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Thread: Second Time and Worried About "Normal" Pain

  1. #1

    Default Second Time and Worried About "Normal" Pain

    I'm in my third trimester with baby number two. Four years ago when I had my first child I breastfed, and it was agonizing for two months. She would start her hungry cry and then I would start crying because I knew she was about to start nursing and that it was going to hurt so bad. Nothing was ever cracked or bleeding, I do remember some blisters, but mostly I just remember piercing hyper sensitive pain. I stuck it out and she breastfed for 10 months. Now that I'm pregnant again, I am so happy except when I remember those first months of nursing, and it makes me feel like a coward. I still want to do it, but I'll be working this time around, and I'll have a four year old watching me, and I don't know how that's going to work if I'm in obvious pain. At the time my Mom told me the nursing problem was normal and that my nipples would toughen up. I've done some internet searches and some places say it's normal to have pain and some say that means you're nursing wrong. I'll breastfeed either way, but I want to know if it really is normal, or if there is something I can do to avoid it this time around.

  2. #2
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    May 2006
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    Default Re: Second Time and Worried About "Normal" Pain

    Welcome, and congrats on the baby to come! Piercing pain lasting for months and months doesn't sound normal to me. I'm willing to bet that there was some issue that never got found/fixed- a tongue tie, thrush, a wicked bad latch, short or inverted nipples. Something.

    The good news is that the second go-round can be completely different from the first. My first nursing experience was agonizing for around 6 months. My second was easy-peasy. Different baby, different mouth, slightly more everted nipples. She's been a dream to nurse!

    One thing I'd strongly suggest doing is finding a lactation consultant, preferably an IBCLC, to help you if you do run into trouble. Just having that number in your phonebook will make you feel like you have a plan. Just in case.
    Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
    Coolest thing my little girl sang recently: "I love dat one-two pupples!"

  3. #3
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    May 2010
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    Default Re: Second Time and Worried About "Normal" Pain

    LLL meetings are a great place for expectant moms, too. You can get some support lined up before.

    Congrats on your new little one!

    Christine
    Baby Girl Born 2/17/10 to her two mommies
    BF from day one. I looked up one day and realized I'm nursing a toddler!

  4. #4
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    Jan 2008
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    Default Re: Second Time and Worried About "Normal" Pain

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*mommal View Post
    Welcome, and congrats on the baby to come! Piercing pain lasting for months and months doesn't sound normal to me. I'm willing to bet that there was some issue that never got found/fixed- a tongue tie, thrush, a wicked bad latch, short or inverted nipples. Something.

    The good news is that the second go-round can be completely different from the first. My first nursing experience was agonizing for around 6 months. My second was easy-peasy. Different baby, different mouth, slightly more everted nipples. She's been a dream to nurse!

    One thing I'd strongly suggest doing is finding a lactation consultant, preferably an IBCLC, to help you if you do run into trouble. Just having that number in your phonebook will make you feel like you have a plan. Just in case.
    Great advice. I also thought possible thrush. But, like momma1 said, this baby WILL be a different baby and you will have a different nursing experience. I would say, inform yourself ahead of time (not sure if you did with your first) about nursing a newborn (The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding is awesome). And, stick around here, great knowledgeable women are here to help if you hit a speed bump, we will help you through it. Also kellymom . com is an excellent resource for troubleshooting


    Jeanne (my middle name IRL)


    Mommy to two girls (M & M), born Sept. '07 and Sept. '09

  5. #5
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    Default Re: Second Time and Worried About "Normal" Pain

    my second baby was easier to nurse than the first. I think knowing what to expect and having actually held an infant to my breast to feed made a huge difference.
    Proud mom of 2 boys, both weaned gradually and with love.


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    Murray Straus, Ph.D.

  6. #6

    Default Re: Second Time and Worried About "Normal" Pain

    Thanks for the input! I've been privately worried about this for weeks, and I didn't know who to talk to. I remembered hearing about la leche league on the news, but I didn't realize what a large and supportive online community you all have. I'll try not to worry so much, and hopefully this time will be better.

    Um, I was a little worried about joining a local la leche group because I don't think I did such a great job first time around breast feeding, and I'm not sure it will be any better this time. I work in a fast passed coffee industry and most days I don't have time or coverage for my fifteen minute breaks. Once I went back to work with my first baby, I couldn't keep up supply and had to start supplementing with formula. She weaned herself off the breast completely at ten months, probably because of supply issues. I'm afraid it won't go much better this time. I still want to try, and I'll breastfeed as long as I can, but I've read these posts about amazing Moms who pump through work and nurse their kids past one and beyond, and I'm not sure I'll fit in with that.

  7. #7
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    Default Re: Second Time and Worried About "Normal" Pain

    I can tell you that when nursing my first, the pain was horrible for at least the first 2 months - but the cause was somewhat known (cracked/bleeding/inverted etc nipples). The second time around that pain is still there but knowing what to expect makes it a bit more bearable. What I've learned recently is that pain w/out an obvious cause may be thrush, or vasospasm.. both of which require some specialized treatment. I'd say to keep posting specific symptoms here and keep asking for help. Hopefully you'll end up with some answers this time!

  8. #8
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    Default Re: Second Time and Worried About "Normal" Pain

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*coffeemaestro View Post
    Um, I was a little worried about joining a local la leche group because I don't think I did such a great job first time around breast feeding, and I'm not sure it will be any better this time.
    You nursed for 10 months!!! So many moms don't even make it past a few weeks. You have so much to be proud of.

    but I've read these posts about amazing Moms who pump through work and nurse their kids past one and beyond, and I'm not sure I'll fit in with that.
    The great thing about LLL is that there's room for everyone. Moms who nurse their kids until they're toddlers, moms who nurse for only a few weeks, stay-at-home moms and moms who work outside the home, moms who struggle with supply, moms who need to use formula, moms who choose to use formula, moms who need to wean... We're here to help women achieve their nursing goals, whatever those goals may be. Don't worry about "fitting in" here! Just take what works for you, and leave the rest.
    Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
    Coolest thing my little girl sang recently: "I love dat one-two pupples!"

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
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    Default Re: Second Time and Worried About "Normal" Pain

    I wouldn't worry about fitting in. I'm sure you did the best you could. You said yourself that you nursed all that time through horrible pain. That's definitely not easy. Like the previous posts said, maybe it will be easier for you this time or you will have more support if you do run into problems. Not everyone here only feeds BM or nurses past a year..some don't intend to at the beginning and then end up deciding to. Everyone has a different situation. No one is here to judge.

  10. #10
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    Apr 2011
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    Default Re: Second Time and Worried About "Normal" Pain

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*coffeemaestro View Post
    T I work in a fast passed coffee industry and most days I don't have time or coverage for my fifteen minute breaks. Once I went back to work with my first baby, I couldn't keep up supply and had to start supplementing with formula. She weaned herself off the breast completely at ten months, probably because of supply issues. I'm afraid it won't go much better this time. .
    I think it is always important to set some goals before you go back to work. That way you can find way of working around obstacles rather than being stopped by them.

    Ive pumped with my older son and I am even nervous about making it work this time. I have spoken with my boss/coworkers about where I can pump, putting up a sign so no one busts in if there is no lock on the door. If its about having enough time you can speak with them about that too. If you are reasonable I am sure they will be too... talking to them about it early helps.

    If you want to pump at work you can get pumping sessions done in under 15 min, including clean up! If you dont get extra time to eat then you could get a hands free bra so you can eat and pump at the same time.

    I just got a hands free bra and a car adaptor for my pump so I can get in extra pumping during me commute.

    Be creative Your goals are important, they shouldn't be anyone else's goals! I nursed my other son 9 months, my goal with my lo now is to go past a year and let him wean himself.
    Last edited by @llli*mtmama; April 27th, 2011 at 07:30 PM.

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