enough biting help please!
ok so for the last month my son who is now almost 17m old has been biting me, and everything else including grandma, the dog and tables etc, and i don't want to quit nursing cold turkey he is having a hard time from me just putting him off a bit because i don't want to be bitten the last week has been the worst.:
we had a rough start to nursing so after it clicked i set my goal at 6m then it went to 9m,12, now we are almost to 18m and i had wanted to go for 2y but i am not sure what to do! i love providing this to him but we have to figure this out when we nurse he usually bites at the end and i gently press his head into me until he lets go, and i have said ouch no biting, don't bite mommy that hurts, and i have even yelled a once because well it hurt he made me bleed.
i am so concerned i don't believe in spanking and i just got the book 123 magic for managing difficult behavior 2-12, as far as i know it has to do with time out's but i haven't read it yet i am only on chap5 !
but can i really put a 17m old in time out???
he has also been screaming a lot too @ home, store,restaurant, family homes
and just completely not listening to me at all like: please leave the blinds alone : he just gets more happy and exited and then seems to think its a game .
the newest thing is getting car sick on trips from 5-20miles is the most we have gone,it has been 3 x in the last week and now i am afraid of going anywhere. i could go on and on lol i love my son more than anything and i just want to raise him with respect, love and kindness.
i thank you for any advice and please let me know if you have any questions .
Re: enough biting help please!
Are you sure he isn't getting in his molars? I've found that DS bites a lot when he is teething. Lately it has been worse and he is getting in three molars. Once I give relief for the teething pain, that usually ends it. But, sometimes when he bites due to teething, he finds it funny and continues. For him, being sat down (basically a form of time-out) works wonders. I tell him he is not being nice and ask him to apologize. Just find out what works for your LO. It's all trial and error.
I think every kid goes through a stage of biting that has nothing at all to do with teething. How you handle it is personal and needs to be something that works with your LO so he understands he cannot do it. With DD, she did get punished with time-out. After numerous times, she knew biting was absolutely unacceptable. The time-outs worked wonders for her.
And as far as the screaming and not listening to you, sorry to tell you this, but welcome to the world of a toddler. He's so young and inquisitive. His fun games of playing with the blinds are too fun to quit until something better gets his attention. And I'd like to put him against my DS for the screaming! I swear my DS screams better than any girl and just laughs and laughs after he does it.
As far as car sickness, I'm sorry. It really is a bear for him. I still get car sick if I don't ride up front and it is the most horrible nausea I've ever had. Mine beats all the morning sickness I've had with two pregnancies. Your poor boy. I don't know how old you have to be to use dramamine or other things. Talk to your doctor. You may want to look into that or other ways to help him cope with the motion sickness. I think DD has developed it also. I feel so bad for her and I am looking into options to give her relief on our trips.
My DS is completely different from my DD. I grew up with three brothers, so I have an advantage in handling DS. I kindof know their make-up already. Boys will be boys, and they will be so very rambuctious. When DS is getting into a difficult phase of the day, it is usually because he is bored. I'll take him into wrestle on the bed (he absolutely loves to be tossed around on it!) or for another walk in the neighborhood or out back to play again. If I keep his energy curtailed a little throughout the entire day, he is easier to handle.
Hang in there, and don't worry. He is normal, and he is a toddler!! As far as the book you are reading, IDK, but at his age I don't think he can be "difficult" yet. (Just wait, that stage will come in a few months. :rolleyes:) He's just learning all he can learn in the hours he is awake.
Just stick to your guns on your rules that you enforce, and pick and choose your battles.
Re: enough biting help please!
:hug:hug Oh, boy, I have been there....in fact, we only recently emerged from that dark place, and it wasn't because of anything we did. The craziness just passed. Sometimes it's like that.
I agree that teeth can play a major role in what you described -- I would also consider having his ears checked, given the recent arrival of car sickness, as infected ears can also lead to a great deal of what you have described.
Most of all, however, I just send you mama :hug:hug because it is really hard to remember, when you have high hopes for raising a compassionate and sensitive human being, that your toddler is ever going to display anything approximating those things. I try to remind myself that the best way to learn compassion and sensitivity is to be familiar -- to really understand -- the breadth of human emotions. And boy, oh boy, are toddlers ever experiencing the whole range! When we let them have their feelings, but make clear (even when they can't remember it ten seconds later) what is acceptable behavior, I believe we set the stage for life long compassion and emotional well being. Hang in there...:gvibes
Re: enough biting help please!
thank you so much for all the encourment i really appreciate it i have given it some thought and i am going to try crakers befor we go in the car, and i am taken him to the dr. tomorrow 1st because of the possible ear infection, and when were out side last week he ate dirt, ok so i know boy's will will be boys but gross lol , and then agian this weekend so to be safe i would like to also check the possibleity of pin worms i haven't seen any but with all the upset he has been through i want to be safe.
we had a terrible night last night we where up till 2:30am and he was crying / screaming until i thought he was going to vomit, he was biting me over and over agian and couln't nurse him so for the firsst time since he was born i skip a whole day of nursing :( it was so sad " don't worrie he didn't starve he is 17m and had pleanty to eat and drink "
but just not me i tried pumoing but he didn't care for that much then finally he feel asleep and and after a breif wake up a few hours later we had our first nursing session with no biting, i almost cried i was so grateful.