These days, Joe often expresses a preference for cow's milk over mama milks, and it makes me feel so sad, and sometimes a little hurt when he turns down the breast.
I feel bad that I set so many limits on nursing, and I feel that I might have pushed him away a little too much (in my desire to avoid NIP, especially). But I do offer. So it has been his choice. For a long time, he was such a boob addict, I guess I never imagined he would voluntarily choose not to nurse before he was, I don't know, five?
DH, who is a stay-at-home-dad and has been very supportive of nursing, is nonetheless definitely encouraging him in the direction of weaning, and doesn't seem to understand my mixed feelings. From his perspective, Joe is over two, and obviously he's not going to nurse forever, what is my problem? It's hard for me to argue, especially since DH puts in a lot more hours parenting than I do. I understand that with my schedule (I have to attend night meetings a couple times a month), it's a lot easier for DH if he can put Joe to bed with cow's milk. And now he's learned to expect/prefer it, and he specifically asks for dad to put him to bed. (Who knew this was even possible?)
So now he really only nurses when he wakes up at night and in the early morning. I realize he could keep doing that for a very long time yet, and just because he only nurses a couple times a day doesn't mean he will wean right away. I never thought I would miss him constantly wanting to be in my lap, but I do. One aspect of Joe's toddlerhood seems to be an extreme DH-attachment, and now he rejects me (and my milkies) pretty frequently. Obviously, these things ebb and flow and you can't take it personally, but wow, it's harder than I expected!
I am really glad that Joe is sleeping better, and that he now goes to bed peacefully for DH. I just didn't realize that was going to mean that he would reject the breast.
Gah! MIXED FEELINGS. My baby is growing up!
Thanks for listening.