Yesterday, 07:40 PM
Mommal's detailed and specific suggestions are all wonderful, and I don't have anything to add in that respect-- other than to echo that I hope you'll seek out some additional in-person help to help with the latch, and perform other informative assessments. If an IBCLC is pricey and not covered by insurance, some WIC programs have IBCLCs on staff, if you are in the US. In your post you say, "I don't want to go to LC again as I don't feel like she'll be able to help anymore," and that may be the case; but that doesn't mean that there isn't a breastfeeding helper or professional that will be able to!
You are not inadequate, mama. You are exactly the mother that your baby needs, and it is clear from the description that you provide that you are doing everything within your power to figure this out, provide the best for your baby, to nourish and protect your baby. It is okay to care about this, and it is okay to feel however you are feeling, too, but I hope you will be able to see the hard, hard, hard work that you are doing. Also, half a day is no small amount!-- that is half of what she's being nourished on! That is hugely significant, and hard won.
You deserve support and encouragement and I'm glad that you're reaching out. I hope you have people around you in real life that are being supportive and encouraging (and doing a whole lot of housework and making you meals and all of that) too.