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Thread: HELP!!!

  1. #1

    Default HELP!!!

    Hi everyone! Looking for some advice and help. I am currently co-sleeping with a 3 year old and a 17 month old. The 17 month old is a very dedicated nurser. Nurses all day and all night like a newborn. I am exhausted. I would really like to start the “weaning process” but am very unsure as to how to go about it. I have been using the “don’t offer/don’t refuse” for awhile, but she ALWAYS wants it!!! I can’t really go about denying her at night without waking up both my husband and my 3 year old because my 17 month old is VERY vocal when I try to say no. Have thought about going into another room with her at night but am worried it’s just going to turn into a screaming mess that has me in tears and giving her the boob just to stop the crying. Even my 3 year old will occasionally nurse (it’s hard to say no to him when his sister is nursing so much). I really love all of the love and bonding that has come as a result of bed-sharing and nursing but the bottom line is – I am exhausted. I need to get my body back. HELP!!!!!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Feb 2008

    Default Re: HELP!!!

    I found that weaning for part of the night allowed me to get a solid chunk of sleep and feel so much better.i would put the noys to hed at 8. ds2 nursed off and on depending on when he woke up until 11. between 11 and 1 i would just try to pat or snuggle back to sleep, if he protested too kuch we would nurse anyway. The stretch of time between 11 and 1 gradually got longer and longer until oneday we didn't wake until the sun was up. My ds2 was about a year older than yours when we did this so i do not know how a younger lo would do. I do feel your pain though.
    Proud mom of 2 boys, both weaned gradually and with love.

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  3. #3
    Join Date
    Mar 2006

    Default Re: HELP!!!

    What has always worked for us is to have Daddy step up and take over the nighttime parenting. For us, having mom there but not nursing would result in a scream-fest. So...remove mom, and while the kid would fuss and cry, it wasn't like Daddy was ignoring the kid or not offering comfort. It was just not what the kid wanted, but it's not CIO alone. So I move into another room alone, or with the newborn, and toddler learns to sleep with Daddy. Just weaning at night usually makes a big difference to a mama. I think Dr. Gordon has some info on how to nightwean too, but I don't have any links.
    Mama to my all-natural boys: Ian, 9-4-04, 11.5 lbs; Colton, 11-7-06, 9 lbs, in the water; Logan, 12-8-08, 9 lbs; Gavin, 1-18-11, 9 lbs; and an angel 1-15-06
    18+ months and for Gavin, born with an incomplete cleft lip and incomplete posterior cleft palate
    Sealed for time and eternity, 7-7-93
    Always babywearing, cosleeping and cloth diapering. Living with oppositional defiant disorder and ADHD. Ask me about cloth diapering and sewing your own diapers!

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jul 2007

    Default Re: HELP!!!

    We used Daddy too for my older one, she just didn't expect milk from him so she didn't put up much fuss at all. Luckily with DD2 we never kept on with the night feedings after the first several months, she is a much better sleeper than DD1 tho.
    Mom to Abigail, born May 3rd, 2007 (self-weaned at 27 mths) and Charlotte, born Nov. 24th, 2009. Both reflux babies and EBF. Charlotte weighs 31 lbs at 26 mths.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Nov 2010

    Default Re: HELP!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*aprilsmagic View Post
    I think Dr. Gordon has some info on how to nightwean too, but I don't have any links.
    Here it is: http://drjaygordon.com/attachment/sleeppattern.html

    SAHM-WAHM to lovely Lizzie, born at home 9/14/2010

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