I have heard work for other moms with older babies that haven't been mentioned. I heard of one baby about your daughter's age who did a sort of "re-birth" with his mom. They took a bath together and were skin to skin for a while. This baby had never latched before and then just fell over and started breastfeeding. Have you also tried pumping to get the milk flowing and then latching her? Maybe having food right there and ready will help entice her. Sometimes babies do get used to the bottle because they have to work for their food when breastfeeding. Doing compressions can also help.