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Thread: Help-getting no sleep

  1. #1

    Default Help-getting no sleep

    my little one is very fussy at night while feeding and afterwards. Any advice on how to get his days and nights switched? He also falls asleep in my arms and while breastfeeding but the minute I put him in his bassinet he cries and will not sleep.

    Also, how long are you supposed to feed on each breast? My 7 day old has only been feeding maybe 12-15 minutes on one side and the falls asleep and will not wake up after 7 minutes on the other side. As soon as I burp him and try to lay him down in the middle of the night he stirs and is really fussy.

    I am extremely exhausted and not sure how I can keep up with this schedule. I know breastfeeding is so important so I dont want to give up on this.

    Any advice would be great, thanks!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    10,440

    Default Re: Help-getting no sleep

    Stop watching the clock feed the baby. Start with the breast you ended with. It's possible baby isn't hungry and thus won't take all the second breast. Watch wets and poops.

    The night thing...take baby to bed and nurse. Lots. Babies can get very overwhelmed by evening, and breastfeeding will help calm them.

    It can take some weeks to get the days and nights flipped. I deal with t by wearing baby as much as possible those first few days. My last two, when I just stayed with them and went with their cues, we're straightened out within a couple weeks, even my last one. Cosleeping helps too. The second baby makes a peep, I stick them on. It was harder with the last, as we had to bottlefeed him, but we did the best we could.

    I will say this:

    IT IS NOT BECAUSE YOU ARE BREASTFEEDING THAT YOU ARE TIRED. IT IS BECAUSE YOU ARE A NEW MOTHER. EVEN IF YOU USE BOTTLES YOU WILL BE TIRED, AND EVERYONE IN THE FAMILH WILL BE TIRED. Like I said, we bottlefed the fourth by necessity, and DH was exhausted. I was exhausted. It was a nonstop cycle of feed the baby, pump, feed, wash, feed, pump, every 2 hours. Because that is how babies ARE. We knew it, because it was our fourth kid, that it was normal, but that is not how society tells a new mom it should be. But they are lying. Babies wake up. Babies cry. You should be in bed, nursing and sleeping when baby sleeps.

    It won't be like this forever. I promise.

    ETA: none of my babies slept in a bassinet. They only slept with me. Smart babies
    Susan
    Mama to my all-natural boys: Ian, 9-4-04, 11.5 lbs; Colton, 11-7-06, 9 lbs, in the water; Logan, 12-8-08, 9 lbs; Gavin, 1-18-11, 9 lbs; and an angel 1-15-06
    18+ months and for Gavin, born with an incomplete cleft lip and incomplete posterior cleft palate
    Sealed for time and eternity, 7-7-93
    Always babywearing, cosleeping and cloth diapering. Living with oppositional defiant disorder and ADHD. Ask me about cloth diapering and sewing your own diapers!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Posts
    1,110

    Default Re: Help-getting no sleep

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*aprilsmagic View Post
    Stop watching the clock feed the baby. Start with the breast you ended with. It's possible baby isn't hungry and thus won't take all the second breast. Watch wets and poops.

    The night thing...take baby to bed and nurse. Lots. Babies can get very overwhelmed by evening, and breastfeeding will help calm them.

    It can take some weeks to get the days and nights flipped. I deal with t by wearing baby as much as possible those first few days. My last two, when I just stayed with them and went with their cues, we're straightened out within a couple weeks, even my last one. Cosleeping helps too. The second baby makes a peep, I stick them on. It was harder with the last, as we had to bottlefeed him, but we did the best we could.

    I will say this:

    IT IS NOT BECAUSE YOU ARE BREASTFEEDING THAT YOU ARE TIRED. IT IS BECAUSE YOU ARE A NEW MOTHER. EVEN IF YOU USE BOTTLES YOU WILL BE TIRED, AND EVERYONE IN THE FAMILH WILL BE TIRED. Like I said, we bottlefed the fourth by necessity, and DH was exhausted. I was exhausted. It was a nonstop cycle of feed the baby, pump, feed, wash, feed, pump, every 2 hours. Because that is how babies ARE. We knew it, because it was our fourth kid, that it was normal, but that is not how society tells a new mom it should be. But they are lying. Babies wake up. Babies cry. You should be in bed, nursing and sleeping when baby sleeps.

    It won't be like this forever. I promise.

    ETA: none of my babies slept in a bassinet. They only slept with me. Smart babies


    Well said! I agree 100% don't listen to those who say "my baby sleeps through the night since he was born" it might be true but it's not the rule, it's the exception. I also never used a bassinet, my babies sleep with me and that's how I get all the sleep I can get. I sleep skin to skin for at least the first 6 weeks of their lives and then just nurse and put them right next to me.

    If we were living in the middle of the jungle, no one would even think about not breastfeeding, they would assume that's what a mother has to do, it's natural, even if right now it doesn't seem natural. Babies need to nurse to grow and at 7 days, oh boy, they nurse very often! But as pp said, it's not forever, very soon you'll be sleeping better, of course, as everything with kids and babies, nothing is forever, not even for those that have babies that sleep through the night, it can always change.

    As pp says, don't look at the watch, my babies nurse in less than 5 minutes on one side, I would say even less than 3 minutes sometimes (but I don't look at the clock so I don't really know ) You'll find that some feedings are longer than others, that's because some feedings are main meals and some are just snacks. Just like we do :P

    My suggestion, co-sleep and enjoy that tiny little baby, they really grow too fast! Every night before I go to bed, I look at DD3 while she is sleeping next to me, I fall asleep with that image

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Posts
    5,424

    Default Re: Help-getting no sleep

    "sleep when baby sleeps" is not quaint advice, it is an important new motherhood survival tactic. This means you will be catnapping during the day and night and not getting long sleep stretches, likely for some time to come. Your body will adjust somewhat to this sleep pattern, but yes, new motherhood/parenthood means being really, really tired, more tired than you have ever been in your life, ever. It gets better. Bedsharing really helps many moms, if that is an option, look into how to do so safely.

    Newborn babies need to eat frequently throughout the 24 hour day, so they have to eat through the night, they are not switched or confused, this is normal. Over time, baby will likely naturally begin to take a longer sleep stretch at night, but even true 'sleeping through the night" which will likely not happen for many weeks yet, is defined as only a 5 hour stretch of sleep.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Posts
    106

    Default Re: Help-getting no sleep

    My first child had reflux and slept in his carseat (to keep him elevated) until he was 4mths then he went into a crib. while I was pregnant with our daughter I decided that she would not sleep in or bed either. Well...that lasted a whole 2 hours our first night home. I rocked her until she was VERY asleep and layed her down in her bassinet. She woke up. Repeated this process a few times and each time she woke up. I was so exhausted after being in labor all night one night.....and then my next night after she was born my nose was really stuffy and couldn't sleep. I finally broke down and put her in bed with us and that is where she has been ever since. We have a 3 year old also so I can't nap during the day like I would like. So my nights are important! I always thought co-sleeping was dangerous until I looked into it. It can be done safely and is a life saver for me.

    Also, during the day, sleep when LO does. Your supply/sanity depends on you resting. If you have a friend or family member that can come over one day and take care of baby while you sleep....it is wonderful! Just have them bring baby to you when they are showing signs of hunger or 3 hours, which ever comes first. Hope you get some much needed rest!

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Dec 2011
    Location
    Oregon
    Posts
    51

    Default Re: Help-getting no sleep

    I agree with PP.

    My guy had evening fussiness until 2 to 3 months old. It is referred to as
    "the witching hour".

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