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Thread: Cosleeping safety

  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2011
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    57

    Default Cosleeping safety

    I have a couple of questions.

    1. I have read that it is safer for babies to sleep between their mother and the bed rail. Is it unsafe for my husband and son to nap together in our bed? Why shouldn't babies sleep between their parents?

    2. What do you do about the gap between the mattress and headboard? I push our mattress all the way up, but it works its way down again. Sometimes there is a 2-inch gap.

    3. How far away do you keep your night stand from the bed?

    4. What safety measures do you take when spending the night with relatives or at hotels?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Location
    Northern Cal.
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    4,984

    Default Re: Cosleeping safety

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*mandy314 View Post
    I have a couple of questions.

    1. I have read that it is safer for babies to sleep between their mother and the bed rail. Is it unsafe for my husband and son to nap together in our bed? Why shouldn't babies sleep between their parents?

    2. What do you do about the gap between the mattress and headboard? I push our mattress all the way up, but it works its way down again. Sometimes there is a 2-inch gap.

    3. How far away do you keep your night stand from the bed?

    4. What safety measures do you take when spending the night with relatives or at hotels?
    I think the rec that baby sleep on mom's side is based on some evidence that dads aren't as sensitive to their baby's presence in their sleep (bc I guess women are hardwired for this, biologically). However, I slept with Joe on both sides of me, alternating back and forth all night. My DH is a light sleeper and always stirred when Joe stirred. I think it just depends on your husband's sleeping patterns. I always kept my arm over Joe when we coslept (when he was a newborn - now he's all over the bed and our biggest fear is that he will hurt us, not the other way around! ) so I would have woken up if DH rolled into him.

    I never did anything about the gap between the mattress and the headboard myself, but then, I kept Joe at my breast, and under my arm, all night every night. You could put a piece of hard foam in that gap to seal it up.

    I had a bedrail on my side, and a nightstand on the other side of that. I was never worried about that.

    When we'd sleep at hotels or in strange beds, I would (a) keep Joe between us for more of the night; (b) if it was a friend's house, I might put the bed against the wall or put the mattress on the floor; (c) put pillows on the floor on my side to catch him if he did fall (which happened a few times, mostly when he was older and mobile and crawled off the bed). I admit, I never slept that well like this. I never really went into a deep sleep, because I'd be worried about Joe falling off the bed. Not that restful (but this is why my husband and I joked that we practiced co-no-sleeping ). Still, I loved the convenience of not needing a travel crib or anything like that. Just pick up the baby and go!


    You can call me JoMo!

    Mom to baby boy Joe, born 5/4/09 and breastfed for more than two and a half years, and baby girl Maggie, born 7/9/12.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
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    Default Re: Cosleeping safety

    I basically could have written the post above. (minus having a bedrail)
    I'm Hillary
    Wife to Gualberto
    Mom to Nolan
    Born at 32 weeks-3lbs/10oz
    11-25-2007
    Our precious early angel


    Remember, you are not managing an inconvenience; You are raising a human being ~ Kittie Frantz
    Unthinking respect for authority is the greatest enemy of truth ~ Albert Einstein
    First they ignore you, then they ridicule you, then they fight you, then you win ~ Mahatma Gandhi
    Looking for more information about vaccines?

  4. #4
    Join Date
    May 2009
    Posts
    126

    Default Re: Cosleeping safety

    I agree with pp's, really it depends on how sensitive your DH is to the baby. My DH is a really heavy sleeper, but we had cats and a small dog for years. They always slept on the bed and beside both of us. He never rolled on them, so I figured he'd be just as aware (really more aware) of a baby.
    I would curl up around DD's when they were really little, but in general they'd switch sides from time to time during the night. Rather than use a bed rail, we used pillows set a few feet back from the baby. I always figured that when they were really little, they wouldn't be able to roll onto them and as they got older, it wasn't as much of a concern. But I also slept with DD's against me and with my arm around them when they were really little.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
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    Northern Cal.
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    Default Re: Cosleeping safety

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*nolies.mama View Post
    I basically could have written the post above. (minus having a bedrail)
    If our bed was bigger (or if it was set on the floor), I probably wouldn't have wanted the bedrail, but since we sleep in a queen, it's a little tight, and the extra security was nice.


    You can call me JoMo!

    Mom to baby boy Joe, born 5/4/09 and breastfed for more than two and a half years, and baby girl Maggie, born 7/9/12.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
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    Default Re: Cosleeping safety

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*joe.s.mom View Post
    If our bed was bigger (or if it was set on the floor), I probably wouldn't have wanted the bedrail, but since we sleep in a queen, it's a little tight, and the extra security was nice.
    ...we have a king so very spacious.

    Oh, and we moved our bed to the floor in the very beginning. I felt more comfortable that way.
    I'm Hillary
    Wife to Gualberto
    Mom to Nolan
    Born at 32 weeks-3lbs/10oz
    11-25-2007
    Our precious early angel


    Remember, you are not managing an inconvenience; You are raising a human being ~ Kittie Frantz
    Unthinking respect for authority is the greatest enemy of truth ~ Albert Einstein
    First they ignore you, then they ridicule you, then they fight you, then you win ~ Mahatma Gandhi
    Looking for more information about vaccines?

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