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Thread: EBF to pumping

  1. #11
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Posts
    24

    Default Re: EBF to pumping

    Its just overwhelming.. Im only 20 so making the transition from doing what I want, to sitting inside feeding him all the time has been very VERY difficult. It brings me to tears most days. I don't miss doing anything particularly. I just miss my freedom. Im the only person I know who has breast fed. I have tons of support, that's not an issue. I just would like to be able to sleep for more than an hour at a time, come and go as I please (not neglecting him, just having that choice), walk around the house without a baby on me, even something as simple as watching a television program all by myself! I probably sound really selfish, but Its how I feel. And it's driving me crazy. Night time isn't so bad, I don't really mind it too much. We co-sleep, and use the side lying position, and that makes it very easy. But during the day I just...i don't know how else to explain it. It gets to the point where I am feeling negitively about having a baby, period. I love him more than anything in the world, but it's so difficult.

    I didn't realize it was so much work..Every day I just get more and more discouraged.

    I do like the idea of just pumping so I can get away for an hour or so. But I worry about if I don't have enough for him..then i'll have to just come home and do it all over again.

    I dont know how some moms BF til their kids are 2, I couldn't do it. Im afraid I wont even make it to my goal of 3 months.

  2. #12
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    10,440

    Default Re: EBF to pumping

    No, you sound like a first time mom. I was 30-something when had my first baby. And I was totally stunned tonfind that babies want mom All The Time.

    What helped was carving out chunks of time where I could be by myself. Even a trip to the store. A shower. That helped. I also learned how to babywear and then baby was happy and I went on with my life with baby attached to me. I learned a new hobby, and that helped with that stuck here bored feeling. Little things help.

    You are also running into the 6 week crunch. Many moms find they have a meltdown around 6 weeks. Just go day by day.

    I wanted to quit BFing every day for the first 2 months. Then one day, I was OK with things. And I did nurse that baby for 2 years.
    Susan
    Mama to my all-natural boys: Ian, 9-4-04, 11.5 lbs; Colton, 11-7-06, 9 lbs, in the water; Logan, 12-8-08, 9 lbs; Gavin, 1-18-11, 9 lbs; and an angel 1-15-06
    18+ months and for Gavin, born with an incomplete cleft lip and incomplete posterior cleft palate
    Sealed for time and eternity, 7-7-93
    Always babywearing, cosleeping and cloth diapering. Living with oppositional defiant disorder and ADHD. Ask me about cloth diapering and sewing your own diapers!

  3. #13
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    10,440

    Default Re: EBF to pumping

    Forgot..when you do need to leave, most BF babies take 1 to 1.5 oz per hour mom is away. So it's not all that much.
    Susan
    Mama to my all-natural boys: Ian, 9-4-04, 11.5 lbs; Colton, 11-7-06, 9 lbs, in the water; Logan, 12-8-08, 9 lbs; Gavin, 1-18-11, 9 lbs; and an angel 1-15-06
    18+ months and for Gavin, born with an incomplete cleft lip and incomplete posterior cleft palate
    Sealed for time and eternity, 7-7-93
    Always babywearing, cosleeping and cloth diapering. Living with oppositional defiant disorder and ADHD. Ask me about cloth diapering and sewing your own diapers!

  4. #14

    Default Re: EBF to pumping

    i also want to ask if you have had any thought about maybe some ppd? i have had it after all three of my babies and it didnt matter if i formula fed or bf. i didnt feel better until about 5mths after my daughter (no treatment) and now with my son i am on zoloft and things have been MUCH better. i didnt bond with my daughter until she was 4mths old. i felt like my life was over and i was overwhelmed so easily. she was premature and i formula fed her and she ate nonstop because she could only handle very little amounts at a time. i am breastfeeding this time and i still have ppd but this time i knew that its better to get treatment than to try to suffer through it. just a thought! it might not be what your going through but i know i could have written your post about 2mths ago
    It gets to the point where I am feeling negitively about having a baby, period. I love him more than anything in the world, but it's so difficult.

    I didn't realize it was so much work..Every day I just get more and more discouraged.


    Killian Patrick Oct 27 2006
    Brigid Noel April 13 2008 (formula fed and it was the worst experience ever!!!!!)
    Declan Charles March 28 2011

  5. #15
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    21,005

    Default Re: EBF to pumping

    at this point, I would consider introducing a bottle and some pumping into your routine and having someone else do a feeding or two a day. I know that being trapped under a baby is immensely challenging, psychologically, especially the first time. But it will not last forever! Newborn babies feed very frequently and take a long time to feed, and they aren't all that rewarding to nurse. It's just take, take, take! But as the baby gets older, he can go longer between feedings, he will shorten up his feeding times (by a few months old most babies can get a full meal in just 10 or so minutes at the breast), you'll be more confident about taking him out in public, and he'll start to give back. When your baby suddenly comes off the breast and gives you a huge milky grin- whoa! It's like he's saying "Thanks, Mom!"

    Do you have a swing? My kids were hard to put down, but they would both nap pretty well if I stuck them in the swing. And then I'd get an hour or so with no baby on my body.
    Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
    Coolest thing my little girl sang recently: "I love dat one-two pupples!"

  6. #16
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Posts
    219

    Default Re: EBF to pumping

    Dear Miguelsmommy,

    I probably won't have any new information in my post, but I wanted to share a little experience in case it helps you sort through some things.

    I EPed for my first (not by choice but because she could never learn to nurse directly from me). It was heartbreaking to me, and it was the hardest thing I've ever done. It seemed freeing when I stopped trying to breastfeed and pump at every session (though I kept trying to get her back to the breast, so I kept "failing" all the time, too), but pumping really wasn't freeing. I was in the house all the time pumping, washing, and feeding. I even had to take the pump with me to church every week (and sit in the nursing moms' room with my pump during the latter part of our service) because I couldn't go that long without pumping. The one time I tried a more sudden shift of schedule so that my husband and I could have a Valentine's dinner, I ended up with a plugged duct and severe mastitis when the pump couldn't unplug it.

    My second child had problems learning to nurse at first, but we persevered (long and kind of strange story), and it is so much more liberating to be nursing a baby rather than pumping for one. Quite frankly he's seventeen months now, and if I had been pumping, I would have quit early (I made it thirteen months with my daughter). I always had sore nipples, and I was trapped in the house. Now I get sore nipples if he bites or doesn't latch well, but it's not constant; we go to playgrounds and visit friends, and he just eats where we are.

    I don't want to sound like I'm pressuring you because I understand how overwhelmed you feel. I just want to give a reality check, so to speak, from a mom who's had both experiences. If you are serious about EPing, you might want to see if you can get the book Exclusively Pumping Breast Milk by Stephanie Casemore from the library and read it. It gives a good picture of what life might be like. It's also helpful in knowing how to manage its demands.

    Six weeks tends to be when lots of babies seem really fussy and most high-needs. They don't stop having needs after that, of course, but many become a little more easy to put down. A swing (cradle-type) really helped with my son.

    I think that a PP's idea of trying just one pumping and relief feeding every so often to see if it helps is a good idea. Also, is there anyone you can ask to come help hold the baby so that your hands are free for a little while when he's not nursing? Maybe a responsible teenage girl who's off of school for the summer?

    It's great that you've made it this far, and it's great that you're being honest about how hard it is to be a mom. Keep sharing how you're feeling, and you'll find plenty of people here who will help you through what you want to do.
    I breast milk fed my Blossom for fifteen months (after exclusively pumping for thirteen). My Bud (nineteen months) is still nursing directly (after a rough start that included a few months of pumping and supplementing with mommy's milk).

    TwoDewdrops: Nursing Dresses and Tops for Discreet Breastfeeding (and Pumping)

  7. #17
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Location
    Fort Lauderdale, FL
    Posts
    66

    Default Re: EBF to pumping

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*miguelsmommy529 View Post
    He is 5 1/2 weeks old. I swear his whole existence has been a growth spurt. I have a moby wrap, but am just too slow to figure it out.LOL
    I too have a moby wrap, but it wasn't easy for me to BF in. I purchased a Maya Ring sling, that works great for NIP and especially around the house. MY LO will be 6wks on Sunday and she's experiencing a growth spurt plus has bad gas =(

    I'm not experienced enough to know that EP is more work, but the few times I've used the pump that was given to me -- I immediately put it down. It was a weird experience and personally, I don't look forward to pumping when it's time to go back to work.

    good luck!
    Born Free, Breastfed & Cloth Diapered
    Miss Melanie Elyse
    5/29/11 @ 5:47pm
    7lbs-4oz & 19 inches


  8. #18
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Location
    Northern Cal.
    Posts
    4,984

    Default Re: EBF to pumping

    with PPs. Your feelings are normal and understandable. The hard part to wrap your head around (and I struggled a lot with breastfeeding at first too, so I feel you) is that it's not breastfeeding that causes this feeling of total overwhelm. Bottlefeeding moms get it too. It's having a newborn baby! It's just hard! Once I realized that, I was more okay with breastfeeding. And in the long run, breastfeeding will be FREEING, although that may seem hard to believe now. Breastfeeding a three month old is very different than breastfeeding a six week old, and you may find that you can continue past your goal. Similarly, breastfeeding a two year old (I have a two year old, he nurses like three times a day and then runs away to play) is WORLDS easier than a six week old, you know? Moms keep doing it because it changes, and gets easier. I think I can safely say that VERY FEW of us would still be nursing at two if two year olds were as intense and clingy as newborns! It's a whole different thing.

    Definitely pump for a bottle so that you can take a break and get out of the house! But if you can give yourself a goal of breastfeeding for a few more days/weeks ... just keep putting it off one more day ... that's how I survived the first eight weeks, by saying, "I'm going to totally quit ... tomorrow ... or next week, maybe!" And now I'm one of those crazy women who nurses a toddler!


    You can call me JoMo!

    Mom to baby boy Joe, born 5/4/09 and breastfed for more than two and a half years, and baby girl Maggie, born 7/9/12.

  9. #19
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Posts
    1,293

    Default Re: EBF to pumping

    Hi mama!
    I was 23 when I had my first son. I don't think I left my apt for at least 6 weeks. really. I was attached to my baby. Everything in my life changed and i never realized what being a mom was going to be like... no one does! That is one aspect of life that unites us all, motherhood is a complete surprise.

    My lo now nursed absolutely non stop for about 8 weeks. I did not mind at all this time around because i knew it was going to change. Honestly, now my son goes several hours without needing to nurse and it makes me a little sad. He is already changing and not in my arms all the time. I know you need a break mama, and you will get that one way or another. I just encourage you to keep nursing a part of your life. Don't let that go.

    night nursing rocks! plus when my son is cranky i give him a breast and hes happy! magic

    If you can have someone come over for a half hour so you can just take a relaxing shower ( you probably don't remember what that is ). Just a 1/2 hour would be nice and help you regroup. Does your baby have a time where he/she is less fussy? right after your first nursing session maybe?

    stick it out mama! you can do this.

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