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Thread: New mom in serious need of new advice

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Location
    Nashville, TN
    Posts
    7

    Unhappy New mom in serious need of new advice

    So here's my problem...s

    Eversince my little girl was born we had issues with breast feeding. First it was that she never would latch on for longer than a few minutes and never got any milk. So I freaked out and had my husband buy me a pump from the hospital. So she was on the bottle for about the first 2 months of her life while I was working on nursing with her. Finally I got her to breastfeed and she was doing great but after the first month or so she started tugging at the breast and she was only pooping once every 3 days so I pumped and found that I was only producing up to 2oz. This is what I'm thinking may have caused this
    1. she started sleeping 10hrs through the night at 6 weeks
    2. I started my periods as soon as I stopped bleeding from the pregnancy.
    3. possibly she wasn't sucking properly due to the fact she was so used to the bottle.
    4.. this is going to sound funny but I know milk flow is extremely psycholigical.. so I ran out of breastpads and was waiting to buy some because there was a certain kind I liked to use and they were out so I wonder if the fact that I didn't want milk to leak could have slowed my milk supply. I mean I went a few weeks without them.
    5. I started worrying about my weight and watching calories.. trying to limit myself to 1700 -2000 calories
    6. Started having a major aversion to water.. makes me want to throw up

    This is what I have been doing to help.

    1. I have been taking fenugreek 2 610mg capsules 3X daily.. been at it for 2wks
    2. Drinking mother's milk tea 2-3 cups/day
    3. nursing every 2 hours
    4. waking up and pumping at 3:00am every night
    5. Eating oatmeal cookies with my mothers milk tea, oatmeal for breakfast..Trying to eat more fruits, veggies, beans, meats, less prepared food.

    none of this has been working for me. I have no idea what else to do.. I'm totally stressing out and I know that just makes things worse. Formula is not an option. My husband had cancer when he was 4 and I know that formula fed babies are 80% more likely to develop cancer.
    Also I would like some more ideas on avoiding the bottle. Obviously I'm having to pump a lot and I am not going to waste the milk I'm getting. What do you guys think about the breastflow bottles? Or I was considering using a dropper.. or even a spoon.
    I would appreciate ANY advice I can get. I have been struggling with this for way too long and I can't help but feel like a horrible mother
    Please Please Please help!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Location
    Maine
    Posts
    1,805

    Default Re: New mom in serious need of new advic

    Hi Mama! How long is she nursing when you nurse every two hours? Does she still wake up during the night to nurse? Two ounces when you pump is a very normal amount. You're doing everything you can - and I think you might be over worrying this.
    How many wet diapers is she having a day? Is your pee/sweat smelling like maple syrup from the fenugreek? I used to take four capsules three times a day to notice a difference in my supply. Pumping is not a good indication at all of what your baby is actually getting when she's nursing from you. Do you know that bfed babies only need 1-1.5 ounces of milk an hour?
    Julia and Maxwell (and Dan and Haddie)
    Maxwell, born January 3, 2010
    A year on Mama's milk and still loving it

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    10,440

    Default Re: New mom in serious need of new advic

    I just want to say...you might be worrying about nothing

    Pooping every few days is totally normal.

    Tugging can be an indication of a slow flow, a fast flow, a low supply or a high supply.

    Pumping does NOT indicate production. At all. Some moms with great supplies cannot pump a drop!

    If her WET diapers are adequate in number, she's fine. If her weight -- taken on the same scale every time -- is meeting the BF baby growth curve (Make sure your doc is using this one!), she's fine.
    Susan
    Mama to my all-natural boys: Ian, 9-4-04, 11.5 lbs; Colton, 11-7-06, 9 lbs, in the water; Logan, 12-8-08, 9 lbs; Gavin, 1-18-11, 9 lbs; and an angel 1-15-06
    18+ months and for Gavin, born with an incomplete cleft lip and incomplete posterior cleft palate
    Sealed for time and eternity, 7-7-93
    Always babywearing, cosleeping and cloth diapering. Living with oppositional defiant disorder and ADHD. Ask me about cloth diapering and sewing your own diapers!

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Location
    Nashville, TN
    Posts
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    Default Re: New mom in serious need of new advic

    When I nurse her it's hit and miss. Sometimes she will stay on for about 5-10min before popping on and off. for the most part I can hardly ever hear her swallow. In order to get the 2oz when I'm pumping I have to keep the pump on for forever and move it around to different positions. I know she's not getting enough milk because she cries really hard every time I stop nursing to burp her. And whenever I stop nursing I check to make sure I am out of milk. She only gives about 4 wet diapers. She is very unhappy with the amount I am giving her she cries almost nonstop all day and I feel horrible about it.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    21,144

    Default Re: New mom in serious need of new advic

    Welcome! I am sorry you've been having such a rough time. But don't worry- my instinct is to think that things are not as bad as you think they are, and even if they are that bad, they are fixable. You got your baby to the breast after 2 months of not nursing- if you can overcome that you can overcome anything!

    So, here's what I'm thinking.
    1. 2 oz is a normal amount to pump. That may be surprising if you were getting a lot more before, but 2 oz is really very typical. See this link for more on what is normal when it comes to pump output: http://www.kellymom.com/bf/pumping/p..._decrease.html
    2. If your baby is producing adequate wet and poopy diapers, her intake is normal even if she is tugging at the breast or exhibiting other confusing or fussy nursing behaviors.
    3. Pooping every 3 days is normal in an exclusively breastfed baby, as long as weight gain is normal. As the baby's digestive system matures, poop frequency can slow down to once every week or so, because breastmilk is digested so completely.
    4. After you have been nursing for a certain amount of time, it is normal for supply to adjust so that it meets demand very precisely. At that point, most women experience decreased or vanished feelings of engorgement and breast fullness, as well as reduced or vanished leaking.
    5. Not eating enough is unlikely to impact milk supply unless you are severely malnourished. Up to that point, limiting calories just means that you burn fat faster.
    6. Limiting water should not impact milk supply unless you are dehydrated. In general, all that is necessary is for you to drink to thirst, and it doesn't really matter what you drink. Juice, milk, even coffee, tea, or soda are enough to keep you hydrated.
    Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
    Coolest thing my little girl sang recently: "I love dat one-two pupples!"

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Location
    Northern BC, Canada
    Posts
    433

    Default Re: New mom in serious need of new advic

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*vtowen View Post
    So here's my problem...s

    Eversince my little girl was born we had issues with breast feeding. First it was that she never would latch on for longer than a few minutes and never got any milk. So I freaked out and had my husband buy me a pump from the hospital. So she was on the bottle for about the first 2 months of her life while I was working on nursing with her. Finally I got her to breastfeed and she was doing great but after the first month or so she started tugging at the breast and she was only pooping once every 3 days so I pumped and found that I was only producing up to 2oz(1). This is what I'm thinking may have caused this
    1. she started sleeping 10hrs through the night at 6 weeks
    2. I started my periods as soon as I stopped bleeding from the pregnancy.
    3. possibly she wasn't sucking properly due to the fact she was so used to the bottle.
    4.. this is going to sound funny but I know milk flow is extremely psycholigical.. so I ran out of breastpads and was waiting to buy some because there was a certain kind I liked to use and they were out so I wonder if the fact that I didn't want milk to leak could have slowed my milk supply. I mean I went a few weeks without them.
    5. I started worrying about my weight and watching calories.. trying to limit myself to 1700 -2000 calories(2)
    6. Started having a major aversion to water.. makes me want to throw up(3)

    This is what I have been doing to help.

    1. I have been taking fenugreek 2 610mg capsules 3X daily.. been at it for 2wks
    2. Drinking mother's milk tea 2-3 cups/day
    3. nursing every 2 hours
    4. waking up and pumping at 3:00am every night
    5. Eating oatmeal cookies with my mothers milk tea, oatmeal for breakfast..Trying to eat more fruits, veggies, beans, meats, less prepared food.

    none of this has been working for me. I have no idea what else to do.. I'm totally stressing out and I know that just makes things worse(4). Formula is not an option. My husband had cancer when he was 4 and I know that formula fed babies are 80% more likely to develop cancer.
    Also I would like some more ideas on avoiding the bottle. Obviously I'm having to pump a lot and I am not going to waste the milk I'm getting. What do you guys think about the breastflow bottles? Or I was considering using a dropper.. or even a spoon. (5)
    I would appreciate ANY advice I can get. I have been struggling with this for way too long and I can't help but feel like a horrible mother
    Please Please Please help!
    1. 2oz in one sitting is perfectly normal. Is that what you ment? Each mom has a different "storage capacity" that controlls how much you can pump in one sitting.
    http://www.nancymohrbacher.com/blog/...on-part-1.html
    2. The amount of calories you limited yourself to doesn't seem like it would be the problem. However if it is a huge difference for you it could cause an issue. LLL has a book about losing weight while nursing.
    http://www.librarything.com/work/238920
    3. If you take a two litre bottle and fill it up it helps you to see if you're drinking enough water. If you drink too much you will feel sick.
    4. Yes stress take a large toll on bfing if you can't handle it. Find someone to vent to (like us!)
    5. Both are good ideas. A bendable cup might work too.
    July 30, 2010-6lbs 2oz- 41w 4d (emergency c-section.) Known dairy, eggs, dogs and cats allergies, eczema, and asthma
    Bonus June 22, 2006 (is 50/50 Custody ) (born 32w) Sensitive to changing temps.
    We BF, BW, Co-sleep and use cloth diapers/pull-ups!

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Location
    Northern BC, Canada
    Posts
    433

    Default Re: New mom in serious need of new advic

    Oh and and congrats on the lo!
    July 30, 2010-6lbs 2oz- 41w 4d (emergency c-section.) Known dairy, eggs, dogs and cats allergies, eczema, and asthma
    Bonus June 22, 2006 (is 50/50 Custody ) (born 32w) Sensitive to changing temps.
    We BF, BW, Co-sleep and use cloth diapers/pull-ups!

  8. #8
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    21,144

    Default Re: New mom in serious need of new advic

    4 wet diapers per day is definitely too little. But sometimes it is hard to find the pee in an absorbent disposable diaper. You might want to try tucking a square of tissue in front of your baby's privates- when she pees, the tissue will be visibly wet. This can help you gain an accurate pee count, if that is an issue.
    Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
    Coolest thing my little girl sang recently: "I love dat one-two pupples!"

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Location
    Nashville, TN
    Posts
    7

    Default Re: New mom in serious need of new advic

    yeah thats a good idea. i try to keep a good eye on when she is wetting but that sounds like a better idea! thank u!

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    10,440

    Default Re: New mom in serious need of new advic

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*vtowen View Post
    When I nurse her it's hit and miss. Sometimes she will stay on for about 5-10min before popping on and off. for the most part I can hardly ever hear her swallow. In order to get the 2oz when I'm pumping I have to keep the pump on for forever and move it around to different positions. I know she's not getting enough milk because she cries really hard every time I stop nursing to burp her. And whenever I stop nursing I check to make sure I am out of milk. She only gives about 4 wet diapers. She is very unhappy with the amount I am giving her she cries almost nonstop all day and I feel horrible about it.
    Sometimes, babies just cry. My oldest cried all.the.time. If he was awake, he was crying. He cried to sleep. He cried when he woke up. And he cried after feeding. He cried during feedings. He cried before feeding. It was terrible.

    Turned out he had reflux.

    Sometimes, too they cry when you take them off to burp them. Because they don't want to burp. They want to eat, and you are interrupting them.

    What you say about the horns makes me go hmmm. Are they the right size? You might need a different size. And don't forget to do your breast compressions while pumping. You will get more milk with that. There's a video on expression in the pumping forum as well that you might find interesting.

    If you were bottlefeeding previously, it's pretty normal for babies to be frustrated at the breast. Bottles are easy. Breasts are not.

    I am bothered by the statement that you don't see her swallowing.

    But this might just be the normal regulation of your supply

    Are you pumping with a hospital grade pump or just a PISA?

    This IS totally fixable. There's moms here who have relactated -- started with practically nothing -- and are now 100% feeding their children. Don't give up hope.
    Susan
    Mama to my all-natural boys: Ian, 9-4-04, 11.5 lbs; Colton, 11-7-06, 9 lbs, in the water; Logan, 12-8-08, 9 lbs; Gavin, 1-18-11, 9 lbs; and an angel 1-15-06
    18+ months and for Gavin, born with an incomplete cleft lip and incomplete posterior cleft palate
    Sealed for time and eternity, 7-7-93
    Always babywearing, cosleeping and cloth diapering. Living with oppositional defiant disorder and ADHD. Ask me about cloth diapering and sewing your own diapers!

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