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Thread: Mixed feelings/ melancholy about my recently weaned 17 month old

  1. #1

    Default Mixed feelings/ melancholy about my recently weaned 17 month old

    Here is our situation- Since about 12 months or so I started nursing ds (who is now 17 months) less and less.The first year was pretty great but once he started getting more teeth, getting bigger, eating lots of food, etc, I found myself less inclined to nurse. From 12 month- 17 months I found myself doing it but not enjoying it very much. I would feel kind of nervous during it- we had a few biting issues but it really wasn't that bad, I actually felt kind of whimpy about it as I let it scare me off pretty quickly. Ds seemed to not mind as the nursings tapered off. We went down to about 2 a day and even those I felt uneasy during, and proud afterwards that I was still doing it. Then I started to feel my supply getting pretty low. I can't remember exact chronological order of things but it just started getting less and less. I know ds could sense my discomfort with it. Anyway- in the past month or two we went down to once in the mornign, and I got an electric breast pump and pumped aout 4 X a day and gave it to him in a cup. I only express 1-2 oz's per pumping but I felt good that I was at least giving him some more breast milk each day and trying to rebuild or at least maintain my supply. In the last 2 weeks he just has refused to nurse at all! I have mixed feeings about it. On one hand, I always had intended to nurse till at least two. I think he will Likely be my only child- not 100% but good chance of it. I just found that during the nursings sessions I felt nervous that he would bite me- or that his latch was uncomfortable. At any rate- now for the last 2-3 weeks he just straight up refuses, as I mentioned. At first I tried to encourage him, but it is also mixed with a sense of feeling that maybe it is our time to wean. I still pump 4-5 times a day because I am not ready to stop lactating. So I do still have supply. Just in the last few days I have been feeling melancholy about it. But when I offer he just crawls off my lap, shakes his head and says no (na, na na is how he says no!).
    So I am just unclear about what I want. If I knew for sure I wanted to keep nursing I would just offer a lot and try to get him to do it. But part of me feels that it is enough- we are still very close- co sleep, I am a sahm so I am with him all the time- I am not sure what I want! I don't even know if he would nurse if I tried and tried. It was our thing that when we were down to once a day it was first time in the morning. But I still felt that feeling of not really enjoying it when I was doing it but then feeling proud afterwards. Which is why I thought just pumping would be ideal for us as he still gets some milk but I don't nurse. But now I miss nursing! It is not too late as I am still lactating. I am unsure what to do- thoughts?
    Last edited by @llli*delphine; July 26th, 2011 at 09:56 PM.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2009

    Default Re: Mixed feelings/ melancholy about my recently weaned 17 month old

    Do you think you can get over the fear of being bit? How long has it been since he's nursed?

    Mommy to
    Lilah 10/08 nursed 25 months
    Beatrix 01/11 nursed 30 months

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jul 2011

    Default Re: Mixed feelings/ melancholy about my recently weaned 17 month old

    My son was 3.5 and there was a seven month gap in the orphanage between where his mother was breastfeeding him and when he came home and we began nursing. So, I think it is definitely possible to re-introduce nursing. With that being said I know your situation is a bit different and he is refusing it. I know from other mothers who stopped and restarted that it does take persistence and time to reintroduce it. I think if you're not ready to wean it is worth giving it your best shot.
    Dr. Dettwyler's study says that a normal range for a human to wean is 2.5- 7 years old. So, he's definitely younger and it would (IMO) be worth giving it your best shot (and give it time!)..... However, those are ranges and there is a small possibility he might just be ready to wean.
    Adoptive and Bio Mommy to Two Breastfeeding Boys!


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