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Thread: Anxiety!

  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Posts
    21

    Default Anxiety!

    Hi all! I am new here and to breastfeeding, and I need Help! I am so anxious over feeding times I think it's making me sick! My 9-day old LO is doing so well nursing and just overnight had 5 wet and poopies, so I'm not concerned about that. I am concerned that Wednesday night he was every 2 hrs but last night I had to almost force every 4. We are co-sleeping and trying to master the side-lying position. He fed about 10 times in all from 6am yesterday to now. I'm having a hard time when it comes to times like now when I need to get my 6 yr old off to school and the baby needs to nurse. My hubby works night shift, so it's just me! I'm a RN, so I have a bit of a control freak side and i have to go back to work at 6 wks due to not having enough paid time off. My hubby has to work OT a lot also, so there's a few times during the week where he's not here in the evening either. I don't want the anxiety to overwhelm me, but I feel like I'm failing my family. Are these feelings normal?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    10,440

    Default Re: Anxiety!

    Yes,it's normal Adjusting to more kids is a big deal. I find it a leap every time we have one myself, and we are at four now.

    Do you have a sling or wrap? If so, tuck baby in it while you get your older child off to school, then kick back and relax and nurse

    If baby is doing well, you can stop waking baby to nurse
    Susan
    Mama to my all-natural boys: Ian, 9-4-04, 11.5 lbs; Colton, 11-7-06, 9 lbs, in the water; Logan, 12-8-08, 9 lbs; Gavin, 1-18-11, 9 lbs; and an angel 1-15-06
    18+ months and for Gavin, born with an incomplete cleft lip and incomplete posterior cleft palate
    Sealed for time and eternity, 7-7-93
    Always babywearing, cosleeping and cloth diapering. Living with oppositional defiant disorder and ADHD. Ask me about cloth diapering and sewing your own diapers!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    20,637

    Default Re: Anxiety!

    All normal! You're not failing- you're just making an enormous adjustment and you're doing it solo a lot of the time which is much, much harder than when you have help. Do you have a family member or friend or someone from your church/synogogue/mosque/temple/whatever who can come and help you out a bit when your husband is working overtime?

    I have found that preparation is the key to getting an older child off to school while caring for a baby. Before bedtime, get your older child to lay out his/her clothes for the next day and, if possible, choose a breakfast. Once he/she is asleep, make sure he/she has everything necessary for school the next day. Lunch and snacks can be made ahead and put into the fridge. Shoes and jacket can be laid out. Homework, permission slips, projects can be put into the backpack. The fewer choices and tasks you have to shepherd your older child through, the better! Oh, and you can even put the coffee and water in the machine, so that all you need to do in the morning is flip the switch.

    You're doing a great job, mama! Just keep keepin' on and you'll do fine!
    Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
    Coolest thing my little girl sang recently: "I love dat one-two pupples!"

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Location
    middle of IA
    Posts
    1,885

    Default Re: Anxiety!

    agree with PPs! hang in there!
    DS1 6/7/11
    DS2 10/29/13

    Nursing, pumping, cloth-diapering, babywearing, working professor mama with the awesomest SAHD ever.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Posts
    21

    Default Re: Anxiety!

    I am so fiercely independent it's a bit scary! It's almost like my identity. I have a little help, but it's on the weekends, so all week it's me. It's only been 9 days, so I guess I need to relax! But thats hard for me. Pretty soon I'll have to go back to work and it'll be pumping worries! Lol.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Posts
    21

    Default Re: Anxiety!

    I have an Ian and Logan as well! My oldest is Ian and little Logan is 9 days old!

  7. #7
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Location
    Shakedown St.
    Posts
    1,176

    Default Re: Anxiety!

    I felt really anxious when mine was a newborn, and I only have the one. I found that going out for a short walk around the block with the baby in a sling helped me a lot. A little fresh air and exercise can go a long way!
    K. Sophia - Mama to my little lactivore, the amazing Mr. X (11/10).

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    10,440

    Default Re: Anxiety!

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*rnmomma2012 View Post
    I have an Ian and Logan as well! My oldest is Ian and little Logan is 9 days old!
    Susan
    Mama to my all-natural boys: Ian, 9-4-04, 11.5 lbs; Colton, 11-7-06, 9 lbs, in the water; Logan, 12-8-08, 9 lbs; Gavin, 1-18-11, 9 lbs; and an angel 1-15-06
    18+ months and for Gavin, born with an incomplete cleft lip and incomplete posterior cleft palate
    Sealed for time and eternity, 7-7-93
    Always babywearing, cosleeping and cloth diapering. Living with oppositional defiant disorder and ADHD. Ask me about cloth diapering and sewing your own diapers!

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Posts
    243

    Default Re: Anxiety!

    You're in survival mode right now, so this is normal.

    (P.S. -- From experience I can say that it's better to get out of survival mode when you can. What I mean is when you're ready, examine your life and make sure you're doing the things you want in life, and change something if you're not. But don't do that during survival mode. Do that once you've settled back into work.)

  10. #10

    Default Re: Anxiety!

    Personally I found motherhood much more doable when I finally let go of unrealistic expectations. (and waht is realistic varies from mom to mom, family to family.) Especially in these early crazy weeks with a newborn, moms have got to give themselves a break. For example, would it be so bad if your older child were late to school? Being late when there is a new baby in the house is just part of life. You can all eat simple easy to prep meals, breakfast for dinner and the like. Paper plates OK for now-by breastfeeding you have done enough to save the environment. Having a couch, table or basket set aside for clean but unfolded laundry can work! Whatever corners you can cut, cut away. Know what I mean? Relax and enjoy these early weeks as much as you can. Try to take some of the pressure off, for many moms it's their own expectations that stresses them out.

    You will discover the nice thing about breastfeeding is there really is no need to count how often you nurse or how long baby nurses. You can count, if you are concerned, but it may not be necessary. Typically a newborn needs to nurse a minimum of 10-12 times in 24 hours. It may vary day to day and that is fine, if baby nurses 12 times on Sunday and 8 on Monday that may be fine. Also it need not be every such and such hours. The more typical pattern is for baby to 'cluster feed"-nurse very frequently part of the time and then take a little break.

    In these early weeks, nurse as much as baby wants (as long as it is enough) and count poops. You don't even need to count pees as long as there are enough poops. Enough poops, and you are almost certainly fine, not enough and something MAY need attention.

    Some more info if you like: Diaper log: http://www.llli.org/docs/00000000000...diaper_log.pdf
    and what to expect in the early weeks with a nursing baby: http://kellymom.com/bf/normal/newborn-nursing/

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