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Thread: in much need of advice and support!FAST!

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Posts
    27

    Exclamation in much need of advice and support!FAST!

    Where to even begin... my 10 month old son (ds#2) is highly allergic to many foods, restricting my diet tremendously. I too have many food allergies which further limits what i can eat. as a result, i made the decision that i would stick it out with nursing until he's a yr, eventhough i nursed my ds#1 til 19 mo. it has been an extremely frustrating and difficult road and eventhough i know it would be better if i could continue nursing for longer, it's just too much already. im not getting into all the allergies now bc thats not my main concern, but feel free to ask.

    my son has been eating pureed foods, fruits and veggies, and has been really getting into table food lately, inlcluding chicken, i havent tried beef yet. i really want to wean him by a yr bc im getting frustrated often, am only enjoying it some of the time, and am unhappy a lot of the time. i also miss having a variety of food to eat!

    ds used to be a decent sleeper but started waking frequently at abt 7 mo, beginning to teeth no doubt. he has become a frequent night nurser which only adds to the equation. he hardly lets my husband comfort him in middle of the night, meaning i have to nurse him back to sleep almost every time he wakes up, which can happen as often as 30 min to an hour. he does sleep in his own room, but by 11-12pm/am i usually take him into bed with us because im too tired to sit in the rocking chair with him until he falls asleep, and stays asleep! the problem is, when he is in my bed, pretty much nursing allllllllllllllll night, i dont sleep.

    my solution was that since i wanna work on weaning, lets start with night time since its the hardest and takes the longest. so i thought id choose a block of time, between 11pm and 4-5 am where i would not nurse him. he could nurse as much as he wanted til 11, and then not until 5-6 hours later, he nurses a lot during the day and eats, so i figured he wouldnt be hungry. the first 2 nights were terrible, but my dh and i were up with him, hugging, cuddling, kissing, and giving him all the love we could. the third night he slept in my bed for that whole chunk of time, but then after that it was hit or miss. after two weeks of this experiment, i gave up because he was not getting used to it and my hubby and i were getting sooooo tired from being up for hours with him crying. now that ive gone back to nursing whenever, i still dont sleep because when he nurses all night im constantly aware that he's there and never enter deep stage sleep.

    my questions are:
    1. was that just a terrible idea to start working on night weaning? i so badly want to be done by a year that i feel pressure from myself to really get the ball going. if it were up to him he wouldnt stop any time soon, but im falling apart without sleep and ill need to do it eventually, so why not now?

    2. ive read and used elizabeth pantly's ncss techniques, but at this point im just too tired to implement strategies. how can i keep my ds from waking every hour every night, and replace his need to nurse to sleep with something else?

    3. how should i approach daytime nursing sessions,which are basically every 3 hours.

    4. how do other entirely exhausted moms feel abt night nursing and weaning? am i the only one who doesnt feel some amt of sleep is being achieved by nursing in bed?

    aside from being tired and frustrated, my ds is also bruising my nips a lot due to teething and that only makes me more resentful and only makes me want to wean soon more than ever! im commited to a yr, but really a yr, i dont want him to be 15-16 mo old and im still nursing. he is so allergic than any slight trace of allergens in my milk makes him sooooooooooooooooooooo refluxy and vomity, as well as causes his skin to be covered in eczema. so there's no cheating possible.
    help!
    supermom2008, mom to 2 beautiful boys, my oldest just turned 3 yesterday (10/15/08) and my baby, bore 12/15/10.
    currently off dairy, eggs, wheat, soy, corn, chickpeas, sesame, avocado, potato, oats, barley (really all gluten), buckwheat, brown rice, broccoli, sunflower seeds (ie sunbutter), and many of the gluten free flours including potato starch, tapioca starch, corn starch, sorghum flour, arrow root (only can have very small quantities)

  2. #2

    Default Re: in much need of advice and support!F

    I'm struggling with night weaning as well - and I completely sympathize with you. Some of the things that have worked for me (some of the time, anyway) is encouraging a lovey, some sort of security object that you always have with you when you nurse, and if you can have Dad take over some of the nighttime responsibilities, that helps too. Not immediately nursing sometimes works as well - I've found that sometimes I can just shush my DD and rub her back and sometimes she settles without needing to latch on. With my DS, my DH took over putting him to bed, and that helped with the nursing to sleep habit.

    Weaning was really a struggle with my DS, and I'm really, really hoping that it's easier this time around.
    Melissa
    mom to Jessica (2/7/03 - nursed eight months)
    Samuel (7/6/06 - nursed three and half years) and
    Julianna (4/29/10 - still happily nursing)

    http://www.melissaannecohen.com/

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Posts
    27

    Default Re: in much need of advice and support!F

    thanks for your response! ive been trying with several lovies over the months and he has not been interested in more than holding it and throwing it on the floor and rubbing me or my shirt or whatever! my older son never became attached either,but ive really tried. we've tried to delay the nursing too, but it just ends up being one of us holding him crying for a while til i just say oh forget it lemme nurse!!! .......... plus im soooooooooooooooooo sore in the morn from the whole night 1

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Location
    In Peace
    Posts
    2,923

    Default Re: in much need of advice and support!F

    I think that the easiest way to totally wean would be to start with the session he is least interested in, be it night or day. Have you checked out the allergy section yet?

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Posts
    27

    Default Re: in much need of advice and support!F

    thanks...yea i realized i i'm facing an uphill battle! ive been working on the daytime more. over the last 2 weeks, my ds has shown an increased interest in the food i'm eating and has increased what he eats during the day. i also decided that since he wakes up so frequently from the minute he goes to sleep for the night, and when he wakes he just wants to nurse, i don't nurse him unless it's been at least 3 hours. otherwise i just rock him to sleep or my husband tries if he's home (he works at night sometimes), until i go to bed. once im in bed and he wakes ill take him in, though soon im gonna work on keeping him in his crib too. ugghhh weaning stinks!

    i have checked out the allergy forums, though i don't get to spend time reading too often!!!

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Oct 2011
    Location
    Middle of nowhere in Ohio
    Posts
    121

    Default Re: in much need of advice and support!F

    I could have written what you wrote! Except for the allergy part. My son would eat every 3 hrs until about 9 mos. Even at night he would wake every 3 hrs. I found out he was teething 6 teeth! When they teeth sometimes nursing is all they have to feel better and they want their mom! I know it is hard especially when you are lacking sleep. I have been there! You can try to up the food intake during the day and introducing a sippy with a soft top with some sort of liquid, I use water. That might help with the thirst. Now my DS is down to 4-5 b/t nursings and 7-9 hs at night between feeds. The LLL book has good suggestions on avoiding places you usually sit to nurse and such. Once they into a routine it is hard to break it.
    Passed my CLC exam!

    Mother of 3: 12-25-04 12-3-07 1-13-2011

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Posts
    27

    Default Re: in much need of advice and support!F

    Thx for ur reply...we r getting into a pretty good routine. I nurse five times including the early morning Feeding. I try to pump at least 1xday to get him used to having a bottle instead of me, and that gives me a little break. I know he's teething so badly. I can see the makings of teeth on the top and bottom. I use the hylands teething gel and that jelps temporarily until he wakes up again. He does drink from a dippy cup, either the avent or the playtex straw cups, but in middle of the nite he wants ME!! I really feel the need to wean him already bc I'm so limited on what I can eat but I know it's just going to be a slow process...

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