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Thread: How long is too long?

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Dec 2011
    Location
    Sonoma, CA
    Posts
    15

    Default How long is too long?

    My DD is 4 months old yesterday. BF was a hard task to come by, but she loves now, so that's good. At 6 weeks she was diagnosed with Reflux, and I gave her one dose a day (it was prescribed twice daily), and she seemed to do pretty well.

    She has always been a long nurser, and my guess is most of her time at the breast was for comfort. Much to the chagrin of others, I continued to let her feed on demand, and stay on as long as she wanted. I returned to work the week before Thanksgiving, and her feedings became shorter, usually 20 mins on each side.

    I've been home for 3 weeks (I'm a teacher), and the first 2 weeks were great. She was getting into a routine, finally taking 2-3 naps per day, and sleeping from about 8pm to 6am at night. With the holidays here, family visiting, of course ouf newfound routine was been completely screwed up! Over the last couple of days, she has been nursing for upwards of an hour on each side, and if I attempt to put her down when I think she's fallen asleep, she wakes right up screaming and very angry and the only way to calm her is to nurse her again.

    Needless to say, naps have been pretty non-existant, unless she is in my arms, which doesn't make for a very sound sleep for her. Friends and family tell me I should limit her time to like 15 mins per side and then just set her down, that I should start COI methods so my child doesn't "run" me - obviously I don't feel very comfortable about that, but I would like to be able to get some stuff down throughout the day.

    My question is, what is the "appropriate" length of time to nurse at each setting? Any opinions would be very much appreciated!

    Proud mommy to
    Ava

    since 9/3/11
    since 11/14/11
    and working on
    and more frequently!


  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Posts
    6,564

    Default Re: How long is too long?

    I have always nursed on demand in terms of how often and how long - and my second child is just about a year. I don't think there's any reason to limit a baby to 15 minutes, and in fact it could be detrimental. She may be going through a growth spurt. Also, for the record, I am adamantly against cry-it-out, but the doctors that recommend it don't recommend it until 6 months at the earliest. So she's too young for that.

    Maybe her teeth have started coming in or something else is troubling her. The only thing you can count on with sleep for the first year or so is that it is always changing.
    Tracie

    Mommy to
    Lilah 10/08 nursed 25 months
    Beatrix 01/11 nursed 30 months

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Posts
    6,564

    Default Re: How long is too long?

    You know, it could be the reflux. Have you thought about giving her the recommended dosage of meds?
    Tracie

    Mommy to
    Lilah 10/08 nursed 25 months
    Beatrix 01/11 nursed 30 months

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Posts
    151

    Default Re: How long is too long?

    4 month sleep regression? I have found this surprisingly accurate with my lo:

    http://www.askmoxie.org/2009/03/a-re...gressions.html

    http://www.askmoxie.org/2007/10/4-month-olds.html
    Kate

    Mother to a sweet boy, born at 34 weeks on 2/11/11.
    Proud that I grew 26 lbs of baby before solids, and still counting...

    We received banked milk in the NICU. Thank you, donors!!!

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Aug 2011
    Posts
    169

    Default Re: How long is too long?

    yeah, I was thinking 4 month sleep regression as well....the other thing is i hear reflux babies like to be upright? Maybe try having her nap on an incline...better yet, try out babywearing if you haven't already--she gets to be close to mommy, and you can get things done while she sleeps--the motion might help her sleep better than just 'in arms'. I wouldn't recommend limiting her time at the breast...she could just be a slow nurser, but as she gets more experienced nursing, she will most likely get more efficient at nursing. Or she could be nursing for as long as she is because it's soothing to her reflux troubles. I'm sorry your friends and family are giving you advice that goes against your instincts--you're right on target with your instincts, if you ask me! It can be tough to just brush off those comments, especially being a first time mom, but babies need their mommies for so many reasons--I think it's unwise to try and assume that we as adults know better than our individual babies.
    First time mommy to Anika Jo, born 6/27/11 at home
    Love to , and . Cloth diapering full time, and part-time ECing-- my baby pees and poos in her little pink potty!
    I blog: www.the-whole-life.blogspot.com

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    COUGARTOWN Baby! From here on in!
    Posts
    17,439

    Default Re: How long is too long?

    If I was working when my son was 4 months old I would have just sat there and held him all of Christmas break. Because you had to go back this week right? And you will be away all day again? I bet a lot of it was 4month restlessness. But you guys will be back to beginning and end of the day this week right? So why not just roll with it for the one week and work on your new normal once you have returned to work?

    Way too lazy for formula

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Dec 2011
    Location
    Sonoma, CA
    Posts
    15

    Default Re: How long is too long?

    @djs.mom - I like the way you think! She most definitely has been in my arms all 2.5 weeks so far! It seemed to happen this way when I first went back too...the 5 days or so leading up to my leaving she was a screeching mess! Yes, I will just ride it out the rest of this week - I return back to work on Tuesday.

    @mommy2lilah - It may be the reflux back or never fully resolved. I know when we started the meds, the dr. told me to use it for about a month, and I have no refills. This Monday we go in for 4 month check up and shots...guess I'll have lots of questions for our new pediatrician! You would be surprised though, as we've seen 3 different doctors who (starting at 5 weeks) told me I just had a colicky baby and since she was going to just cry anyway to put her down, let her cry and go have a glass of wine. (So thankful to my IBCLC who set me on the right track and helped reinstate my confidence as a mom!)

    Thank you also for the links about sleep regression...I had not heard of this before. Lord help me! I think I will just enjoy the last few days we have together and nurse as much and as long as she wants! She's only going to be this small for so long....I have to take advantage of our precious time together!

    Many thanks LLLadies!

    Proud mommy to
    Ava

    since 9/3/11
    since 11/14/11
    and working on
    and more frequently!


  8. #8
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
    Posts
    429

    Default Re: How long is too long?

    You may have to have her dose of meds upped as well because she is bigger now. That's what just happened with my LO

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