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Thread: Haven't found the right pediatrician yet

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
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    Default Haven't found the right pediatrician yet

    We took DS for his 15 month check-up today and had an appointment with a different doc than before (on purpose). I haven't really liked the previous two doctors mainly because I don't like their CIO advice and when BF comes up I get an indifferent shrug like it doesn't matter one way or the other. In my mind, when I tell the doc he's still nursing at 15 months he'd be excited and give me a high-five! I think if I were in their position, that's how I would react. I don't want an award, but if would be nice to hear that we're on the right path even though I know this to be true. Looks like we're moving on to another doctor... Anybody else feel this way?
    DS was born June - 2010
    and with lots of help and support from my hubby
    Ready to pump wean!!

  2. #2
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    Apr 2008
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    Northern CA
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    Default Re: Haven't found the right pediatrician

    While I agree that a pat on the back would be great, I take the kids to the pediatrician for health care not parenting advice. I don't look to them for advice on sleeping, eating or behavior. It is not that I distrust them or dislike them in any way, it is just that to me these are beyond their typical training. If they tell me the exam is normal, baby is developing well, reaching milestones, etc... this is the reassurance I need that we are doing okay. Both pediatricians we have seen are mothers themselves, and they are very respectful of my viewpoint. I actually prefer if they are indifferent to my parenting rather than telling me how to raise my child.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    May 2006
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    21,149

    Default Re: Haven't found the right pediatrician

    with the PP. I want a pediatrician who is a good diagnostician, who has a good bedside manner with my child, and who can perform a good splinter removal. What they think of my parenting... Eh, I'm not that interested. But there's a difference between unsolicited bad parenting advice and your pediatrician pushing you to take said advice- if you pediatrician is looking at you with disgust and saying "Well, I advise you to wean" or "You must get this child on a schedule" or "You have to let her CIO" that's a different matter. I want my pediatrician to spend the 20 minutes I get from him/her dealing with my concerns, not pushing his/her own agenda.
    Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
    Coolest thing my little girl sang recently: "I love dat one-two pupples!"

  4. #4
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    Jun 2009
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    Default Re: Haven't found the right pediatrician

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*mommal View Post
    with the PP. I want a pediatrician who is a good diagnostician, who has a good bedside manner with my child, and who can perform a good splinter removal. What they think of my parenting... Eh, I'm not that interested. But there's a difference between unsolicited bad parenting advice and your pediatrician pushing you to take said advice- if you pediatrician is looking at you with disgust and saying "Well, I advise you to wean" or "You must get this child on a schedule" or "You have to let her CIO" that's a different matter. I want my pediatrician to spend the 20 minutes I get from him/her dealing with my concerns, not pushing his/her own agenda.
    especiacially the bolded. I moved docs 4 times before I settled on a Pedi for that reason. Pushing formula, telling me that I had to let my son CIO, giving me a hard time for selective vax etc etc so I found a pedi that while she still makes some 'suggestions' that i don't agree with, she doesn't push and she's good with the kids and has a great bed side manner. She has been wonderful when my baby girl was hospitalized and amazingly calming to my son when he had suffered a traumatic event. So we keep her even though at my DD's 6 mos well visit this week she told me that rice cereal was 'important' to help me BF less and 'give me a break' . She's a great doctor even if she says dumb things sometimes
    I'm Colleen
    Mama to
    Silas born May 2009 ~ Nursed 18 mos, weaned during pregnancy, unweaned at 24 months, still nursing when he feels like it
    Lola born March 2011 ~ The Mary Lou Retton of toddler nursing
    Married to Brandon
    Using cloth on both bums

    We hibernate together



  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
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    88

    Default Re: Haven't found the right pediatrician

    I've gotten the CIO speech twice. I figure that they should keep up with their field of practice and not just be complacent with what they learned in school. The last doc said he was ok with me nursing (like I need his approval) and that after two it just becomes a social issue. I would much rather not tell the doc anything, but keeping my hubby quiet doesn't work. Therefore, I need someone who is going to support me. DH has no issues with BF or co-sleeping, but I don't want him to me swayed by professional opinions. I'll keep searching, maybe I'll hit the jackpot one of these days
    DS was born June - 2010
    and with lots of help and support from my hubby
    Ready to pump wean!!

  6. #6
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    21,149

    Default Re: Haven't found the right pediatrician

    Meanwhile, don't be afraid to say "Before you get invested in having a CIO conversation, let me stop you. I came here for medical advice, not parenting advice. Let's confine our discussion to my baby's health, and if I have a parenting question, I'll ask for your advice". Maybe you'll shock the doc enough that she/he will think twice the next time she/he is about to offer unsolicited parenting advice. You might save some other momma from hearing the same BS!
    Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
    Coolest thing my little girl sang recently: "I love dat one-two pupples!"

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Location
    Missouri
    Posts
    112

    Default Re: Haven't found the right pediatrician

    I don't want to brag but I do have a great ped who has been so supportive with breastfeeding. It's nice because I know if we do have problems she isn't going to assume they are related to him still nursing. I went to a breastfeeding coalition type meeting and was happy to see she was one of the few peds there. I know there are peds out there who feel strongly about breastfeeding. I recently went to a conference where one of the main speakers was a ped who became a certified Lactation Consultant IBCLC so she could help her patients better. That's the kind of ped I want, because if they are smart enough to realize the importance of breastfeeding then they are probably pretty good docs and the opposite might also be true if they are a ped and don't value breastfeeding how good of a ped can they be, just my opinion.
    Did this for 9months with Kailey and Hailey
    who are now 8.

    weaned Dane somewhere around 3.5 no longer he likes to sleep with his sisters He's now 5

    Now I am , , My baby Cruz who is almost 6 months and my last baby

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
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    166

    Default Re: Haven't found the right pediatrician

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*mommal View Post
    Meanwhile, don't be afraid to say "Before you get invested in having a CIO conversation, let me stop you. I came here for medical advice, not parenting advice. Let's confine our discussion to my baby's health, and if I have a parenting question, I'll ask for your advice". Maybe you'll shock the doc enough that she/he will think twice the next time she/he is about to offer unsolicited parenting advice. You might save some other momma from hearing the same BS!
    being a SAHM to DD born 12/09

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
    Posts
    88

    Default Re: Haven't found the right pediatrician

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*romeroke View Post
    I don't want to brag but I do have a great ped who has been so supportive with breastfeeding. It's nice because I know if we do have problems she isn't going to assume they are related to him still nursing. I went to a breastfeeding coalition type meeting and was happy to see she was one of the few peds there. I know there are peds out there who feel strongly about breastfeeding. I recently went to a conference where one of the main speakers was a ped who became a certified Lactation Consultant IBCLC so she could help her patients better. That's the kind of ped I want, because if they are smart enough to realize the importance of breastfeeding then they are probably pretty good docs and the opposite might also be true if they are a ped and don't value breastfeeding how good of a ped can they be, just my opinion.
    .

    Your ped sounds ideal!! I really like the office that we go to so I'm going to schedule an appointment with one of the female docs there and see if she is a better fit for us.
    DS was born June - 2010
    and with lots of help and support from my hubby
    Ready to pump wean!!

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    36

    Default Re: Haven't found the right pediatrician

    Interviewing some of the other docs is a great idea! You might also try asking the office staff or your favorite nurse there about the attitudes of the other docs; they may be able to give you an "inside scoop" that will help speed up your search. If you have to seek outside that office, try attending a local La Leche meeting. My local group closes the formal meeting--where we don't make recommendations or mix causes--in time for an informal chat period where we can ask each others questions like this without LLLI endorsing any of the answers.
    Mama Jen

    Mom to:
    Happy Toddler, 19 months, still bfeeding
    Late Son, passed at age 8, bfed 5 months
    Daughter the Elder, age 19 yrs, bfed for 22 months

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