Happy Mothers Breastfed Babies
Results 1 to 8 of 8

Thread: 27 m.o. fights bedtime! Suggestions?

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Location
    NYC
    Posts
    101

    Default 27 m.o. fights bedtime! Suggestions?

    First of all, a big thanks to all my LLLI sisters who stuck by me through these years. We're still nursing. Yay!
    Problem: he's fighting bedtime. Doesn't want to sleep.
    Proud Momma to Emmanuel Stephen (2/14/09).

    22 months and counting!
    :

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Posts
    1,081

    Default Re: 27 m.o. fights bedtime! Suggestions?

    What is your bedtime routine? We have always had a consistent bedtime routine with our kids. My son is 28 months, and here's how it looks for us. Dinner is followed by a bath, pjs, and brushing teeth. This usually takes between 30-45 mins. Then we read stories and then he and I go into his room and I nurse him in his rocking chair. I talk to him/sing to him during nursing to keep him awake. It's somewhere between 7-7:30pm when we go into his room to nurse, depending on what time he got up from nap. (If he gets up from nap by 2:30 then we go in his room at 7, but if he doesn't get up until 3 then we go in at 7:30.) Lately I am decreasing the length of night-time nursing sessions, so I will sometimes sing a song of his choice a few times while he nurses on each side. Then I rock him for a few more minutes since he requests it and then put him in his bed and rub his back for a few minutes. Then I sit in his rocking chair while he falls asleep or if he wants his dad to, then he comes in and sits in the chair while he falls asleep.

    I have found with both my kids that being consistent with a bedtime routine helps them a lot. I rocked/nursed my son to sleep until recently, and am working on him falling asleep with less help from us...eventually I'd like to be able to leave the room with him awake, but I'm going slow with it.

    Anyways, this is what works for us!
    Mommy to:

    Emmalynn Marie
    Born at 37 weeks on 12/22/06
    5lbs 1oz 19 1/2in

    Owen Charles
    Born at 29 wks 6 days on 01/17/09
    2lbs 14oz 15in
    In NICU for 2 months


  3. #3
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    Posts
    806

    Default Re: 27 m.o. fights bedtime! Suggestions?

    my first Q that could save tons of speculation is: does he still take a nap? if the answer is "yes", it could be time to drop the nap. that's how it worked in this house, anyway. and it happened right at 2 yrs.
    the best food blog you aren't reading

    i'm beth, mama to:

    lila, 11/6/08, nursed until 2yrs 10 mos, weaned during pregnancy

    -and-

    max, 2/16/12, my huge new little nursling

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Location
    NYC
    Posts
    101

    Default Re: 27 m.o. fights bedtime! Suggestions?

    OK. my baby but yes, he takes a nap at daycare. However, he's extremely inconsistent. Unfortunately, once in a while when he misses his nap it's because he had a really late night the night before and so he got up way too late (10 am or 9:30). Those days he's fallen asleep on the way home (either in the car or stroller--we're 5-10 min walk from daycare). Then he'll wake up at 3 or 4 am and not go back to sleep until 8 or so, when I have to go to work and on and on goes the terrible schedule.

    When he does have "normal" nights the only way to get him to sleep is to let him nurse until he's exhausted and that takes up to 2 hours. Our schedule IS very regular. Dinner around 6-6:30 as soon as he's back from daycare, watching trucks or songs on the internet and then bath at 7:30 and in jim jams by 8. We have recently started hiding the computers after his bath and going to the bedroom to read a few books (2-3). Then, within 15 min or so he wants to nurse (we lie in bed for this). The problem is this: he switches back and forth between breasts every few seconds and this is tiring for me as I have to shift so many times 20-30 times or more. Then he starts climbing over me while latched on and when he tumbles all over a few times I suggest going to the bouncing chair (ikea chair). I figure he's restless lying down. He proceeds the switcharoo until he's persuaded there's no more milk at all (we also offer rice drink and he has 2 oz of this also but always wants to go back to the breast). On the best of nights he'll fall asleep by 9:30 or 10 pm by which time I'm nodding off and feeling dizzy from tiredness. Mostly he'll fall asleep while latched on but most times I've just had to tell him there's no more milk and that it's sleep time (he cries at that but I just tell him I am sorry about this several times and he calms down and eventually drifts off while I bounce him). Last couple of nights he actually stopped nursing at the end and laid his head on my shoulder until he was almost asleep. He came down to nurse a few more seconds at the end and fell asleep while nursing. I put him down after he's drifted off.

    Never mind that he nurses 2-3 times overnight and when it's close to dawn he'll nurse continuously back and forth between breasts for about 1-2 hours and wakes me up. He usually wakes up around 8 (if I'm lucky he'll sleep deeply the last 30 min. or so and I get to rest a bit before I get up).

    Why isn't he sleeping longer overnight? I was doing 11-12 hours straight until I was 7 or 8 and you could not get me up before that. I slept straight through the night after I was 5 (I had asthma and my parents did not know what it was so I would wake up coughing a lot before that). I thought babies need to sleep more! He only does 1-1.5 hours at around 1:30 or so at daycare.

    Proud Momma to Emmanuel Stephen (2/14/09).

    22 months and counting!
    :

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Feb 2010
    Posts
    504

    Default Re: 27 m.o. fights bedtime! Suggestions?

    Sorry you're so tired, mama. I agree with PP that a consistent routine is best, and it sounds like you're trying to do that. I know that with a lot of babies, and definately with my DS (21 months) he sleeps better at night when he is going into the night well-rested. In other words, if he's overly tired, he is more restless. Thus, we keep a strict 7pm bedtime, no matter what, and if his nap was too short during the day, it's closer to 6:30pm. Now my DS is an early bird and won't sleep in late in the morning, so the early bedtime is also necessary because of that. Without fail, if he gets to bed too late (any time past 7pm) he inevitably is more restless at night and wakes up even earlier in the morning. So I guess my suggestion is to try a much earlier bedtime (given that it takes him a while to settle down) so that he is actually FALLING ASLEEP earlier. Even if that means starting to "wind down" around 5 or 6. A lot of people think I'm crazy because my 21 month old goes to bed between 6:30 and 7, but he needs it, so that's what we do! Hope that helps
    Blessed with DS - born 9/2/09 - nursed/pumped for 12 months
    Blessed with DD - born 3/27/12 my dreamfeeder

    903 ounces donated.
    http://www.wakemed.org/landing.cfm?id=135

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Posts
    1,081

    Default Re: 27 m.o. fights bedtime! Suggestions?

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*emmanuel.s.mom View Post
    OK. my baby but yes, he takes a nap at daycare. However, he's extremely inconsistent. Unfortunately, once in a while when he misses his nap it's because he had a really late night the night before and so he got up way too late (10 am or 9:30). Those days he's fallen asleep on the way home (either in the car or stroller--we're 5-10 min walk from daycare). Then he'll wake up at 3 or 4 am and not go back to sleep until 8 or so, when I have to go to work and on and on goes the terrible schedule.

    When he does have "normal" nights the only way to get him to sleep is to let him nurse until he's exhausted and that takes up to 2 hours. Our schedule IS very regular. Dinner around 6-6:30 as soon as he's back from daycare, watching trucks or songs on the internet and then bath at 7:30 and in jim jams by 8. We have recently started hiding the computers after his bath and going to the bedroom to read a few books (2-3). Then, within 15 min or so he wants to nurse (we lie in bed for this). The problem is this: he switches back and forth between breasts every few seconds and this is tiring for me as I have to shift so many times 20-30 times or more. Then he starts climbing over me while latched on and when he tumbles all over a few times I suggest going to the bouncing chair (ikea chair). I figure he's restless lying down. He proceeds the switcharoo until he's persuaded there's no more milk at all (we also offer rice drink and he has 2 oz of this also but always wants to go back to the breast). On the best of nights he'll fall asleep by 9:30 or 10 pm by which time I'm nodding off and feeling dizzy from tiredness. Mostly he'll fall asleep while latched on but most times I've just had to tell him there's no more milk and that it's sleep time (he cries at that but I just tell him I am sorry about this several times and he calms down and eventually drifts off while I bounce him). Last couple of nights he actually stopped nursing at the end and laid his head on my shoulder until he was almost asleep. He came down to nurse a few more seconds at the end and fell asleep while nursing. I put him down after he's drifted off.

    Never mind that he nurses 2-3 times overnight and when it's close to dawn he'll nurse continuously back and forth between breasts for about 1-2 hours and wakes me up. He usually wakes up around 8 (if I'm lucky he'll sleep deeply the last 30 min. or so and I get to rest a bit before I get up).

    Why isn't he sleeping longer overnight? I was doing 11-12 hours straight until I was 7 or 8 and you could not get me up before that. I slept straight through the night after I was 5 (I had asthma and my parents did not know what it was so I would wake up coughing a lot before that). I thought babies need to sleep more! He only does 1-1.5 hours at around 1:30 or so at daycare.

    Wow...you are one patient mama with nursing to sleep at night! I personally can't handle the switching sides over and over, so it's one time on each side and that's it. My son is pretty used to this, but on the occasion he asks to switch again I tell him he can in the morning.

    Here's my suggestions - for a little while, prepare dinners ahead of time so you just have to reheat them to eat - this will allow you to have dinners earlier than you are able to now. So if you get home at 6pm, try to be eating dinner by 6:30pm. Then into the tub by 7pm and by 7:30 tub is done, jammies are on, and teeth are brushed. That will be one very busy 90 minutes, I know. Then read stories until 7:45 and then let him nurse. Some ways you can cut down on nursing time is explain to him he can nurse one time from each side and that's it. You can also sing a song and he can nurse until the song is done. I do this with my son right now as I'm trying to really shorten how long he nurses before bed, so he picks the song (usually Twinkle Twinkle) and I sing it while he nurses, once per side. I do sing it slower than normal. So he's actually only nursing for a few minutes. I rock him for a few more minutes and then put him in his bed and rub his back.

    Obviously it's up to you any changes you make, but if you do decide to change up your routine expect him to be unhappy about it...2 yr olds like to be in charge and change is hard. But consistency and persistence are key.

    Another option - after bath read stories somewhere besides his bedroom and then let him nurse, then brush his teeth and put him in his bed. This may help lessen his association with nursing to sleep. And if it's an option, have your SO take him after brushing teeth and handle the falling asleep in his bedroom part.

    I definitely think if you can start your bedtime earlier and lessen the amount of time he's nursing, he will learn to fall asleep faster. Also, his naps at daycare - I'd ask that he not sleep past 2:30pm, at least not for a little while as you're getting him used to an earlier bedtime.

    Good luck mama!
    Mommy to:

    Emmalynn Marie
    Born at 37 weeks on 12/22/06
    5lbs 1oz 19 1/2in

    Owen Charles
    Born at 29 wks 6 days on 01/17/09
    2lbs 14oz 15in
    In NICU for 2 months


  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Location
    NYC
    Posts
    101

    Default Re: 27 m.o. fights bedtime! Suggestions?

    Thank you all for the suggestions! I did try for a while an earlier bedtime but he turned it into a nap (would get up an hour-two later and be bright as anything and ready to play). By the next time he'd be sleepy we would go back to bed so tired around 11 pm or midnight. Then onto a horrible next day.

    Another problem is visits to grandma: we go at 1-2 pm on Saturdays and I pick him and dad up at 6:30 or 7 pm. He falls asleep in the car, sometimes both ways (30 min drive) and when we come back by 7:30 he's up and ready to go! That throws whatever progress we've made that week out the window.

    I'll try the earlier bedtime this week as I'm home and watch and pray...
    Proud Momma to Emmanuel Stephen (2/14/09).

    22 months and counting!
    :

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Location
    NYC
    Posts
    101

    Default Re: 27 m.o. fights bedtime! Suggestions?

    After a series of late nights and 3 a.m. risings, DS suddenly had about 10 new words in his vocabulary. Reminds me of something I've read here before... When they have breakthroughs in their development they have strange wakings, or something along those lines... That would certainly explain why he just didn't want to sleep. He did have better nights after this milestone... Does anyone know more?
    Proud Momma to Emmanuel Stephen (2/14/09).

    22 months and counting!
    :

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •