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Thread: Other people feeding your child

  1. #11
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Location
    Northern BC, Canada
    Posts
    433

    Default Re: Other people feeding your child

    I'm with you mama waving my rolling pin. My dad did this all the time, then one time he gave my LO a piece of my mom's hawiian (pineapple) birthday cake. She puffed out immediately and we had to rush her to the hospital. Mom and Dad listen to me now when I tell them not to give my baby food.

    I have to say though, my dad spent the whole time in his room crying while we we at the hospital. He never cries. It broke my heart but now he listens.
    July 30, 2010-6lbs 2oz- 41w 4d (emergency c-section.) Known dairy, eggs, dogs and cats allergies, eczema, and asthma
    Bonus June 22, 2006 (is 50/50 Custody ) (born 32w) Sensitive to changing temps.
    We BF, BW, Co-sleep and use cloth diapers/pull-ups!

  2. #12
    Join Date
    May 2009
    Location
    Where they keep it weird
    Posts
    1,182

    Default Re: Other people feeding your child

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*mommal View Post
    Maybe one way to deal with it is to say- loudly- "Oh, don't take Grandpa's cake/soda. Let me get you your own piece/cup." And then look at Grandpa (or whomever) and say "I don't want her learning to take things off other people's plates. It's not good manners for a toddler!" That way it's about you teaching your daughter a lesson, not about you telling the adult how to behave.
    I like this idea. This covers a lot of bases!
    Some people think food equals love and they just want to make the child happy, iykwim. Unfortunatley they think that sweets and junk are the only way to get there.
    I am Lea (middle name)
    Mama to Dominic born on 3/23/09
    Wife to G 4/27/07
    We're blessed to have been for 3 years and counting! Proud to with our squirmy worm

    "My home is not a place, it is people."
    -Lois McMaster Bujold

  3. #13
    Join Date
    Feb 2010
    Posts
    44

    Default Re: Other people feeding your child

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*momtodom09 View Post
    I like this idea. This covers a lot of bases!
    Some people think food equals love and they just want to make the child happy, iykwim. Unfortunatley they think that sweets and junk are the only way to get there.
    I second that too! That's fabulous!!!
    Nursing my bug for almost 3 years YIKES!

  4. #14
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Location
    New England
    Posts
    87

    Default Re: Other people feeding your child

    Ugh that drives me nuts! My MIL is the worst. I'll never forget when she ordered sugar free coffee ice cream for my then (lactose intolerant) ten month old. I sometimes tell people that a food (like sugar) hurts his belly and he won't be able to sleep and that helps, or that it makes him hyper. My MIL gave my 2 year old an organic lollipop and thought it was ok because it was organic. Anyway, with my MIL we've had to tell her very specifically what is not ok/dangerous for him to have. I include processed foods as dangerous. I will also tell people that we haven't introduced a particular food so we don't know if he's allergic. Most of our family has learned not to feed him without checking with us.

  5. #15
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Posts
    652

    Default Re: Other people feeding your child

    oooo this really bugs me. Mil is the worst offender, sometimes even after I say no she still (!) gives whatever it is to ds, saying he really wants it. Or when I say no she looks at him and says oh honey I am so sorry I would love to give you some but your mama says no, so sad. Ugh. Luckily my dh will usually step in and say something like yeah because moomy doesn't want you to get sick or mommy wants you to be able to sleep (if he has sugar he seems to struggle falling asleep).

    My own sister is the second worst, she feeds her 12 month old dd crap all the time so some how assumes if her dd can eat it then so can my ds. Um no. She always says something about I am too restrictive or whatever, I just tell her too bad and I don't care what she thinks.

    I don't understand why people want to feed someone elses tiny child something unhealthy. I have gotten to where I don't care about the looks I get when I say no. I want my baby to have healthy eating habits and those start now.
    Ds 9/09 nursed for 20 months

    Dd 12/11 nursing a toddler again

  6. #16
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Location
    Landof2toddlers, Oregon
    Posts
    3,113

    Default Re: Other people feeding your child

    I think it is really disrespectful to you to ignore your wishes. And I think it is important to be clear about your boundaries. And I think it is much better practice for people ALWAYS to ask before giving children food.

    But, it may be time to take a deep breath and let go (unless there are allergies). You say this happens infrequently (you see these people infrequently) at parties etc. It will not kill a two yer old to eat some crud at a party (if your baby was almost one I would be more upset). You can limit amounts (my kids are pretty good at just saying no when they have had enough though, no matter what the food).

    If you really think it is a fight you want to have, then the nicest way (and therefore most likely to meet with success) is what Mommal said.

    ETA: I agree no diet soda or anything else with aspartame in.
    proud but exhausted working mammy to two high needs babies

    • my surprise baby: the one and only D-Man born 3 weeks late (5/5/08) at 9 lbs 14 oz and 21.5 inches, and
    • the shock H-Girl born about a week late (10/7/09) at 8lbs 15oz and 20.75 inches.


    If I am here I am covered in baby (probably two) and fighting for control of the keyboard.

    Family beds are awesome

    Wondering if you have PPD? Take the screening and see your doctor. You deserve to feel better.

  7. #17
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
    Location
    Texas
    Posts
    818

    Default Re: Other people feeding your child

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*nsm View Post
    oooo this really bugs me. Mil is the worst offender, sometimes even after I say no she still (!) gives whatever it is to ds, saying he really wants it. Or when I say no she looks at him and says oh honey I am so sorry I would love to give you some but your mama says no, so sad. Ugh. Luckily my dh will usually step in and say something like yeah because moomy doesn't want you to get sick or mommy wants you to be able to sleep (if he has sugar he seems to struggle falling asleep).

    My own sister is the second worst, she feeds her 12 month old dd crap all the time so some how assumes if her dd can eat it then so can my ds. Um no. She always says something about I am too restrictive or whatever, I just tell her too bad and I don't care what she thinks.

    I don't understand why people want to feed someone elses tiny child something unhealthy. I have gotten to where I don't care about the looks I get when I say no. I want my baby to have healthy eating habits and those start now.
    sounds exactly like my mil and sil. i tell them while im still in control i want to feed her healthy stuff, b/c i know when shes older she'll probably be picky and only want chicken nuggets and then they can go to town. mil's replys is "sil's kids grew up on mostly chicken nuggets and they turned out fine" i also want to know what is the big deal with feeding other peoples kids food. i have no desire to do this either, i dont see a small kid and want to give it treats. their dogs, maybe
    Christine
    Can't believe I've been and a full-time SAHM to Elena (5/2010) for over 2 yrs!
    Mami de mi preciosa Elenita
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