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Thread: Frustrated

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Posts
    458

    Unhappy Frustrated

    My son is almost 8 weeks old. He was born 5 weeks early, and spent 4 days in the NICU. Because I had an emergency c-section with some minor complications, my son was given a bottle and a pacifier before I was even out of recovery, and I got no skin-to-skin bonding with for the first 10 hours of his life. We tried bf in the hospital, and it was okay until my milk came in. I pumped after that, but he couldn't seem to latch. We saw an LC, and she gave us a nipple shield that seemed to help, but the pediatrician was concerned about his weight loss, so we had no room for error and he was fed with bottles (both formula and expressed milk) for the next 3 weeks or so. Once he was up over 7 pounds, the pediatrician told me I could go back to working on bf, and she had me start taking fenugreek to help with my supply. At 5.5 weeks of age, my son finally seemed to get the hang of bf, and I was thrilled. However, I feel like we've slipped back... he feeds really well at the beginning of a feeding, for about 5 minutes or so on each side, but then he starts screaming and bouncing his head off my shoulder, rooting around a bit, when I go to burp him. So I'll feed him some more, again switching sides about every 5-7 minutes, but he gets progressively more and more inefficient, and after 45 minutes to an hour, he's STILL hungry. So my DH has had to put together formula bottles again. I don't understand what's happening. I'm really worried that the fenugreek isn't doing anything and my milk supply, not having been well established in the early days (I wasn't very consistent with pumping because I was so exhausted) won't be enough to carry us through the next months. I go back to work on Monday, and I'm so frustrated I can barely sleep anymore, which I know isn't helping. And I know my frustration is radiating to my baby. On top of all this, despite two weeks of nearly exclusive bf, I'm not losing any weight, so I worry that my diet isn't right, too. Help! I don't want to give up, but it's just not any fun for me.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Posts
    176

    Default Re: Frustrated

    I had a lot issues w/ b-feeding after supplementing, and I started just pumping after 3 weeks. It's a pain, but at least he's getting breasmilk. I got tired of struggling w/ him to b-feed.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Posts
    236

    Default Re: Frustrated

    I am sorry you are having a tough time.. Congrats on the new baby and kudos on sticking it out. As a Mom of a preemie ( 28 weeks) and now a baby SGA I have experienced many of the same difficulties. I hope that everyone here will be able to help. As I was reading your post I was struck by one thing.
    he feeds really well at the beginning of a feeding, for about 5 minutes or so on each side, but then he starts screaming and bouncing his head off my shoulder, rooting around a bit, when I go to burp him. So I'll feed him some more, again switching sides about every 5-7 minutes, but he gets progressively more and more inefficient, and after 45 minutes to an hour, he's STILL hungry
    I am wondering why you are switching after only 7 minutes .A LLL will better be able to help you but it is my understanding that a baby should be allowed to fully empty the first breast before switching. This allows for a good balance of foremilk and hindmilk. Conversely switching often does acually increase your milk supply. At 8 weeks all new mothers are still eatablishing their milk supply.. It is not to late to build up your supply. Remember to take care of yourelf. You are still recovering. As for weight loss give yourself a breather you are still considered postpartum. Please keep posting. I hope you and you little one are doing well.
    Last edited by BrooklynMama; November 18th, 2006 at 10:04 PM. Reason: Adding further

    Mama to DD Mariah 04/03 2lbs 8oz BF 2yrs 1 day!
    DS Ryan 07/06 4lbs 15 oz No solids until 18 mo's!
    "You must be the change you wish to see in the world" Gandhi

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Posts
    92

    Default Re: Frustrated

    My son was 2 months early and in the NICU for 3 weeks. Also bottle fed, pacifier, no skin to skin at first etc.. same problems you had. When we came home I was determined to BF and didn't give up. I put him to the breast any time he wanted it and just fed him on demand around the clock. I left him on one side for 20-30 min. at first then offered the other one. For the next feeding offer the other breast first. The more he's on the breast the more milk you will make. I never gave him the option of a bottle only the breast. It meant that at first he was on the breast what seamed like all the time. But after a few weeks he got it and is full time BF now. If you want to do it you can! It will be frustrating but stick it out it gets better. Don't beat yourself up though if you go back to the bottle a few times before your LO gets the hang of it. Good luck!

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Posts
    128

    Default Re: Frustrated

    I was told when my DD was born that in order to avoid gas problems and for various other reasons, I shouldn't be letting her nurse for more than 10 miniutes on either side (at a time) It wasn't untill I threw this info out the window that things started to calm down a bit. I know it can be hard in the beginning, to say the least, just keep in mind why it is you wanted to breast feed and remember that you will both be stronger overcoming these problems than ever before. Get lots of help from diffrent people, you never know what silly little thing will make things better, and trust your instincts.

    I Really wish you the best of luck.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Posts
    458

    Smile Re: Frustrated

    Thanks for the responses so far. I went back to work today, to EBF is out of the question now, but I am still trying to get my supply up. As for the switching sides, I think I read that somewhere that it would help with the supply and wake up a sleeping baby, but it didn't really seem to do either. Then my mother told me that anything over 20 minutes of nursing was pointless. I'm ignoring her now. LOL

    He seems to be nursing okay again. I think part of it was that my period started, so my supply dipped a little. Since my supply sucks anyway, I had to supplement. I'm not going to stress about that anymore... as long as he gets fed, that's what counts.

    But any other suggestions/advice/support are helpful.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Posts
    11

    Default Re: Frustrated

    I had the same issue with my oldest son. He was 3 weeks early, wouldn't latch on at first. I didn't pump the 8-12 times a day because I was so utterly exhausted. KWIM. Then when he was about a month old he got the hang of nursing but my supply was low. He was also a slow eater. That gets better as they get older.

    My only advice to you is pump while you are at work, and when home, nurse as often as you can. Let him nurse as long as he wants. The more you nurse, the better your supply will be. As he gets older, he'll be more efficient.

    I nursed my son until he was 5 months old. He never really loved nursing. I still regret weaning him so young, but it was a challenge. I can relate. I am now nursing my youngest who is 17 months old. And, I know women with similar issues who nursed beyond 2 years. You can do it if you are commited. Take heart, whatever you give him is a gift. BF isn't the only way to show you love him. You're doing great.

    Brenda

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Posts
    458

    Default Re: Frustrated

    Well, the problem has returned, only now, he will hang out at my breasts just licking at them. I only have so much patience because every time I think he's dozed off for good and move him, he starts whining and then screaming. My nerves are just shot and I honestly think it's time to give up. I can't seem to increase my supply, my breasts hurt much of the time now, and I'm not pumping enough at work to cover his daily needs anyway. I just don't think I can handle this anymore... I feel like such a failure.

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