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Thread: So sad when LO's weaning

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Feb 2010
    Posts
    558

    Default So sad when LO's weaning

    She's definitely weaning. She now will nurse only when sleepy. Even our once best nursing sessions - at bedtime and first thing in the morning - are now only one-sided and very short. My body can't seem to keep up - even when she nurses I have very little to offer. I feel so sad. Really sad. Call me silly if you may but I've been teary all day and crying as I'm typing this. I miss my baby. I miss when she came to the breast to really gulp down the milk. I miss the feeling of my heavy letdowns and of the precious substance that my body works to make going from my body into her. How do I take that back - I can't, I never can. I feel like mourning. I pushed through SO many obstacles to nurse her until now and wanted to nurse her for a long time. I'm not ready to stop now. To be fair, it's not like she HAS stopped, but since my body has really slowed down the milk making I feel the complete end is not far. I feel like mourning - am I so crazy to feel that way? What do I say to myself to feel better??? No one IRL understands, no one can offer me any words of comfort.


    First time, SAH mom to my precious daughter born October 2009
    Nursing 27 months and counting... I still love nursing so much and am SAD thinking the end can come anytime now...

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Posts
    1,293

    Default Re: So sad when LO's weaning

    you worked very hard for this wonderful relationship, and it is so wonderful, of course it is hard when you feel it is coming to an end. you are mourning the loss of something beautiful, that makes sense to me. there will be many moments like this throughout her life, but this one is especially close to heart.

    maybe compile a little book with photos of her nursing and even write down your nursing journey, kind of how people write their birth story.

    have fun with the memories, funny ones tough ones, etc. maybe even make a handprint of hers and yours, that way you can see how big her hand was when she weaned be creative

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    COUGARTOWN Baby! From here on in!
    Posts
    17,466

    Default Re: So sad when LO's weaning

    Well know that a lot of it hasto do with your own weaning off the oxcytocin you let down. It's VERY hormonal. And also it can really ebb and flow and the end can be a much much more gradual thing then you think. With DJ it went from once a day to every other day to a couple times a week. So since you are aware that it's coming and it's NOT going to be sudden, CHERISH the moments. Look at her. Take some pictures. Write her a letter. Them growing up is bitter sweet. Living in these moments is very important. Having momentos is important. Do something to celebrate the relationship. We had a weaning party and I got a breastfeeding tattoo. The tattoo made the relationship etched in stone so to speak. For both of us.
    Congratulations on making it this far.

    Way too lazy for formula

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Feb 2010
    Posts
    558

    Default Re: So sad when LO's weaning

    Thank you for your responses.

    Part (well, most, or even all) of me is still resisting the idea that she's really weaning, holding on to the hope that may be this is just a phase and she'll come back? Because she has. When we were moving out of the U.S. 3 weeks ago she had been nursing much less but suddenly started nursing every 2-3 hours on BOTH sides each time and man, my milk was FLOWING and I was sooo happy. Then she slowly backs away again... and it's been getting worse and worse... She isn't really dropping feedings... She still asks many times but when coming to the breast she sucks very lightly, a lot of times just holding my nipple in her mouth without sucking (but not letting either until I ask her)... Is that how some children wean? With that kind of suckling my breasts don't seem to get enough stimulation for making more milk and I'm thus making less and less Geez what do I say to myself to make it ACCEPT this weaning thing as a reality? I look at her nursing but NOT getting milk and I ache and miss terribly the gulping sound and the pink cheeks and the satiated look on her face after a good nursing session... Sorry I really need to vent - I still cannot wrap myself around this just yet.


    First time, SAH mom to my precious daughter born October 2009
    Nursing 27 months and counting... I still love nursing so much and am SAD thinking the end can come anytime now...

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Location
    Northern Cal.
    Posts
    4,984

    Default Re: So sad when LO's weaning

    I'm right there with you, mama. Joe is weaning, and I'm proud that he is so independent, but I'm not ready. And it has been more negative (with him rejecting me) than I envisioned. But I will say, it is going slowly. Joe still nurses every day. So I am trying to do what Shelly says - cherish the relationship while it lasts. Parenthood = letting go, letting our children grow up. And it is so hard sometimes. I try to remind myself, this is Joe's journey too. Not just mine. And it may not go the way I had imagined, but it is still OUR journey.


    You can call me JoMo!

    Mom to baby boy Joe, born 5/4/09 and breastfed for more than two and a half years, and baby girl Maggie, born 7/9/12.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    COUGARTOWN Baby! From here on in!
    Posts
    17,466

    Default Re: So sad when LO's weaning

    It sounds to me like her 2nd year molars are starting break. And that will bring 2 year olds back to the breast in short bursts for sure. For pain relief.

    Way too lazy for formula

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