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Thread: Feeding for longer than a year? Advice?

  1. #11
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    Default Re: Feeding for longer than a year? Advi

    gosh, I'm even more confused now. I was told around 6 months by my health visitor that I need only keep up 3 feeds a day and now I'm down to 2, one in am before breakfast and one at night. Could I actually move these feeds and still feed her so it's less structured? Would it be confusing for her?
    The annoying thing is, that if I want to perform in any shows over the next year there's about a 2-3month rehearsal period that I'd need to be available for, so I have to plan in advance i I'm going to wean her. I just don't see how I'd feed her and do rehearsals and shows unless she just fed whenever she fancied and if I wasn't there, it wouldn't matter?
    If I wanted to be in the next show, it's already started rehearsing and the show's in May. I'm trying hard not to think about the fact that that means I won't perform until at least September...

  2. #12
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    Default Re: Feeding for longer than a year? Advi

    If she has only been nursing three times a day, what else has she been eating? Formula? Does she nurse at night? Is that 3 feeds in 24 hours?

  3. #13
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    Default Re: Feeding for longer than a year? Advi

    Good questions from the PP. 2-3 feeds per 24 hours would be at the very, very low end, particularly for a baby who is less than 1 year old. My pediatrician has always told me that until a year the baby's primary source of nutrition should be breastmilk or formula, not solids. So a baby who was nursing just 3 times a day at 6 months would need to be supplemented with formula. I'm not saying this to make you feel bad- i just want you to have the information for the future, in case you have more kids or encounter another mom who has gotten the same poor advice from a HV. (Seriously, what is up with these HVs? So many mamas from the UK and Canada come here with all kinds of crazy advice that they've been given by a HV.)

    You can absolutely move those 2 feeds a day to different times and make the whole thing less structured, or more structured, depending on what works for you and your LO. Babies are flexible, and they can learn to accept change in their routine. It isn't always easy, but it can always be done. The flexibility of toddler nursing is part of it's beauty. When a baby is less than a year old, and is really relying on mom for nutrition (or should be- sorry, I don't mean to salt a wound), mom is really tied to her baby and it's hard to shift the baby's feeding routine around or to skip nursing sessions. But after a year- you could nurse 3 times on Monday and then just once on Tuesday, or not at all, and then go back to nursing 3 times a day on Wednesday. You could use the breast as a tantrum-soother when you're with the baby and let the caregiver figure out how to soothe baby when you're not there. I have a feeling that because you've become accustomed to highly scheduled nursing, you're thinking that it has to be that way...? And it doesn't. After a year, you just enjoy the flexibility.
    Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
    Coolest thing my little girl sang recently: "I love dat one-two pupples!"

  4. #14
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    Default Re: Feeding for longer than a year? Advi

    Ita with mommal

  5. #15
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    Mar 2010
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    Default Re: Feeding for longer than a year? Advi

    I also had a very rough start with bf and planned to stop at 1 year when I returned to work. I've put in a second year with my twins and am so glad I did. I know I've given them as much as I can in that regard. Things can be much more flexible as babies get older as these other moms have said. All that aside, I also know plenty of moms whose kids quit nursing around or even before 1 year and after all I've experienced I would never tell anyone to keep nursing if they are done. It has to feel right to you. I obviously was still conflicted at one year and now at two years I know we can be done--I feel calm and confident with my decision, which, if I trust myself, usually means I'm making positive choices.

  6. #16
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    Nov 2011
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    Default Re: Feeding for longer than a year? Advi

    In my area it seems to be ok to bf 2/3 times in 24 hours without formula. She's on solids, we're doing the baby-led weaning, so 3 meals a day, 2 milk feeds, one in the korning before breakfast and one lst thing at night and that's it.

    Gosh this is such a tricky subject. I really value all your help and advice!

    My little lady turned 1 today. I'm still thinking really hard about this all. I'm interested in the fact I could move her feeds around and not have a structure every day that's the same, but a bit worried about how to do it? I'm not sure I'd know when she wanted feeds if they were at other times of the day because she doesn't show signs of wanting a feed that a newborn would? We've tried sign language (the sign for milk etc), and she sometimes repeats it but hasn't understood she can use it to ask for milk. How else would I know? I don't think at this stage I'd up the number of feeds as I have fibromyalgia (can't remember if I mentioned this, lol) and that includes a lot of fatigue. I wouldn't want to have more fatigue and not be able to manage being with her all day etc.

    Also, she's developed this habit at bedtime of going on for a few mins then walking around the room for 20, on for 2, the same for over an hour and then she settles down to about a 15 minute feed near the end which is about 8.30 pm!! Any advice?
    Last edited by @llli*pinkpumps9876; January 9th, 2012 at 01:31 PM.

  7. #17
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    Default Re: Feeding for longer than a year? Advi

    I always just let my child set the feeds and times, but after 1, if I didn't want to nurse, I would distract or give a snack.

    Three feeds a day is on the low end for sure, especially at this age. A lot of babies show a renewed interest in the breast around one. That said, if she's getting plenty of dairy products and maybe some whole milk, at one you can feel good about her getting ANY breastmilk. I hear that you have health issues, I must say, nursing my toddler was one of the more relaxing things we did together! It wasn't nearly as draining or exhausting as the CONSTANT CHASING OMG. Just something to think about.


    You can call me JoMo!

    Mom to baby boy Joe, born 5/4/09 and breastfed for more than two and a half years, and baby girl Maggie, born 7/9/12.

  8. #18
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    Nov 2011
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    Default Re: Feeding for longer than a year? Advi

    Hi everyone. Thanks for all this advice. I've decided after much deliberation, and recent extra exhaustion, to stop the morning feed and keep up the bedtime feed a few more months. At least this way, she is still having the benefits of the breastmilk but I get to have a bit more energy, (I hope). I'll be substituting whole milk and then breakfast for the feed. I hope it goes ok. I'll start this weekend when my hubby is at home to support me.

    Has anyone ever had problems cutting a feed off at this age? I hope having said that, there's not too many horror stories!!

  9. #19
    Join Date
    May 2006
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    Default Re: Feeding for longer than a year? Advi

    Weaning from a feeding can be easy or it can be hard, depending on how attached a baby is to that particular feeding. Often the last feedings to go are the ones before bedtime or nap time, since many babies use the breast to soothe themselves to sleep. If your LO is reluctant to drop the feeding, here are some tips that might help:
    - Distraction. Get her up and busy or even out of the house ASAP.
    - Feed her- give her a sippy of milk and/or a selection of favored food items.
    - Avoid her. When baby sees mommy, she thinks "nurse!". When she sees daddy or grandma, she thinks "play". If you can avoid her until she is really engaged in her day, and shift her care onto a non-nursing family member, you have a better chance of skipping the feeding.
    - Avoid your favorite nursing spot. When baby sees you sit down in your nursing chair, or wherever, she thinks "nurse". Avoid the favorite location, and you may avoid triggering the thought.
    - Be prepared to hear some screaming. But remember that you do not need to give in. Weaning is not always a "no cry" event, but that doesn't mean it's necessarily bad or wrong to wean.
    - Be prepared to be flexible. Weaning is a process, and you may not be able to drop the feeding right away, even if you want to. With my first kid, I kept trying to drop the first morning feeding, but the moment she saw me she wanted to nurse. Basically, at first all I managed to do was to shift the first morning feeding until later in the day- but that was still an important part of breaking the "waking up = nursing" association my daughter had.

    Good luck!
    Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
    Coolest thing my little girl sang recently: "I love dat one-two pupples!"

  10. #20
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    N.W.
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    Default Re: Feeding for longer than a year? Advi

    Thanks for this advice. She's taking to things quite well, but isn't drinking too much whole milk. I'm sure she'll get used to it.

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