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Thread: Husband wants formula supplement so he can help...

  1. #1

    Question Husband wants formula supplement so he can help...

    I am a new mom, so breastfeeding is also new to me - and my entire family (none of the women breastfed). My daughter will be 5 weeks on Friday and I have been only breastfeeding since she was born. My husband wants us to begin supplementing formula so he can help feed her at night and other people (grandparents) will be able to help take care of her for several hours since we do not have a breast pump yet.

    He works with nurses and, as mothers, they suggest to go ahead and begin supplementing because the main time for breastfeeding is the first month to get the antibodies and immunities.

    Since I don't know much about this, I am looking for some advice or information. Do you all agree or disagree?
    I'm worried about feeling guilty if I don't continue to breastfeed as her only nutrition. :-/

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Posts
    6,562

    Default Re: Husband wants formula supplement so he can help...

    Congratulations on your baby and

    Wow. That is some bad information your husband is getting from nurses. If you supplement with formula, you will lose your supply.

    If you want other people to be able to feed the baby, you should get a breast pump and pump the milk. Breastfeeding is supply and demand and when you feed the baby formula, you are telling your body not to make that milk. So now your baby can't get enough milk tomorrow at the same time that you gave her formula. And then it snowballs into giving more formula and more formula and then you stop breastfeeding all together.
    Tracie

    Mommy to
    Lilah 10/08 nursed 25 months
    Beatrix 01/11 nursed 30 months

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    Posts
    1,056

    Default Re: Husband wants formula supplement so he can help...

    I disagree. I don't think you are going to find anyone on this board that doesn't disagree.

    Other ways your husband can "help":
    - Change diapers
    - Empty the diaper pail
    - Wash/dry/fold/put away clothes
    - Cook
    - Clean the kitchen
    - Feed you

    There are sooooo many parts to taking care of a family that have nothing to do with feeding. And as far as babysitting goes? You can get a cheap hand pump for the occasional night out when it gets to that.
    Little SW, Aug '09
    Miss MW, Jan '11
    Sir RW, Oct '12
    3 kids in 38 mos

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
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    2,627

    Default Re: Husband wants formula supplement so he can help...

    Yeah, please don't give your baby formula if breastfeeding is going well and you don't need to!! If if supplement with formula you'll be decreasing your milk supply since milk production is supply-demand. I wouldn't even recommend pumping so he can give your baby milk in a bottle, it's too much work and not worth it.

    He can help in a number of ways with the baby. My husband took over bath time when our baby was pretty little and he dresses her in the mornings. Before you know it, your child will be eating solids but until then your husband can help change diapers, clean up around the house, cook for you, wash dishes, fill the car with gas, run errands, give you a back rub, fold laundry or a million other things that need to be done!!
    Nursed my sweet daughter 3 years, 3 mos.

  5. #5

    Default Re: Husband wants formula supplement so he can help...

    Congratulations! with all of the other posters. Also, I understand where you are coming from when you write that no one in your family breastfed. You will get good breastfeeding info. on these forums, it has helped me a lot! I hope everything goes well.
    ~Tiffany~

    Truly blessed by God
    Wife to Will
    First Time Mom to C 2/18/11
    Made it 6 Mos. EBF Now enjoying BLS
    My baby is a year old now!

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Posts
    8,272

    Default Re: Husband wants formula supplement so he can help...

    Another person who will disagree. There are SO many ways that daddy and other family can help with either the baby or with you. You've gotten LOTS of great ideas so far.

    PLUS - when baby starts solids there will be plenty of opportunities for daddy (and others) to get involved with feeding.
    Lynn
    DS1: bf 7/2006 -> 4/2009; multiple food allergies
    DS2: bf 9/2009 -> ???
    ; multiple food allergies
    Breastmilk Donor - http://hmbana.org/index/donatemilk
    Click HERE to learn about baby led solids (BLS) / baby led weaning (BLW)

  7. #7

    Default Re: Husband wants formula supplement so he can help...

    Thanks for the advice! I think I left some out... I will not stop breastfeeding completely. We would only do the formula sometimes.
    He has also been told it is unhealthy for me because I am getting no more than 4 solid hours of sleep at a time. Will the sleep time get better?

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Location
    Northern BC, Canada
    Posts
    433

    Default Re: Husband wants formula supplement so he can help...

    Get your hubby to read this...
    http://www.naba-breastfeeding.org/im...e%20Bottle.pdf

    Just something to think about.

    You could also learn how to hand express for those occasional bottles. And if anyone says anything about the price of a pump, its still a whole lot cheaper then formula. But hand expression is super handy to know anyways
    July 30, 2010-6lbs 2oz- 41w 4d (emergency c-section.) Known dairy, eggs, dogs and cats allergies, eczema, and asthma
    Bonus June 22, 2006 (is 50/50 Custody ) (born 32w) Sensitive to changing temps.
    We BF, BW, Co-sleep and use cloth diapers/pull-ups!

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
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    Default Re: Husband wants formula supplement so he can help...

    I'm not trying to be a doomsayer here, and I'm also trying not to scare you off, but I think that's how the formula starts. As a sometimes thing. Why can't you get a breastpump?

    What do YOU think about all this information that he's getting? I went almost two years getting sleep in no more than 3 hour blocks of time. The way I did it was by cosleeping. I honestly don't even know how much time is in between my 4 month olds feedings at night because I have bad eyes and can't see the clock from my bed. She wakes up, I nurse her, sometimes I put her in the bassinet if she's kicking me too much, sometimes she just sleeps next to me.

    Personally, if my DH were coming home telling me this kind of stuff, I would say "Thanks, I'm glad you're concerned for me. But you can help me by making dinner and helping clean up around the house, giving the baby a bath, that sort of thing so I can take a nap with the baby during the day and not worry about it."

    It sounds like these women that are giving your husband advice are from a different generation.
    Tracie

    Mommy to
    Lilah 10/08 nursed 25 months
    Beatrix 01/11 nursed 30 months

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    Maryland
    Posts
    2,552

    Default Re: Husband wants formula supplement so he can help...

    As far as getting more than 4 hours of sleep, it's nice to get more than that at once, but I have a very refluxy, needy 18 month old, and although sleep has gotten better, sleeping shorter stretches hasn't killed me. In fact I have been working full time and going to school part time, and managing just fine. Women have been doing this for generations and I think we are made to do this. When mothers sleep with their babies their sleep cycles sync up.

    And I agree with PPs that there are so many better ways to help! Diapers, baths, burping, soothing, etc.
    Beth

    Exclusively pumped for Lance Oct 07
    Nursed until just before he turned 3 Levi Oct 09

    Do you have extra milk? Consider donating!
    http://www.hmbana.org/:

    "So I was welcomed by the consolations of human milk; but it was not my mother or my nurses who made any decision to fill their breasts, but you who through them gave me infant food, in accordance with your ordinance and the riches which are distributed deep in the natural order." -St Augustine

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