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Thread: boredom nursing

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Oct 2010
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    177

    Default boredom nursing

    For example, the other day we were in the waiting room at the cardiologist (to check out what turned out to be a completely innocent heart murmur) The room was very small and it was crowded. There were two adult men and one teenage boy there. I was not comfortable nursing. There was no way to do it discreetly. There was only one open chair and it was right next to the teenage boy. I ended up walking DS back and forth, back and forth like I did when he was a baby. Trouble is, he is now 30 pounds! And we were waiting there 45 minutes! I totally think the reason he wanted to nurse was boredom. And he has not learned any manners yet. He pulls up my shirt and cries. I heard somebody mention in another thread about boredom/attention nursing. What can you do about it? And how to begin teaching manners at 18 1/2 months?
    Working mom to

    Gabbie 3/8/02 BF 15 months

    Rose 6/5/04 BF 18 months

    Will 10/6/09 BF 22 months and counting

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Location
    Northern Cal.
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    4,984

    Default Re: boredom nursing

    Well, first off, a situation like that is going to be rough no matter what you do. There's just only so much you can expect of a toddler, and staying still in a boring waiting room for 45 minutes is beyond the abilities of most children.

    That said, here are some things I've done to address Joe's nursing manners:

    - I taught him the sign for "milk." He has a speech delay, so teaching a word is fine too. Then every time you get the shirt grab, you encourage the baby to sign or say it instead of grabbing. It takes a while, but slowly but surely, they pick it up.

    - Distract with food (or a drink). If you think the baby is actually hungry, offer food. Ditto for a drink of something when he's thirsty.

    - Teach delayed gratification. You can do this in non-nursing ways (this is a trick I got from Harvey Karp's Happiest Toddler on the Block) - Say, "would you like your toy/cookie/etc." then say "wait just a moment" and turn away. After a brief moment, give them what they want. Then slowly extend the time in the moment. It seems contrived, but I just think of it like a fun game, you know? Over time, your baby will understand that when you say, "we'll nurse in a moment" you MEAN it, you will nurse, in a moment.

    - Distract with fun activities. Waiting rooms have got to be the worst for this. But in other situations, it's easy.

    - Sometimes, you may just need to say "No, not right now." and deal with a mini-melt-down. If you're busy deep frying something, or whatever, you CAN'T nurse. In my opinion, it is fair to say, "No, not right now."

    Good luck!! I've managed to cut Joe's boredom nursing back quite a bit. It took a while, and I'm sure it was partly his own increasing sense of reason and understanding as well as what I was doing, you know? He now "gets it" when I say "just a minute" in a way he did not at 18 months.


    You can call me JoMo!

    Mom to baby boy Joe, born 5/4/09 and breastfed for more than two and a half years, and baby girl Maggie, born 7/9/12.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Oct 2010
    Posts
    177

    Default Re: boredom nursing

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*joe.s.mom View Post
    If you're busy deep frying something, or whatever, you CAN'T nurse. In my opinion, it is fair to say, "No, not right now."
    Ha ha!! Thanks for the tips and the BTDT. I have been trying to teach him to say "num num" for a while now (This is what my DD#2 called it and I guess it stuck with me) but so far nothing. I guess he is young yet. I will persist and hope he starts to understand "wait a minute" better with age.
    Working mom to

    Gabbie 3/8/02 BF 15 months

    Rose 6/5/04 BF 18 months

    Will 10/6/09 BF 22 months and counting

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Location
    Northern Cal.
    Posts
    4,984

    Default Re: boredom nursing

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*wvmom View Post
    Ha ha!! Thanks for the tips and the BTDT. I have been trying to teach him to say "num num" for a while now (This is what my DD#2 called it and I guess it stuck with me) but so far nothing. I guess he is young yet. I will persist and hope he starts to understand "wait a minute" better with age.
    Well, as you may know if you've been here a while, Joe is speech delayed, so I've just learned that teaching him signs works better and is more effective for him as a communication tool. Depending on your baby's personality, they may learn to say a word quicker or sign it.

    Meanwhile, "Sorry, honey, not right now, I'm making chicken wings!"


    You can call me JoMo!

    Mom to baby boy Joe, born 5/4/09 and breastfed for more than two and a half years, and baby girl Maggie, born 7/9/12.

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