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Thread: Have Mastitis: Really need support & encouragement

  1. #51
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
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    Default Re: Have Mastitis: Really need support & encouragement

    What are you doing for the plugged ducts? Can you take a hot bath right now and massage the sore spots, then just go to bed with your baby next to you and nurse all night? That has cured many a stubborn clogged duct for me. Nursing works way better than pumping - in fact, pumping at work too much CAUSED a lot of clogged ducts for me, which my baby then fixed. Can you take a small manual hand pump with you in your outdoor work and at least take the edge off before you can officially pump again? I used to pump in the car all the time with just a nursing cover on over the pump. You can do this!


    You can call me JoMo!

    Mom to baby boy Joe, born 5/4/09 and breastfed for more than two and a half years, and baby girl Maggie, born 7/9/12.

  2. #52
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    Mar 2012
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    Default Re: Have Mastitis: Really need support & encouragement

    I usually rush straight home for a all night pumping session to clear up my plugged ducts. It takes 3+ feedings to clear up the ducts - the pump is really useless when it comes to situations like this - and the following day, I'm wandering around work half-asleep. It's an exhuasting combination of things that are causing this:

    1. I agree with you - I wholeheartedly believe I get plugged ducts because the small portable pump I use at work isn't doing an efficient job! It simply isn't draining as efficiently as the huge hospital grade pump I have at home, but having a huge pump at work isn't feasible.

    2. At home, I'm more relaxed and have more time to efficiently massage and pump my breasts. Sometimes I have pump sessions that last 20-25 minutes and get a nice 3oz total. At work, it's a miracle if I can get 10 minutes without someone knocking on the door or the phone ringing or (at one time) another female coworker simply unlocked the door and came in to ask me questions!! After I gave her a lecture about how I was not comfortable having my boobs dangling in front of her (and for anyone to see since she left the door open for a few minutes before she realized it wasn't shut), she now pesters me through the door - which... isn't really helpful either. It's stressful to know there is someone (a coworker or sometimes a client) literally pacing the door, waiting for you to finish. I'd pump for a full 10 minutes and barely get out 1 oz from both breasts.

    3. I notice if I sleep on my side, I'd wake up with lumps on that side of the breast. As a result, I'm not sleeping in this stiff no-nonsense position every night... afraid to toss and turn... afraid to curl up and get comfortable. I'd wake up completely miserable, with back aches

    I'm sorry if I'm venting a lot. It's so fustrating trying to get into a working schedule that will work for my body. The baby is doing great - if we run out of pumped breastmilk and I'm not around, she has formula as back-up... but the mother is about to go nuts trying to combat the pain and constant fright of this vicious situation. I've spoken to a few other breastfeeding mothers and this just doesn't seem to be a huge issue for them! I must be a failure at this

    I really wish to know how working mothers are handling it? Do you also have plugged ducts situations? Did you ultimately give-up on breastfeeding or were you able to make it work? I'm only back at work part-time for the moment, but what happens if I'm called back full-time? What are my options??
    Proud of Baby

  3. #53
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
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    10,440

    Default Re: Have Mastitis: Really need support & encouragement

    What pump are you using at home versus work?

    Did you know there is a small hospital grade pump I use it every day.

    I tend to clogs. A lot. It des get better once the OS resolves. And oddly, wool nursing pads helped me too.
    Susan
    Mama to my all-natural boys: Ian, 9-4-04, 11.5 lbs; Colton, 11-7-06, 9 lbs, in the water; Logan, 12-8-08, 9 lbs; Gavin, 1-18-11, 9 lbs; and an angel 1-15-06
    18+ months and for Gavin, born with an incomplete cleft lip and incomplete posterior cleft palate
    Sealed for time and eternity, 7-7-93
    Always babywearing, cosleeping and cloth diapering. Living with oppositional defiant disorder and ADHD. Ask me about cloth diapering and sewing your own diapers!

  4. #54
    Join Date
    May 2006
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    Default Re: Have Mastitis: Really need support & encouragement

    You're not a failure! You're just having an unusually difficult time. Yes, some moms do quit breastfeeding over challenges like these, but it is up to YOU whether or not you want to be one of them.

    Can you give your annoying co-worker a gentle talking-to about your need for undisturbed pumping time? She's probably just completely clueless and thinks that talking to you through the door is all she needs to do. Or you could be mean and start following her to the bathroom and asking her questions through that door. Maybe that would help her get the point that private time is PRIVATE TIME!

    I am that a better pump at work would be really helpful. If you can't buy one, maybe haul the hospital-grade monster in to work for a few weeks, until you get things sorted out more with the plugged ducts? Yes, it's a beast and I am sure you don't want to be doing that, but it's got to be better than plugged ducts and anxiety about supply.
    Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
    Coolest thing my little girl sang recently: "I love dat one-two pupples!"

  5. #55
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    Default Re: Have Mastitis: Really need support & encouragement

    You are not a failure! you are a HERO for sticking with it!!!
    DS1 6/7/11
    DS2 10/29/13

    Nursing, pumping, cloth-diapering, babywearing, working professor mama with the awesomest SAHD ever.

  6. #56
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    Default Re: Have Mastitis: Really need support & encouragement

    Thank you Ladies

    I've managed to unplug my breasts again, but it's a on again/off again war. I really want to make this continue working - I've reached 3 months (next week) and I've now extended my goal to 6 months!

    April - What is this small hospital grade pump you speak of? I really must get my hands on one of these. The woman who rent it to me did not mention a smaller model.

    I've switched to the disposable pads at the moment. The Medela rewashable ones seems to be stiff and itchy after I wash/dry them.
    Proud of Baby

  7. #57
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
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    Northern Cal.
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    Default Re: Have Mastitis: Really need support & encouragement

    Like you, I was very, very prone to clogged ducts, throughout the first six months of my nursing career (then it eased up, although I did get some clogs later when I tried to pump wean at a year - that's uncommon but some of us are just lucky). I found it helped to be VERY proactive about it. Every morning in the shower, I massaged my breasts and tried to get the milk flowing, especially looking for any sore or "full" feeling spots and working those. I did the same thing while pumping and often nursing - massage massage massage. This helped me keep the clogs from turning into mastitis after my first nasty bout with that. I also took lots of vitamin C and lecithin, just for kicks (can't hurt, right?). By six months, things were much better, although I couldn't completely let my guard down until Joe was a year old. But after six months, clogs became very infrequent and at a year or so they went away entirely and I never had them again. You can do this!!! I admire your tenacity (like you, I just stubbornly refused. to. quit. and I'm so glad now!). Hang in there!!

    P.S. How is your incision site doing?


    You can call me JoMo!

    Mom to baby boy Joe, born 5/4/09 and breastfed for more than two and a half years, and baby girl Maggie, born 7/9/12.

  8. #58
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    Mar 2006
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    Default Re: Have Mastitis: Really need support & encouragement

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*LaurenC View Post
    Thank you Ladies

    I've managed to unplug my breasts again, but it's a on again/off again war. I really want to make this continue working - I've reached 3 months (next week) and I've now extended my goal to 6 months!

    April - What is this small hospital grade pump you speak of? I really must get my hands on one of these. The woman who rent it to me did not mention a smaller model.

    I've switched to the disposable pads at the moment. The Medela rewashable ones seems to be stiff and itchy after I wash/dry them.
    Look into the Limerick. http://www.limerickinc.com/
    Susan
    Mama to my all-natural boys: Ian, 9-4-04, 11.5 lbs; Colton, 11-7-06, 9 lbs, in the water; Logan, 12-8-08, 9 lbs; Gavin, 1-18-11, 9 lbs; and an angel 1-15-06
    18+ months and for Gavin, born with an incomplete cleft lip and incomplete posterior cleft palate
    Sealed for time and eternity, 7-7-93
    Always babywearing, cosleeping and cloth diapering. Living with oppositional defiant disorder and ADHD. Ask me about cloth diapering and sewing your own diapers!

  9. #59
    Join Date
    Mar 2012
    Location
    Maryland
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    74

    Default What the heck is wrong with my family?!

    I SEE RED.

    What is wrong with my family?! I thought we were over this already! Why are they soooo determined to ruin my chances of breastfeeding?!

    I told the family I would breastfeed the baby in the morning before work, then afternoons/evenings when I am home with her.

    For some reason, MIL is DETERMINED the baby is not getting enough breastmilk when I feed her. It takes a few tries to feed the baby via breast - sometimes the baby doesn't latch on immediately... sometimes the baby feeds for a bit, then falls asleep because it's nice and warm... Long story short - it's a challenge and breastfeeding sometimes takes anywhere from 1 hour to 2 hours.

    MIL just doesn't understand the whole "feed on demand" concept. She keeps telling me I should stop giving her these mini "1-2 ounce" feedings and just hold out and let her take both breasts at one time. I tried explaining to her that it just doesn't work that way. She counters by telling me how she never seen mother's waste their time like I do... feeding the baby every 30 minutes and being chained to her non-stop. The problem is, THATS NOT TRUE. Sometimes, the baby is a champ and drinks from both breasts (within 45 minutes). Then she would be satisfied for a good 3-4 hours before she wants to eat again. The problem is, MIL would sometimes hand me the baby only 2-3 hours after formula feeding... at 5 AM - then get upset when the baby falls asleep on me mid-feeding. WHAT DO YOU EXPECT? THe baby wasn't very hungry to begin with and it's early in the morning! Let the baby sleep for another hour and maybe she'll actually take both breasts with gusto!!

    EVERYTIME I'm done breastfeeding, MIL comes over and do this "check" where she would come in and squeeze the baby's stomach. If it's not nice and round, she concludes the baby is still hungry and would run off to warm up a bottle of breastmilk. The last 2 weeks, she hasn't even bothered "checking" - she would already be standing by with a bottle of warmed up breastmilk or formula for the baby after I just fed her.

    Even when I insist she didn't want anymore, MIL would take the baby and continue to feed her. The baby would get woken up and force drink the entire bottle, before going into a satisfied coma.

    What MIL doesn't seem to understand is HOW THIS MESSES UP MY ENTIRE DAY for EB!! The baby sleeps for a good 3-5 hours and meanwhile, I'm stuck pumping every 2 hours. Then, when the baby is ready to eat again, I HAD JUST PUMPED and she isn't getting enough breastmilk...

    ...and MIL can come do her little squeeze and smugly tell me I'm not producing enough for the baby. Needless to say, my whole routine is messed up. There was almost an entire week, when I didn't even breastfeed at all. The baby was always full when I was ready to feed her - so I had to pump and pump and pump. I suffered from severe plugged ducts, my breasts were deep red and I was crying - so worried I was going to get Mastitis again.

    On top of everything, now the baby doesn't want to latch on! She is so use to grandma feeding her a bottle, when I try to introduce my nipple, she'll stare at my face, then pull away screaming.

    You have no idea how broken my heart is to see her like that. I am her MOTHER. This shouldn't happen to me! I'm crying just typing this part of the post.

    I had to spend an entire week with her, just to get her to comfortably take my breasts again.

    Meanwhile, I suppose we can just DISREGARD the fact that I got Mastitis/Abcess due to OVERPRODUCTION in the first place! This is just absolutely ridiculous.

    DH just doesn't seem to understand how much pain I am in and the exhuastion of having to wake up to pump every 2-3 hours at night. During the day, if I am not with the baby, then I am working. When HE comes home from work, he gets to play with the baby, then hand her to me if she starts crying. I'm trying to make things work, but he sides with his mother.

    Just today, MIL brought the baby over at 6am for a feeding. I had just pumped at 5am and DH was hovering worriedly over my shoulder as the baby latched on and began sucking with gusto. Determined I had already "drained" my breasts and that the baby was going to STARVE, he ran off to the kitchen to warm up a bit of breastmilk. I kept telling him not to waste breastmilk, but he wouldn't listen and returned with a full bottle.

    The breastmilk/formula I store is for emergencies only (or for the days when I am not around the baby)!! What the heck is DH's problem?! He KNOWS I have to throw out that breastmilk if she doesn't drink it in 2 hours. It's so hard for me to store this extra breastmilk... I'm trying to save enough so she can have it up until age 1.

    Do you know just how much breastmilk we've thrown out because of this stupid inability to work with me? Almost every feeding, MIL or DH would have a bottle warmed up and ready to take over when I am done breastfeeding. Sometimes I'm not even done! I just had to pee or get a sip of water and set the baby down for 5 minutes. Before I can blink, the baby is wisked away from me and fed a bottle.

    If the baby doesn't seem to want the milk, sometimes MIL would put the warmed breastmilk back into the fridge. I've told the family so many times that breastmilk/formula cannot be reheated, but nobody seems to listen to me.

    DH is completely on MIL's side. He hates my decision to breastfeed and has told me I complained too much. When I have plugged ducts and I am sitting there pumping, wishing I had the baby - instead of comforting me, he would blame me for bringing this upon myself. Nobody in the family wanted me to breastfeed - it was MY choice to get mastitis/abcess. It was my own laziness that brought upon plugged ducts. It was my own fault for not being able to fill the baby up within 30 minutes and causing the baby to be fussing for an entire morning until MIL gives her a bottle.

    Either way, he keeps reminding me that MIL had efficiently raised both him, his sister, 2 neices and a nephew. She is MORE then capable of raising our daughter.

    @)*%&((^!)%(&!%)*%!&&^_(!*%_(!#**)!%&
    STUPID STUPID STUPID STUPID STUPID!


    I can't win! I just can't win! I just want to yell and scream and cry! I can't even think straight right now - there's just so many things going on that keeps making me crazy... I don't even know how to condense my rambling thoughts to post coherently in the forums!!

    But it comes down to not having MIL or DH's support. I don't know how long I can keep this up! I really don't!
    Proud of Baby

  10. #60
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
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    middle of IA
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    Default Re: Have Mastitis: Really need support & encouragement

    oh, mama, this makes me want to yell and scream at them with you!!!

    i know it's hard, but if you want to keep breastfeeding - or being in charge of mothering your own baby - you need to have a real what they call "come to jesus" moment with your DH and your MIL. ideally you will talk to your DH and HE will handle his mom. but it seems to me that you have lost control of this situation. and you need to regain it - for your health, for your baby's health, for your sanity, for the sake of your breastfeeding relationship. because they are undermining you and right now it looks like they are winning.

    now, if this is not the battle you want to make your stake in, it's ok. lots of mamas formula feed their babies and it is ok. and the stress of life in your household is also not good for you or baby.

    but it sounds to me like breastfeeding is really important to you, so important that you haven't given up yet despite incredible challenges. and if it is still that important to you, you have to make a stand. really really soon. like this weekend. and you have to take back control of the feeding of your baby. and you have to get DH to see that the most important thing is supporting YOU, because he's married to YOU, not MIL (do you live with her? all the more important to set some boundaries).

    ultimately, i think you will need to have this fight at some point. if it's not over breastfeeding, it will be over something else. might as well make it over something that really matters to you.

    i can't remember, do you have any local support? LLL or friends who bf?

    ETA: you can re-use heated refrigerated milk for a 2nd feeding. though maybe i wouldn't tell that to DH & MIL if i were you, because they're already so wasteful wtih your precious milk.

    ETA again: i just want to reiterate: it's not that you don't have their support right now, it's that they are actively working to undermine you. this is not a healthy relationship.
    DS1 6/7/11
    DS2 10/29/13

    Nursing, pumping, cloth-diapering, babywearing, working professor mama with the awesomest SAHD ever.

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