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Thread: Completely overwhelmed...

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
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    33

    Default Completely overwhelmed...

    Let me start off by stating that I am sure there will be many spelling and grammar errors, I don't have the energy to proof read and correct right now. I am a FTM, My son is 5.5 months, very sensitive to multiple foods, has silent (but I can hear it) reflux (wrote a post on here b4 about this but will probably get into it some more again), has torticollis, is teething (making reflux much worse) and fights falling asleep (sweat and tears involved in this process most of the time con count on 1 hand the time he hasn't screamed when trying to get him to sleep), oh yes, I believe he is working on a growth spurt as well (nursing more often). I am so overwhelmed right now with all of this. I have cut out many things in my diet, to name a few; wheat, dairy, eggs, many vegetables, some fruits, chocolate, pepper, tomatoes and caffeine well I could go on but...) I have a hard time eating and getting nutrients I should. Since he is teething his reflux (he is on Zantac) has flaired up so much and has been so fussy but I dont know if it is from teething, reflux or upcomming growth spurt... My brain is fried, I am mentally and physically drained-- my arms are so tired.... I hold him most of the day he takes his naps on me so therefore I can't always get up and get food when I want or even pee when I need to... We have been working on his naps and he is starting to let me put him in swing to get him to sleep just a few times now. It breaks my heart that he has reflux and I don't let him just cry I do whatever I can to keep him from crying. He LOVES to get out of the house and so do I but it is si difficult because he hates the carseat- only when he is sleepy though because As I already mentioned he fights sleep- and since he doesn't sleep well in the day he always seems sleepy especially in the car so he screams his heady off-- I'm talking serious screaming.... Anyways I already hold him often and I feed on demand I am getting worn slap out right now because he is eating often- I can't say how often because I have lost all concept of time since having him and I rarely look at clock, I just know its often.... And to top it off he has congenital muscular torticollis (certain Neck muscles are tight and cause head to tilt one way and can cause miss happen head which his is slightly) which is tough on him too. I know these are not all issues with breastfeeding (well actually every single one makes it more and more challenging) but I wasn't sure where to write and I just needed to write because I dont have anyone around me who understand the stress I believe. Thank you for listening! We are off to bed (I discovered letting him sleep with me makes it much easier at night since he eats multi x at night) he is already asleep so now I will attempt to carry him in there w/o waking him! Again thanks!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
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    429

    Default Re: Completely overwhelmed...

    Wow! Ok I am so glad I just read this because I think I can help!!! I am actually going through and have gone through most of this too! Isn't that crazy? First off I'll start with the Torticollis. My first daughter A1 had congenital muscular torticollis which resulted in plagiociphally to the point that she *almost* had to have a helmet. Luckily we caught it soon enough and were able to correct it with extensive physically therapy. Which was sooooo hard but so worth it. So do you have him in therapy? I would assume so since you know about it already. If not then get him in asap, it will help him so much I promise. It takes time but WORKS!
    Now onto the sleeping. BOY do I know where you are coming from!!! DD2, A2 is almost 5 months and she does NOT sleep. And she screams just like you said, SCREAMS her head off no matter what I do. Bounce, rock, sing, sway, hold still, bouncer, swing, wear, whatever. She screams. She also has acid reflux sometimes silent sometimes not. Quite severely. And nurses all night it feels like. She wakes up every hour if not more. She doesn't sleep with me but sleeps right next to me in her crib. I just sleep better that way. Anyway. She is on Zantac as well. And just recently she was put on another medicine that helps her digest faster. She was put on it as a last resort. It seems to be helping a bit with sleeping but she is fussier during the day so I am talking to her ped about it on tuesday. Anyway. First I'll say, have you read The No Cry Sleep Solution by Elizabeth Pantley? It may work for you. So far it didn't work for us. I think she is in pain too much for her to fall asleep normally. BUT recently this is what I have been trying. I figure she cries in my arms as much as she cries in her crib so (even though it about kills me) I let her cry in her crib for 2 minutes. Yup that's it. 2 minutes. Then I go in, comfort and reassure and then let her cry 2 more minutes then I pick her up and get her to sleep. Just these 4 minutes seem to "tire" her out enough to fall asleep without a fuss with rocking and then I lay her down. Really this is probably not the best but I have literally tried EVERYTHING else to get her to sleep. Everything. You should see my previous posts. Seriously. So hey if you haven't done that it's worth a shot. Also I did a bunch of eliminating of foods and it made no difference after 3 months so I went back on, know what? The same. So if you haven't noticed a huge difference with your eliminations then go back on the foods. I dunno if that's the best advice but it's what I think. It would make your life a whole lot easier. I'm here for you for sure. Hang in there! I'll hang with you. PM me if you'd like to talk more Sounds like we are in the same boat and tryin to bail out and stay a float!
    Melissa

    Young SAHM of
    Afton (A1) (1/24/09) and
    Autumn (A2) (8/29/11)

    Sealed in the SLC Temple

    and and now CDing!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Posts
    33

    Default Re: Completely overwhelmed...

    Thanks for the reply, yes he has been in PT since 3 months (should have been sooner but it wasn't set up till then- still mad about it). We have also been taking him to Chiropractor for about 1 month now- I stare at him all day so it's hard for me to notice small improvements if that makes sense oh the pr mentioned something about the TOT collar when he gets a lil more neck- I'm dreading it because I KNOW he will hate it. I don't ever feel like I'm stretching him enough, not sure if I need to more or if I really do enough. Anyways I have found that the moby wrap has been the key to get him to sleep because he will fall asleep in it without notice but that really becomes difficult because I still can't do much anything and I def can't take him out or he will wake up. And needless to say my body gets tired but I do love to babywear, just getting worn out. I actually bought that book but havent read it- I guess I'm so convince nothing will work- but I need to read and find out. I am lucky in that he does sleep sound at night even though he wakes to eat he is sleeping well and stays half asleep when he nurses. If there was room in my room I'd put his crib by my bed because he is tossing and turning more and I would like him to have more room to do so but havent figured a way to arrange it so it would fit. I did try to reintroduce things back into diet (wheat most recently which actually made me feel like crap) but his reflux got worse everytime. I think his Zantac has helped the pain alot but since he is refluxing so much right now I get concerned that some of his fussiness might be due to pain from that instead of teeth. Thanks again and I'm sure ill pm u sometime to chat, espescialy about the torticollis)

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Aug 2011
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    256

    Default Re: Completely overwhelmed...

    , mama. What you describe sounds so difficult! I don't have any helpful suggestions, but I just want to say that I had a difficult time getting my DS to sleep for a long, long time. Hours and hours of walking, singing, bouncing, babywearing... I remember not being able to eat or use the bathroom because DS had to be held in order to sleep. He wouldn't sleep in the carseat, just screamed a lot, hated the swing, and would only tolerate the bouncy chair for tiny periods of time if someone was right there. Sometimes I had to set him down and let him wake up or cry so I could use the bathroom. It's not easy at all! Things will get better. Just maximize your and his sleep if you can, and it sounds like you are doing just that! Also, around 3 months, I switched from my Moby to a Pikkolo, because it was easier for me to get DS in and out of it. Plus, with elastic-waisted pants, I could use the bathroom and not disturb him too much if he was asleep But I just wanted to say that it sounds like you are doing awesome, and it will get better!
    First time mom to DS, born 2/21/2011.

    due with #2 6/26/2014

    Currently , .

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
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    429

    Default Re: Completely overwhelmed...

    Ya I hated stretching A1's neck. It was Awful. She'd scream the whole time. I found I would just have to tune out and do it. I'd do each of the stretches and count each one however long I was supposed to hold it. I'd close my eyes and just count. I think being really strict with the stretching helps a lot. Once my grandma saw me stretching A1's neck and she said I was torturing my child. I about exploded at her because I was trying to do what was best for A1 and it was soooooooo hard so I didn't need her crap haha. She apologized later. But still made me mad. We also found lots of tummy time helped her neck work itself out. She screamed the whole time pretty much but we did it. Rolling up a receiving blanket and putting it under her chest helped a bit. With A2 I've been like insane about tummy time as much as possible and watching her neck so hard for any signs of it. So far she seems fine (knock on wood!) I know how you feel about not noticing differences. I'd always wait for her head measurments and neck flexibility readings from the therapist to know if she was improving.
    Melissa

    Young SAHM of
    Afton (A1) (1/24/09) and
    Autumn (A2) (8/29/11)

    Sealed in the SLC Temple

    and and now CDing!

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Posts
    466

    Default Re: Completely overwhelmed...

    mama, i'm sorry you're going through so much all at once. i only have some advice on the food issue. i'm also on a partial elimination diet (no dairy, soy, nuts/tree nuts, or gluten/wheat), and i also find myself hungry without always being able to go to the kitchen and make something to eat. it's hard to find practical, ready-to-eat foods that fit the diet. so i wanted to share a few that have worked for me. these are all handy enough that you can spread them around your house so you can always have something nearby:

    - Enjoy Life is a brand of hypoallergenic food, and it makes all sorts of chewy and crunchy cookies, which are very yummy, and also some bars (like apple, chocolate, sunbutter), which are not that yummy but still filling. They also have cereals, some are very good
    - Pamela's Bites gingerbread cookies are gluten-free and dairy-free
    - Apples and pears make for an easy snack
    - Fruit juices are a quick way for me to get some energy
    - Terra chips for something savory
    - NuGo Free energy bars, i eat the chocolate flavor which i know you can't, but they have a carrot cake flavor
    - Oskri coconut bars, it's only coconut and rice syrup

    I also always make a big pot of rice pudding with rice milk + coconut milk and leave it in the fridge, and it's easy enough to scoop up some for quick energy. I use brown rice.

    i hope this helps even if a little! it's no fun being hungry when you're breastfeeding and dealing with so much else.

    PS. for my baby i had to cut off all gluten, not just wheat. that includes barley, rye, regular oatmeal (there's certified gluten-free oatmeal, like Glutenfreeda) and some other grains.
    march 2011... the light of my life

    i love my little one

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
    Posts
    73

    Default Re: Completely overwhelmed...

    I know how you feel because my baby is the same exact way...Things are definitely better now because I also read The No Cry Sleep Solution and believe it or not her methods really do work. It takes some time but you will get results, even if they are minor. He is now able to nap in his crib instead of in the carrier. Also, his crying is still excessive but definately less than when he was younger. I do believe that elimination diets work to improve fussiness but with my son I noticed tiny improvements and I didnt feel it was worth the stress of feeling malnourished and hungry all day despite preparing snacks and meals before hand (which in itself is exhausting). What helps the most is going out for an activity. Luckily I live in FL so it allows for plenty of time outdoors and I find that he fights his naps much less when I give him intense stimulation followed by a calming routine. I do believe that my son is fussy due to his reflux and food sensitivities but I also believe he is in general a very high need baby. He nurses constantly and needs constant attention and stimulation. This is very difficult to do when there are house chores to be done but I find that if I devote a good hour and a half to intense stimulation he sleeps better and allows me to have time to myself... (my son also abhores the carseat unless im singing and playing with him in the backseat while someone else drives so we do things locally like going to the park/pool/walks). This time WILL pass...try and surround yourself with loving and supportive people who can sympathize with you and help you in any way possible. Other moms generally dont understand how truly difficult it is unless they also have a high need reflux baby so I tend to avoid mommy and me types of activities because it frustrates me more than it distracts. Anyway good luck and hopefully things will start to lighten up soon!

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