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Thread: Actively Weaning

  1. #41
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
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    Default Re: Actively Weaning

    That's great Teal and Katie!

    I agree Beth, I don't think that people who nurse 7 or 8 years old are crazies... I'm just not sure I want to be part of that club.

    I really wish I had set limits on Lilah's nursing sooner than I did. I think it would have been more pleasant for ME. But, it was also the only time I got to sit down once she hit about 15 months.
    Tracie

    Mommy to
    Lilah 10/08 nursed 25 months
    Beatrix 01/11 nursed 30 months

  2. #42
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
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    Default Re: Actively Weaning

    I actively weaned Emma...she dropped only the very last nursing session, at 3 yrs 8 mos so she could go to The Great Wolf Lodge for an overnight. I really struggled with nursing her once she hit 2 1/2 yrs old, but let her once or twice a day for that last year, although there were times when she would skip it for a few days. As far as how I feel about it - I'm ok with how it went...I wish it came from her a little more, but I honestly know I did what I could and hung on as long as I could. 10 months later and she wishes she could nurse, but when I've let her try she doesn't remember how to latch and she cries saying she misses nursing. I let her snuggle up to my breasts though. She brought me my breastpump the other day and asked me to pump some milk into a cup for her so she can taste it again, but I haven't yet.

    I've actively weaned Owen a bit so far...I started when he was just over 2 yrs old with nightweaning him. In the last 4 months I've got him down to morning, before nap, and before bed. I think we'll be at that for a bit. Even thought it's been a few months since he nursed during the night, he still asks for it and yells at me when I tell him he can nurse in the morning. DH is all for extended nursing, and actually didn't want me to wean Emma when I did, but with Owen and our night-time issues lately, he has said a few times maybe he'd do better at night if I weaned him completely. But, he also says he thinks that would be really hard on him, because he REALLY is almost desperate for those 3 sessions.
    Mommy to:

    Emmalynn Marie
    Born at 37 weeks on 12/22/06
    5lbs 1oz 19 1/2in

    Owen Charles
    Born at 29 wks 6 days on 01/17/09
    2lbs 14oz 15in
    In NICU for 2 months


  3. #43
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    Jan 2008
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    1,081

    Default Re: Actively Weaning

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*amy.marie View Post
    So far today they have both nursed 3 times. My nipples are killing me. If I wasn't so sore all the time I might be able to tough it out longer. I really really want to be done. But then the guilt kicks in.

    How do you do what's best for you when it feels wrong for them?
    I am really, really sore too. I'm assuming it's because Owen's latch has never been great and now he's getting lazy with it too.

    I had a ton of guilt when weaning Emma. I desperately wanted to be done when she was 2 1/2 yrs old and stuck it out until she was 3 yrs 8 mos. I was back and forth about whether it was the right thing to do a lot during that last year of nursing her, and looking back I honestly think that played a HUGE part in why she took so long to give up that last session...because even though I really wanted to be done nursing her, I also knew it woud mean she'd be done nursing forever. The finality of it was hard for me. And so I think she sensed that and that's part of why it lasted so long. I had this ideal in my mind of complete child-led weaning, and felt so guilty for not doing it. But eventually, I realized I just couldn't do that ideal weaning, but that didn't mean I was an unresponsive mother, either. There IS a middle ground. She DID nurse for 3 yrs 8 mos, which is great and she had plenty of other ways of being close with me. And being a mother does mean being very giving of yourself, but it doesn't mean you should give EVERYTHING to your kids at your own expense. My sanity was important to keep, so we dangled a big reward in front of her and she took it. She nursed one last time that morning, with her brother as she requested, and then said "mom, thanks for letting me nurse so long, you're the best mom in the whole world." And we were done. It was good and it was ok.

    I get the feeling of "short-changing" the second kid too. Owen nurses more at this age than Emma did, but I don't see us going for another 15 months, to make it as long as she nursed. But, I think that's ok too. He is still getting the benefits of extended nursing, and what was right for Emma in the situation we were in at the time may not be what's right for Owen where we're at with things now.

    Have you tried offering something else in place of nursing sessions? That didn't work with Emma (until using a big reward for dropping the last session) but it does work with many kids. I was a little worried about how it would go with Owen still nursing when Emma finally weaned, and it actually was fine...I explained that she had nursed for the right amount of time for she and I, but that he just hadn't yet, and eventually there would be a right amount of time for he and I, too.
    Mommy to:

    Emmalynn Marie
    Born at 37 weeks on 12/22/06
    5lbs 1oz 19 1/2in

    Owen Charles
    Born at 29 wks 6 days on 01/17/09
    2lbs 14oz 15in
    In NICU for 2 months


  4. #44
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
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    2,944

    Default Re: Actively Weaning

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*jenniebean5 View Post
    I actively weaned Emma...she dropped only the very last nursing session, at 3 yrs 8 mos so she could go to The Great Wolf Lodge for an overnight. I really struggled with nursing her once she hit 2 1/2 yrs old, but let her once or twice a day for that last year, although there were times when she would skip it for a few days. As far as how I feel about it - I'm ok with how it went...I wish it came from her a little more, but I honestly know I did what I could and hung on as long as I could. 10 months later and she wishes she could nurse, but when I've let her try she doesn't remember how to latch and she cries saying she misses nursing. I let her snuggle up to my breasts though. She brought me my breastpump the other day and asked me to pump some milk into a cup for her so she can taste it again, but I haven't yet.
    The bolded is how I've been feeling lately. I feel ok with weaning my DD for the past couple of days. I feel like I've stuck it out 30 wks into pregnancy, nursing a 3 yo who forgets how to latch. I am so sure that she's not going to forget about it either.
    Proud mom of 2:
    DD 5/2008 nursed for 3 years and 3 months.
    DS born 8/2011 nursing like a champ

    Sorry for the short responses...always, always, always NAK or holding a baby

  5. #45
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    Default Re: Actively Weaning

    Here comes the bittersweet part: Lulu woke up from her nap, patted a boob and said, "I nursed already. need snack now" and gave me a kiss.

    Mama to my little Diva: Miss K (7/15/06)
    And her little sister: Lulu Pie (3/21/09)

    "Don't toush da mango"
    One-handed typer Extraordinaire!
    My body creates, houses, nurtures and nourishes life. That is awesome.
    Kegel Kop says: TIGHTEN UP!

  6. #46
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    Jan 2008
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    Default Re: Actively Weaning

    Just saw this! I was just about to post that we are officially done We were just like you...down to one in the early morning. I will come back and read this thread more closely and maybe share more, but just wanted to say you've got a weaning buddy


    Jeanne (my middle name IRL)


    Mommy to two girls (M & M), born Sept. '07 and Sept. '09

  7. #47
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    Nov 2008
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    Default Re: Actively Weaning

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*mothersky View Post
    Here comes the bittersweet part: Lulu woke up from her nap, patted a boob and said, "I nursed already. need snack now" and gave me a kiss.
    Proud mom of 2:
    DD 5/2008 nursed for 3 years and 3 months.
    DS born 8/2011 nursing like a champ

    Sorry for the short responses...always, always, always NAK or holding a baby

  8. #48
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    Default Re: Actively Weaning

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*jeannie.bean View Post
    Just saw this! I was just about to post that we are officially done We were just like you...down to one in the early morning. I will come back and read this thread more closely and maybe share more, but just wanted to say you've got a weaning buddy
    Thanks mama.

    Mama to my little Diva: Miss K (7/15/06)
    And her little sister: Lulu Pie (3/21/09)

    "Don't toush da mango"
    One-handed typer Extraordinaire!
    My body creates, houses, nurtures and nourishes life. That is awesome.
    Kegel Kop says: TIGHTEN UP!

  9. #49
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    Jun 2008
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    TX
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    Default Re: Actively Weaning



    I don't know where we are, exactly. Wyatt has definitely given up his nighttime nursies. 100%. But he still asks once a day most days, at varying times, and I am granting his request (except for once when he asked at a really bad time, and I put him off, but then later I offered a make-up session to him, which he seemed grateful for). He seems to be "checking [my] nursies" now, much more frequently, which I think fulfills his desire for them without actually nursing. He will ask to check my nursies and then cup his hands around them, gently put his fingers on either side of my nipple, eye them VERY closely, and then say "kind of fine." He still seems super into them, but less like he needs them for nursing, and more like he just needs them. I think we're pretty close to him moving on entirely.
    Teal

    25 May 96 and 14 January 08 and 27 February 2012

  10. #50
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    Default Re: Actively Weaning

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*duckpond View Post


    I don't know where we are, exactly. Wyatt has definitely given up his nighttime nursies. 100%. But he still asks once a day most days, at varying times, and I am granting his request (except for once when he asked at a really bad time, and I put him off, but then later I offered a make-up session to him, which he seemed grateful for). He seems to be "checking [my] nursies" now, much more frequently, which I think fulfills his desire for them without actually nursing. He will ask to check my nursies and then cup his hands around them, gently put his fingers on either side of my nipple, eye them VERY closely, and then say "kind of fine." He still seems super into them, but less like he needs them for nursing, and more like he just needs them. I think we're pretty close to him moving on entirely.


    Lulu likes to hold them, especially when tired.

    Mama to my little Diva: Miss K (7/15/06)
    And her little sister: Lulu Pie (3/21/09)

    "Don't toush da mango"
    One-handed typer Extraordinaire!
    My body creates, houses, nurtures and nourishes life. That is awesome.
    Kegel Kop says: TIGHTEN UP!

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