I have been battling my pump for some time now with the same issues. I also have a similar schedule (gone 10+ hours with a nasty public-transit commute). Here are a few things I have figured out through trial and error that have been helping:
**Buy a hand pump. Pump while you are watching TV, checking email, whatever, at home when you are relaxed. Not only is the hand pump more comfortable, but I am able to get another 4 oz a day doing this. Pump while the babe nurses. Pump a little, put it down, pump a little more later. Mine lives on my coffee table. I KNOW it sucks having to pump or think about pumping all the time, but...well... :-/
**Pumpin' Pals are nice to have, too...They are flanges that are tilted so you can pump while leaning back. A little pricey, but it's been nice to snuggle on the couch and pump a little during Mad Men.
**While pumping at work, stop the pump for 5 minutes at some point, and start it up again with the stimulation cycle. This is the only way I can get another let-down...and I'm convinced that nipples become overstimulated and just uncomfortable...totally counter-productive.
**Set a time that you are willing to sit and pump, and stick to it even if you only get a little bit. This is good for sanity. Don't measure your success in ounces, measure it in minutes. Commit to pumping for 30 minutes, 3-4 times a day, and come what will. Stop the pump at 30 minutes no matter what, (ok maybe I would go another few minutes if I had some sort of huge let-down happening) and try again next time. I know it may be 'bad for supply' but I find that breasts on the verge of engorgement pump a lot easier. Cover your bottles up with your shirt so you are not tempted to count the ounces. Take the pressure off a bit.
**Pictures and video of your little one could be a big help, but I find taking my mind off of it altogether is the only way to go (hence why I'm here right now!)
**"Treat" yourself while you are pumping. If you have an office with a computer, browse the internet, read a book or a magazine, do a little online shopping, have a little leisure time...eat a cookie...or read the LLLI forums for support.
** If you are lucky enough to have a caregiver that can bring your baby to you for one nursing a day, it is a huge help.
I have just been *squeaking* by with milk for the last two weeks or so, but have made a commitment to myself to do WHAT I CAN and nothing more. I've been (or I am still in...) the exact same place you are in - so frustrating! I figured out that my anxiety about it was WAY worse for my family than the idea that my son MAY have to have a bottle of formula now and then (hasn't happened yet, but it's ok if it does). I was literally crying at every pumping session, waking up in the middle of the night (I don't know about you, but late night pumping is just not an option - I am zombie-like enough already) to pump, and FREAKING OUT and feeling totally inadequate just about every single minute. Ick. Not that I don't have my moments, but, I just had to change how I looked at it. Sorry to turn this into a rant about my experience, but what I'm trying to say is, I Get It.