Happy Mothers Breastfed Babies
Page 1 of 3 123 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 26

Thread: rejected...

  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Posts
    74

    Default rejected...

    So after 12 weeks of breastfeeding, I've been rejected. In the beginning we had to give the LO bottles alternating with breastfeeding because she was jaundiced. But pretty much from 4 weeks on she was exclusively breastfed up until last week when we did trial runs with my mom giving her bottles since I would be returning to work next week. but it was only a few a day and she still took the breast ok and all weekend and yesterday was just breastfeeding. Then last night for her 7pm feed she rejected the breast. I tried for another 2 hours before finally giving her a bottle which she took 3 oz. I let her sleep and woke her up around 3am to try to eat. She took the breast for 2 min and then we struggled for another 30 min when I finally gave up and gave her another bottle.

    Isn't it too late for nipple confusion? Did she just decide she likes the bottle better? Has this happened to anyone else? How can I get her to take the breast again?

    I'm so sad she won't take the breast

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    Posts
    2,616

    Default Re: rejected...

    http://www.kellymom.com/bf/concerns/...to-breast.html

    Nursing strikes are painfully common, I want to say especially in babies who get bottles but they're not the only ones. My daughter had a nursing strike that lasted much longer than typical and I had to pump since she refused any time she was awake. This went on for 5 months but don't worry about that because many babies only strike for a day or two. That link has many helpful ideas for getting baby to nurse. What worked for us was nursing when she was basically asleep before she would wake up - not nursing her TO sleep, if she was fully awake she wouldn't nurse. If she's not nursing you will want to pump so you keep your supply up but keep trying to get her back to breast. Please read that link, Kelly Mom has a great site full of research-based information!
    Nursed my sweet daughter 3 years, 3 mos.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Location
    Louisiana
    Posts
    1

    Default Re: rejected...

    I agree.
    Also I would suggest not giving your baby a bottle when you are home, your LO will take the breast if the bottle is not an option. And she will take the bottle when you are not an option. Some babies will drink hardly anything when they are away from momma and then make up when they get to be around the breast. Your LO may have noticed that the milk comes out faster with the bottle than with the breast- on the breast she has to work for her milk but on the bottle it comes out a lot easier. Make sure you are using a slow flow bottle nipple. Offer her the breast and nothing else while you are home, she will eat when she gets hungry enough and knows that she doesn't have another option if she refuses the breast. Rewarding her behavior with a bottle when she refuses the breast may be what she is wanting. She will eventually start taking the breast again, do not give up! Just keep offering it to her, and if she doesn't take if for a few hours and you get too full- just pump and store it for her. Do not give it to her in a bottle- keep offering your breast. Don't give up, it is just a phase and it will soon pass.
    Lovin my lil titi monster!

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    Posts
    2,616

    Default Re: rejected...

    Well, I don't entirely agree with starving a child to the breast, it may just make them angrier. I tried to just nurse nurse nurse my daughter when she was having problems and she just ended up losing weight and becoming very lethargic. You have to feed the baby more than she needs milk straight from you, she needs milk. I wouldn't force the issue because you really can't force a baby to nurse and it will just make her more upset. Offer it, but if she refuses then just casually close up your shirt and try again.
    Nursed my sweet daughter 3 years, 3 mos.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Posts
    74

    Default Re: rejected...

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*krystine View Post
    Well, I don't entirely agree with starving a child to the breast, it may just make them angrier. I tried to just nurse nurse nurse my daughter when she was having problems and she just ended up losing weight and becoming very lethargic. You have to feed the baby more than she needs milk straight from you, she needs milk. I wouldn't force the issue because you really can't force a baby to nurse and it will just make her more upset. Offer it, but if she refuses then just casually close up your shirt and try again.
    Thank you both for your replies. I didn't know there was a such a thing as a nursing strike! That makes me feel a bit better. I kept racking my brain for might be going on! I have to agree with you Krystine, I would never make my baby starve...the two hours I waited for her to want to nurse, I attempted to give her a bottle but she used to not take one while I was around...so I wasn't sure if she didn't like the thawed milk, so I pumped fresh and left the house. Then she promptly took 3 oz. Then I started to get concerned about what I was going to do overnight! I couldnt' possibly leave for every feed. But she then took the bottle from me at the next feed...and then...she breastfed the next two feeds asleep. So I hope our strike was very short lived...but we will see at the next feed. I'm anxious to see what she will do. So I'll keep at it.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Posts
    6,564

    Default Re: rejected...

    Are you feeding your baby on a schedule? Do you think it's possible that she just wasn't hungry at 7 pm?

    Some days when I get home from work, my baby wants to nurse, sometimes not. Then I try again later.
    Tracie

    Mommy to
    Lilah 10/08 nursed 25 months
    Beatrix 01/11 nursed 30 months

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    COUGARTOWN Baby! From here on in!
    Posts
    17,406

    Default Re: rejected...

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*krystine View Post
    Well, I don't entirely agree with starving a child to the breast, it may just make them angrier. I tried to just nurse nurse nurse my daughter when she was having problems and she just ended up losing weight and becoming very lethargic. You have to feed the baby more than she needs milk straight from you, she needs milk. I wouldn't force the issue because you really can't force a baby to nurse and it will just make her more upset. Offer it, but if she refuses then just casually close up your shirt and try again.
    I don't think this is a fair way to categorize dealing with a nursing strike. Because you CAN cause nipple confusion AND end up with early weanings if you cave and give a bottle. And you don't need to and your child won't starve. A striking child often doesn't know that they are striking or why. Eating is instinctual. So even if a child is striking they will eat while asleep, and when sleepy. At 12 weeks old most children are still taking AT LEAST 2 naps a day if not 3. On Two naps a day if you are able to get a child to nurse down and up and then again to go down for the night and at least one night feeding (and often you will get more dream feeds) that is ENOUGH. It still is hard to deal with rejection and not to take it personally. But you DO NOT have to put the added pressure on yourself that if you don't cave and give a bottle that your child will starve. You need to feed 6-8times in a 24hour period. Even though it SEEMS like way less when they strike, if you are diligent about feeding a sleepy and sleeping child they will get enough milk. Without you feeling like you HAVE to give a bottle.

    Way too lazy for formula

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    Posts
    2,616

    Default Re: rejected...

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*djs.mom View Post
    I don't think this is a fair way to categorize dealing with a nursing strike. Because you CAN cause nipple confusion AND end up with early weanings if you cave and give a bottle. And you don't need to and your child won't starve. A striking child often doesn't know that they are striking or why. Eating is instinctual. So even if a child is striking they will eat while asleep, and when sleepy. At 12 weeks old most children are still taking AT LEAST 2 naps a day if not 3. On Two naps a day if you are able to get a child to nurse down and up and then again to go down for the night and at least one night feeding (and often you will get more dream feeds) that is ENOUGH. It still is hard to deal with rejection and not to take it personally. But you DO NOT have to put the added pressure on yourself that if you don't cave and give a bottle that your child will starve. You need to feed 6-8times in a 24hour period. Even though it SEEMS like way less when they strike, if you are diligent about feeding a sleepy and sleeping child they will get enough milk. Without you feeling like you HAVE to give a bottle.
    I guess I didn't give enough information, for our personal situation, my daughter was starving with just nursing, She needed me to pump for her from the beginning because she had very poor milk removal. We worked with IBCLCs her entire first year. She nursed 1 to 1.5 oz each session and then I followed with pumped milk. Just saying just nurse all the time did not work for her, it must work for many babies who are good at removing milk but not all. Even when she was not on a nursing strike, she was unable to nurse without supplementing with pumped milk until she was close to a year old and eating enough solids to make up for her difficulty.

    So I am happy for the moms who don't need to pump around the clock and their babies get enough milk. The fact is that not all babies can and some moms do need to work extra hard to get their baby milk.
    Nursed my sweet daughter 3 years, 3 mos.

  9. #9
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Posts
    74

    Default Re: rejected...

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*mommy2lilah View Post
    Are you feeding your baby on a schedule? Do you think it's possible that she just wasn't hungry at 7 pm?

    Some days when I get home from work, my baby wants to nurse, sometimes not. Then I try again later.
    I feed the baby roughly every 3 hours because she's usually hungry around then if not before. So 7pm was 3 hrs after her last feed. She cried and fought everytime I tried to put her to the breast up until 9pm. Which was when I left and she right away took 3oz from a bottle. So what does that mean?

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    COUGARTOWN Baby! From here on in!
    Posts
    17,406

    Default Re: rejected...

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*krystine View Post
    I guess I didn't give enough information, for our personal situation, my daughter was starving with just nursing, She needed me to pump for her from the beginning because she had very poor milk removal. We worked with IBCLCs her entire first year. She nursed 1 to 1.5 oz each session and then I followed with pumped milk. Just saying just nurse all the time did not work for her, it must work for many babies who are good at removing milk but not all. Even when she was not on a nursing strike, she was unable to nurse without supplementing with pumped milk until she was close to a year old and eating enough solids to make up for her difficulty.

    So I am happy for the moms who don't need to pump around the clock and their babies get enough milk. The fact is that not all babies can and some moms do need to work extra hard to get their baby milk.
    OK. But that sounds like something entirely different. If you were having latch/removal issues and always pumped and topped off, that's different. (And incredibly dedicated. I am so glad yo did this for your baby.) But a child who has been EBF up until this point is striking. And I don't want the mother of a striking child who WAS removing milk just fine and is now simply refusing the breast to feel like they MUST bottle feed to get enough in their baby. Because of you do the math and diligently feed the sleepy/sleeping child, it can be done. I have known people who have worked through LOOONG strikes and multiple strikes. And were able to get their babies to eat enough just in correlation with their sleep times.

    Way too lazy for formula

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •