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Thread: I dont want to fail! Advise.

  1. #1

    Default I dont want to fail! Advise.

    This may sound odd as I don't actually have another newborn YET! But I need all the advise in the world re: breastfeeding.

    A little bit of background on me, I've got two little boy's already, Logan(28 months) & Max (9 months) Im expecting baby number three & due in August, anyway I really am determind to breastfeed this baby for so so many reason's health benefits for me & baby, convience, and I want my children to be brought up thinking breastfeeding is normal, unlike I was! I breastfeed Max for his first 4-5 feeds, however the midwives in hospital wasn't very supportive, once he had latched, they left me for hours on end, and quite honestly I wasn't 100% sure how to latch him correctly. (I ended up with an extremely sore blister on nipple, which Ive now been told would be from him latching wrongly)
    I gave up without the support of health proffesionals, and without the support of my family, bottles were easier option.

    But my determination has grown, and this is something Im passionate about... I want my midwives & HV to be involved & help regarding correct latching, and Im just worried that they wont.

    No one in my family(grandparents/parents/aunties etc) have ever breastfed, so in a way its almost a taboo, and although its the most amazing thing on this earth, I know they wont agree, so a bit nervous about how to approach the subject with them, and how to find support. My husband is amazing and fully supports the breastfeeding, and will encourage me all the way.

    I just need as much advise, on how to get health professionals more involved, how to get my family to be supportive, how to manage breastfeeding and distractiong two young children??

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Posts
    4,894

    Default Re: I dont want to fail! Advise.

    I think talking about it ahead of time is important. Tell your Midwife that you need a lot of support and are feeling unsure. Maybe hire a doula who is there for that exact purpose. Enlist the help of a great LC and spend a lot of time here. Tons of great llladies to cheer you on and hold your hand.
    If you obey all the rules, you miss all the fun. - Katharine Hepburn

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Location
    middle of IA
    Posts
    1,882

    Default Re: I dont want to fail! Advise.

    Hi mama,

    congratulations on your pregnancy, and you have come to the right place!

    I highly recommend that you get a copy of "The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding" (about $14 on amazon) because it will give you so many basic answers. Now is the best time to read it, before baby is here. And then you can post questions here too. THis is also good reading:
    http://www.llli.org/nb/nbnovdec08p4.html

    Right now, think ahead to your first week and month with a new baby. Your primary job will be to feed that baby. So set up any way you can to not do other jobs during that time: cleaning, shopping, cooking, dishes, laundry - none of that should be you. Older kids - try to ensure you have someone else around to help look after them as much as possible, especially the first week - this all can be DH of course as long as he isn't at work, but the first month after a baby is the time to call in favors for meals and help around the house.

    ETA: Also, is there a La Leche League meeting near you? It's really helpful to go while you're pregnant, to learn some stuff and to get some support networks started! You can even call your LLL leader from the hospital if you're having trouble.

    Good luck!
    DS1 6/7/11
    DS2 10/29/13

    Nursing, pumping, cloth-diapering, babywearing, working professor mama with the awesomest SAHD ever.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Location
    Cincinnati, OH
    Posts
    71

    Default Re: I dont want to fail! Advise.

    I read every book at the library I could find on breastfeeding before my daughter was born. There are some great books out there. You may even be able to find a video online, or I know my local WIC office gave me a free bf video. There should be a Lactation Consultant you can meet with at the hospital too. Your passion and determination puts success in your favor. You should also as suggested contact a LLL leader in your area and maybe go to a meeting and get some advice from there. Best of luck!

  5. #5
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Posts
    48

    Default Re: I dont want to fail! Advise.



    Don't be afraid to ask for help. Whether it be with your older kiddos so you can focus on the wee one or if you are having doubts/obstacles with nursing don't wait to get help. Those early days can be overwhelming. LLL is a wonderful resource. Check and see if there are any meetings you can start going to! The mother-to-mother support is incredible.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Mar 2012
    Location
    Maryland
    Posts
    74

    Default Re: I dont want to fail! Advise.

    You should also attend the free breastfeeding courses they host at the hospitals and schools. I found out about the free courses through my insurance provider. They mailed out a whole bunch of things when I told them I was pregnant. As another mama mentioned, WIC is also a awesome place to get free LC advise (they always have 1 there) and get a ton of support. They offer free courses, give you free books/manuals and can put you in contact with support groups.

    I also had to breastfeed for the first time when I had my daughter. Nobody in the family breastfed and I had no support at all. The first 2 weeks were the worst, I was tired, feverish and my breastmilk took 6-7 days to arrive. The only advice I can truly offer is don't give up! Keep trying and you will get it right!! Good Luck!!
    Proud of Baby

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Location
    Richmond, VA
    Posts
    10

    Default Re: I dont want to fail! Advise.

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*LaurenC View Post
    You should also attend the free breastfeeding courses they host at the hospitals and schools. I found out about the free courses through my insurance provider. They mailed out a whole bunch of things when I told them I was pregnant. As another mama mentioned, WIC is also a awesome place to get free LC advise (they always have 1 there) and get a ton of support. They offer free courses, give you free books/manuals and can put you in contact with support groups.


    If your insurance company doesn't tell you about them, check your doctor or hospital. My hospital had a list of their classes online that including breastfeeding classes. Do you have any friends that have breastfed? None of my family members did either, and I still think my mother thinks I'm crazy for it, but she's coming around to accept it and be more supportive. But it's good to have someone (who has "been there, done that") you can go to for emotional support when you need it. And, we all need it once in a while. As for your family, I don't think there's a reason to bring it up and have a specific talk. That could make it out to be a bigger deal than what it is. But, when it does come up in conversation, if they don't seem supportive, educate them on the benefits and tell them why it's important to you. You might be surprised with their reactions!

    Also, I want to give you a piece of advice I wish I had and thought about in the hospital: There should be a lc there to help you. And when you meet that person, ask them for help, and lots of it! Don't expect to know everything after one visit. I had someone who was nice, but was only so helpful because she visited me once and just explained the process, using her fingers as visual aides instead of giving me any hands on help in getting a latch. Also, no one told me how often I was supposed to feed her or what to expect in diapers while I was in the hospital. So, I wasn't in the best of shape going home without much information or help. I wish I would have asked for more help in the hospital!
    Mommy to Penelope born 04-21-12, 7lb 1oz

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    10,440

    Default Re: I dont want to fail! Advise.

    I want to point out that the hospital is a HORRIBLE place to get BFing advice. There is an article reviewing some research going around FB right now that indictates that most women want to breastfeed, but the hospital derails the majority!

    The hospital IBCLCs are usually overworked (they often have so many women to see that they can't give but a few minutes to each).

    In the hospital, you may also receive interventions that make breastfeeding more difficult. It is a known fact that inductions, epidurals, c-sections, separation of mother and baby, various hospital procedures, etc, all make breastfeeding harder than it needs to be for mother or baby or both. It's not true for everyone, but it's very possible.

    So....instead....find an IBCLC away from the hospital and get her lined up.

    In August, ALL insurance companies are required by LAW to pay for lactation services and supplies. http://www.hrsa.gov/womensguidelines/

    http://bayareabreastfeeding.wordpres...-a-trainwreck/

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/0...890,b=facebook

    I know not all hospitals are horrible, but a lot give out just shameful advice. And bear in mind your LC in the hospital could be a nurse with some extra training. A good friend of mine is an RN in the NICU and L&D department of a big hospital who attended some extra CE on lactation. But she is not by any stretch of the word a lactation consultant (and she has been heard to tell moms one bottle is just fine and it's totally Ok to send the baby to the nursery). Yet they have her working as an LC too. So you could be learning from someone like that.
    Susan
    Mama to my all-natural boys: Ian, 9-4-04, 11.5 lbs; Colton, 11-7-06, 9 lbs, in the water; Logan, 12-8-08, 9 lbs; Gavin, 1-18-11, 9 lbs; and an angel 1-15-06
    18+ months and for Gavin, born with an incomplete cleft lip and incomplete posterior cleft palate
    Sealed for time and eternity, 7-7-93
    Always babywearing, cosleeping and cloth diapering. Living with oppositional defiant disorder and ADHD. Ask me about cloth diapering and sewing your own diapers!

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