Oh mama. How frustrating. Great advice has been given. I can understand where you're coming from on this matter. I constantly feel like my IL's are disrespecting me by not following my rules/directions when we allow them to watch our children (although they're a bit older now, and it seems to be getting better). One time in particular that stands out to me is from when my ds1 was about 2.5 months old. DH and I were going out for our anniversary brunch, and MIL and FIL begged to watch Liam for a couple hours, so we agreed. I told them to give him ONLY what was in the bag, which was a full bottle (probably about 6 or 8 oz of EBM), and when we got back they said he had the entire thing (which I believed), and he was still hungry (which I didn't believe, since I'd just fed him before dropping him off). How and why they thought this, I'll never know. Because he was the most pleasant baby, almost never cried,etc. Anyway, if I'm remembering correctly, they said they didn't give him anything else but, his onesie had an awful lot of something sticky on it. I didn't even ask because I would've most likely been livid with their answer, and decided it was better not to start a huge deal with them.... But I still get super angry thinking about it. Oh yeah, they also thought it was appropriate to give him a COOKIE for his first solid food at about 6 months old, when I left the room to go to the bathroom.
So yeah, my point is that so many of us have been there. It isn't nice. Unfortunately, it's something that we just kind of have to deal with as it comes up.
Mommy to L - May 7, 07' , B - February 7, 09' , and R - August 18, 12'