I am new to this site after searching and searching for gentle parenting i hope to get some much needed advice.
Im a first time mother of a 5 1/2 month girl. She had co slept in our bed since she was born and i exclusively breastfeed. She nurses to sleep almost every night and almost every nap time. My husband and i think differently about co sleeping but thats another story, due to this we have moved her to her room. Not blaming my husband completely but we do have a small bed and my daughter does like to sleep in the star fish position so that doesnt leave much room for us on the bed.
I would take her to bed with me at 7.30 because thats the earliest i could go to bed with having dinner. She would not sleep alone at all, she would just wake up if i wasnt there which i understand. Anyway she would feed to sleep and wake up at 1 or 3 to feed again and then wake up every hour until 6am when she would be awake and sometimes if we were lucky she would sleep another hour till 7am.
about 3 weeks ago we moved her to her room. I am adamant not to try the cio method (which my husband is happy to try , he doesnt see it as a problem for her to cry herself to sleep, he thinks that she will learn to put herself to sleep and then sleep all night... if only he knew )and so i have said no and i am trying everything i can to help her sleep as long a stretch as possible for her. first tried to feed, waited until she fell asleep and then put her in her crib. With this she would wake up the moment we put her in. So then i put the crib mattress on the floor and layed with her, fed her and she would fall asleep. I would lay for a few mins and get up and she sleeps for an hour maybe 2 and very rarely 3.
With naps i cant put her down anywhere so i carry her around alot in my Ergo when we go out and while im in the house. I want to make sure she gets sleep so i am happy to wear her.
I know she can sleep till 1 am because she used to sleep in bed with me and now wake up once in between. Now while she is sleeping in her mattress she wakes up every hour... maybe 2 or 3/4 the most which i am really happy with... I'm just finding it so hard with the 1 hour wakings. I end up spending alot of time in her room on her matress and falling asleep there but its so uncomfortable. She seems to wake up alot and just wanting to feed. The other night she just woke up every 30 mins and sucked fell asleep and sucked fell asleep ahain.. I know right now she must need it or she wouldnt wake up? I feel like im doing it all wrong.. i dont know what to do i am so desperate.. i just feel like a terrible mother for putting her in her room.
1. i want to carry on nursing her at night at 1 am and if she needs another after that.
2. i dont want for nursing to be the only way she falls asleep now (even though this is how i set things up) i think if she can fall asleep by herself it will be easier for her to go to bed and to fall asleep again when she wakes up. And i really want to beable to do this without having to resort to the cio
i adore our baby and want to do whats right for her. please help. thank you so much for your time.