Re: Are we too far gone?
See an IBCLC for sure! I also suggest a visit to an otoloaryngologist (a.k.a. an ear, nose, and throat doc or ENT). I'd want to be really certain that baby has been thoroughly checked for tongue tie or palate issues (like a cleft, which can be hidden beneath the skin of the palate).
While you are getting this all figured out, you must maintain supply by pumping. You want to use a hospital-grade rental (preferable) or very good double electric pump with correctly sized breast shields, and you want to pump frequently. Aim for 10-12 sessions per day right now- and I know that is a very challenging thing for a new mom to do! But hopefully it will only be temporary. In the absence of some physical issue precluding nursing (for example, we have a wonderful mama here who has pumped for over a year for her baby who has a cleft and is unable to nurse), there is every reason to think that you should eventually be able to get baby to the breast and nurse full-time.
I strongly suggest exploring ways to feed baby at the breast. You may be able to use a supplemental nursing system or Lact-aid to supplement baby at the breast. I suggest looking at kellymom.com for pages on paced feeding and how to bottle-feed the breastfed baby.
Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
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