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Thread: I'm tired but don't want to quit

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Posts
    12

    Default I'm tired but don't want to quit

    This is my 3rd baby and my most difficult one that I've nursed. As I looked at a couple other sites that I was directed to from here I am now thinking that the lactation person at the hospital misdirected me a little. From about 3 weeks my DD nursed through the fast flow and then quit. I was told she was probably an efficient nurser and I probably had a strong letdown, which probably did have some truth, but I think that also hurt me.

    At this point she is 7 months and waking up every 1-1/2 - 2 hours at night. I know we shouldn't worry about time, but she literally is nursing 5 minutes and then quits (pretty much when the fast flow is complete). I'm tired. I have a 7-year-old and a 4-year-old and am going all day. She did sleep long stretches from weeks 4-9 (7:00PM - 3:00AM) and then just quit. It has gotten progressively worse and now we're at this point. She also distracts pretty easy, but nothing has helped with that, not even a dark room! Oh, and she's not eating solids because she refuses them.

    I am determined to finish this until she is at least a year, but nights like tonight I'm just tired and want to cry and give up. I know I maybe need to contact an LC, but am looking for any tips, BTDT experiences, etc.

    If you read all of this, thanks for letting me "speak". I don't complain to anyone because I want to do this. Deep down I know I am willing to BF even if it means getting up every night for the next 5 months every 2 hours.

    Thanks

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Posts
    4,893

    Default Re: I'm tired but don't want to quit

    I know this isn't what you want to hear but it all sounds totally normal. My son is 11 months old and finally giving me a 4 hour stretch at night and only in the past 1.5 months has started really taking to solids. I know it's exhausting. I wish I had some advice. But know that you are not alone.
    If you obey all the rules, you miss all the fun. - Katharine Hepburn

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Posts
    12

    Default Re: I'm tired but don't want to quit

    Thank you, that's probably all that I really need to hear! I have two SIL's who had babies born in March, both are also EBF'ing, but their DD's are sleeping at night (one is doing 6+ hours and the other is doing 12+ hours). They both do CIO though as well in the middle of the night when they do wake, and I just can't.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
    Posts
    88

    Default Re: I'm tired but don't want to quit

    My son wakes up all the time to nurse and it's exhausting. Mine is 14 months so I'm hoping that once his molars break through, I can work with him to sleep longer stretches. If they let their babies CIO, then they are not truly sleeping through the night, only the parents are. Hope it gets easier for you!!
    DS was born June - 2010
    and with lots of help and support from my hubby
    Ready to pump wean!!

  5. #5

    Default Re: I'm tired but don't want to quit

    That's just the way mine have always fed too! I don't know if nursing longer would change anything because I've never tried but I do understand the frequent nursing and night feeds. Its hard, but this stage will pass. Just want to send lots of love your direction!

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Posts
    5,883

    Default Re: I'm tired but don't want to quit

    CIO

    My third baby was a train wreck and had sleep regression at seven months. In time for developmental milestones like crawling and pulling up and painful teething. It was very tiring. If it helps you gently nightwean with Dr Jay Gordon's method around a year. Look at that as a milestone.

    Also a lifesaver for me was cosleeping. I know some people are reluctant, but I needed to be fresh for my family and nursing was important.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jul 2011
    Posts
    54

    Default Re: I'm tired but don't want to quit

    Hi, im sorry to hear your having such a hard time. My little one (6 months) used to sleep 5 hours plus at one point now we are back to 1, 2 or if im lucky 3 hours at a time. Co sleeping really helps me and we both definitely sleep better at night because neither wake up completely... although now she has figured out crawling she rolls over and wakes herself up.. But co sleeping is so much better. Good luck... sending lotsa warm cozy thoughts for baby to sleep longer for you. Sorry i dont have much other advise.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
    Posts
    79

    Default Re: I'm tired but don't want to quit

    You are not alone! I am so happy i stuck it out...my dd is 11 months and i am going back to work in 2 weeks. I wanted to have her completely weaned by 1 year old but i have decided to let her bf at night for as long as she wants...We are now working on weaning during the day...Its worth it...Me too sometimes iw anted to cry waking up every hour or sometimes even 15 minutes...I am exhausted but i am so proud that my baby was EBF...Don't compare your baby or your BF relationships to others too much...their habits change non stop...Just do what you think is best...I am sure you are doing a great job so far!
    first time mama to a gassy but adorable baby named Makayla- Wouldn't give up breasfeeding for anything in the world.

    We co-sleep, we love and

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
    Posts
    251

    Default Re: I'm tired but don't want to quit

    Co-sleeping is a life-saver at our house. When I was getting out of bed every time Lizzie woke up to nurse her in our "special chair," I would have to stay in bed 11-12 hours a day and literally sleep every time she slept in order for me to feel rested. She wakes about every 2 hours at night these days (after sleeping well when she was younger) and nurses for only a couple minutes like yours does. The only thing that makes this tenable is that I don't have to get out of bed every time.

    I also try not to complain anymore about her sleep to anyone other than my husband. I just don't have it in me to fight the grand fight against all the well-wishers who think she should just CIO. It's good to have this forum to let off some steam occasionally, though.
    -Hannah

    SAHM-WAHM to lovely Lizzie, born at home 9/14/2010


  10. #10

    Default Re: I'm tired but don't want to quit



    We had a similar experience. It's basically just too much milk too fast. The frequent nursing keeps your supply up, but then my baby was just getting the foremilk because he hated nursing after letdown.

    You can let your baby nurse until you almost let down and then letdown on a blanket/towel/shirt/stuffed animal whatever is handy and then relatch them. My baby would get really mad/scream and wanted to keep nursing but that's better than them only getting foremilk. I would definitely be block nursing if you aren't, the first nursing session might be rocky but then the second should be mostly hindmilk with a much slower letdown.

    If you have tons and tons of milk you might want to look into reducing supply, or more like make sure you aren't doing stuff to increase it such as additional pumping or nursing both sides. Oatmeal can even increase your supply. Its so sneaky.

    There was a period around mid-way when it was a fight. Literally everyday was a struggle to breastfeed and make it through the day, but at about 9-10 mos it seems to change a lot. I hope this helps, or at least gives you hope!
    Carmen-Noel mum to James born naturally 8/28/2010.
    Mommy's little pumpkin head


    We love our amber necklace from @llli*expat-mum. PM her for the most beautiful effective teething aide we've found!

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