Colic and breast refusal

[@llli*kristina.gomez]

My little guy is now 2 months old. I would say he has a fairly good dose of colic that lasts almost all day but he sleeps well at night. The colic started about 3 weeks ago. I took him to the doctor just to rule out infections and such and he had gained so well (9 pounds at birth and was 13 lbs 10oz at 8 weeks). She suggested that maybe I was over feeding him. I told her I didn't think you could over feed a breastfed baby and she handed me a pamphlet on colic!
I have been off dairy now for 15 days and wheat for a few days. I already avoid any soy like the plague. I am going to try tree nuts and eggs and corn starting today.
His typical pattern goes like this: he wakes up super happy and smiley. It can last anywhere from
10 - 30 minutes. He does not like to be held during this time. Then it slowly turns into him protesting so I pick him up and try sling him if he'll let me. Then he starts to get tired and shows hunger cues, BUT as soon as I put him in any kind of nursing position or close to my breast he gets very angry and cries hard. So I try to calm him down (5S's, baths, walks outside, ect)and eventually he'll signal again to nurse (rooting around trying to nurse on my shoulder, hands to mouth ect). And again he gets angry when I move him to nurse. He is crying this whole time and my husband and I are doing everything to try and calm him. His crying can last anywhere from a few minutes to an hour or two. We finally get him settled and asleep. He will start to move around in his sleep and then I can nurse him. I can only nurse him when he is asleep or just waking up. Then he wakes up happy and we start all over again.
I can't go anywhere or give my toddler the attention she needs because he cries hard and we can't calm him. It seems like he wants to nurse but then gets mad at the thought. I am tandem nursing and struggled with oversupply in the beginnning. I don't believe I have over supply now but I almost always feed him reclined back anyways. I also feed him 90% of the time off the right breast. I think he likes the slower flow. I also think he is upper frenulum tied.
Any ideas what we can do to help him comfort nurse? Any ideas why he might refuse the breast while awake? Any ideas for helping soothe colic? He cries so much and I feel like I am failing him somehow. Thanks for any thoughts or advice.

[@llli*esthervegan]

greetings Kristina,
Wouldn't it be wonderful if everything we learned with our first babies translated into being helpful with our second?
I know you feel like you're at wits end. And I know how much I disliked stalling to meet the needs of my older child because the baby was inconsolable.
I know there is some controversy over pacifiers, but for a baby who is gaining well and who knows how to nurse and for a mother whose milk supply is not a problem, maybe just maybe your lo might enjoy quality comfort milk free sucking and perhaps a pacifier might offer him and you some peace.

[@llli*phi]

Have you tried keeping him in motion while getting him to latch? For awhile I had to walk with mine, bounce him on my knee, or rock back and forth with him while getting him latched. Otherwise he would just scream at the breast.

[@llli*worknpump]

Hang in there. While my DD doesn't have colic, she tends to refuse the breast when she is just the SLIGHTEST bit sleepy (which is about 45 minutes after waking up). She also won't nurse right when she wakes up and is happy and alert. So, I pretty much exclusively feed her in her sleep. I get her almost completely asleep in my arms or in a sling, sneak the paci out of her mouth, sneak my nipple in, and then she usually nurses just fine. It's a big pain and I'm hoping this phase doesn't last long. Or maybe that's just how she is. I dunno. So I wouldn't worry about him refusing your breast as long as he is nursing while he is sleepy/asleep. Also, I think some of that rooting around/hunger cues (hands to mouth, etc.) is just plain tiredness. DD does hunger cues all the time. I think at around 2 months hands to mouth doesn't necessarily mean hunger. I always offer (as it sounds like you do) but then try not to get frustrated when she refuses.