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  • @llli*chkymnky31's Avatar
    Today, 10:34 AM
    To give some background, my now 3.5 month old baby boy was 37+4, briefly in NICU on oxygen and had a feeding tube x 2-3 days. My milk took 5 days to come in (c-section) so I pumped and he got colostrum via tube/bottle and was briefly supplemented with formula until his discharge at day 5, when I was able to produce enough. He was also jaundiced and a lazy feeder. I would nurse, then have to pump and supplement with EBM via bottle because he would get frustrated and not empty my breasts/had a shallow latch. When I returned to work about 6 weeks ago, he quickly developed a bottle preference (using Munchkin latch slowest flow). Even when drowsy, he gets upset at the mere presence of my nipple and screams till he gets a bottle. I can get him to briefly, lazily latch maybe once a week, but he rarely sucks long enough for letdown to occur and oddly, will often unlatch when it does occur, like he can't stand the taste of it. Regardless, I dutifully pump and so far, produce between 24-28 oz/day. He generally takes it all. Occasionally, during growth spurts, I have to pull a bag of frozen milk from the freezer, reducing my limited stash. I have not had to supplement with formula so far, but I would desperately like him to just nurse. I'm depressed about this. I miss the bonding. I hate my pump and while I could probably do this until he hits 6 months (if my supply allows), I can't see myself attached to the pump for longer. My daughter (now 2y), destroyed my nipples as a newborn and...
    0 replies | 1 view(s)
  • @llli*maddieb's Avatar
    Today, 10:05 AM
    I agree with mommal, those are good ideas! I also think that if you offer and baby is not going for it, just offering again a little later is fine.
    4 replies | 195 view(s)
  • @llli*maddieb's Avatar
    Today, 10:02 AM
    :ita Man, what is going ON with doctors these days! Seriously. Dr. Sears has a pretty good article about reflux: http://www.askdrsears.com/topics/health-concerns/childhood-illnesses/ger/ger-what-it-what-do-faqs "reflux" is a very iffy diagnoses in the first place. In other words, it is way over diagnosed. Also, reflux is certainly not the only possible cause of congestion! Have you considered if there may be environmental allergens at play, possibly? I also agree that overproduction and fast letdown might be involved. 4 months (or really, anytime after 3 months) is a notorious time for some very odd nursing behavior. In the book The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding the authors call this phenomenon "the four month fussies."
    4 replies | 173 view(s)
  • @llli*maddieb's Avatar
    Today, 09:40 AM
    I agree, you can certainly wean your two-three year old before baby. Anyone can wean any child at any age, it is simply the process and "ease" that differs situation to situation. There is no such thing as "can't" wean. But the process can be longer or shorter or more or less unpleasant depending on a number of factors. One reason weaning can seem to not be happening is because something is holding mom back from being firm and consistent. A common reason is that mom is actually not ready to fully wean herself, in which case of course there is no reason to wean (unless it is medically required.) A mom can dislike some, or even most things about nursing, but find it helps her enough in some areas that she is not really ready to stop. I imagine a balance scale, with the benefits of nursing on one side and the benefits of weaning on the other, and until the scale tips clearly to weaning, mom can feel reluctant and weaning stalls. Once the scales have tipped well to weaning for mom, what might still hold her back from the weaning process is exhaustion, (probably the most common issue- weaning takes effort, and many moms with young kids do not have a ton of extra energy lying around to make that effort.) Other barriers might be reluctance to be firm or "guilt." For reasons I am still trying to understand, I have observed (and experienced myself) that moms tend to feel enormous guilt when holding one child to a different set of behavioral expectations than another, especially...
    22 replies | 7878 view(s)
  • @llli*justice222's Avatar
    Today, 09:38 AM
    We discovered a few weeks ago at 7 weeks old that my son had a tongue and lip tie and was not gaining weight. Unfortunately he is still not nursing effectively after getting those clipped, so I am borrowing a hospital grade pump and giving him 3 oz every 2-3 hours to get his weight up to where it should be, and also nursing him between bottles. I'm having a hard time keeping up with pumping because he doesnt stay entertained for very long without me holding him, and though I can pump one side while he nurses on the other, I get less milk and it takes longer because I'm leaning backwards in my glider to make room for the pump over him (plus it always leaks out the bottom of the pump shield). I'm afraid that my supply is continuing to decrease because I can't pump often enough or fully finish each pump session. When my milk first came in I leaked constantly and he gained weight probably only getting what was leaking or milk during let downs, but then I guess because he wasn't actually emptying the breast (wish I had a pump back then!) my supply decreased and he stopped getting enough which is when he stopped gaining weight. I currently pump just enough to stay ahead of him but I'm worried I'll fall behind. How do you keep your baby entertained while you pump?
    0 replies | 9 view(s)
  • @llli*raychulltek's Avatar
    Today, 08:39 AM
    Hello All-- I'm new here so a little background info... I am a first time mom. I became pregnant in Aug 2015 and was diagnosed with incompetent cervix in December due to a cone biopsy I had done to remove cervical cancer in 2011. I had a cerclage placed at 19 weeks and my cervical length was stable until 28 weeks when it started to shorten and then 31 weeks I funneled to the stitch. At 32 weeks my water broke and I spent a week in the hospital until giving birth to my daughter, Lulu, at 33 week2days. She was 4lbs1oz and needed to be intubated at first but was quickly extubated (45 mins later), on cpap for a day, and other than that and a touch of jaundice, she just needed to feed and grow. She spent 12 days in the NICU. After she was born, I pumped right away and supplemented at first with formula for the first 4 days until my milk was in and since then she has been on my breast milk only. We attempted breastfeeding twice a day with the help of lactation consultants in the NICU but couldn't establish a good latch. I focused mostly on bottle feeding because it seemed to be what was helping her to thrive and got her home so quickly. She's now home and at 6 weeks old weighs 7lbs2oz. She is doing so well. We've been home for a month now and a few days ago I decided to make a real go at getting her to take the breast. We've established a good latch and she has been successfully breastfeeding twice a day but I'm struggling with a few issues that I am hoping to get some advice...
    0 replies | 12 view(s)
  • @llli*mommal's Avatar
    Today, 08:08 AM
    You can definitely get the toddler weaned before weaning the baby. It just might be more difficult than if you did not have the baby there, showing the toddler what he could have if only he could convince mom to give it to him. Any chance of sending the toddler to preschool or a playgroup for a few hours per day?
    22 replies | 7878 view(s)
  • @llli*mommal's Avatar
    Today, 08:06 AM
    :eyebrow The ONLY thing you can do for reflux is an elimination diet? Did the doctor think that medication was not a good idea? Did he recommend nursing her really frequently, or having her sleep on an inclined surface, or wearing her upright in a sling as much as possible? How about nursing in reclined positions (e.g., biological nurturing)? When you have a 4 month-old who is a fussy nurser who will nurse only in the most limited positions, I think the best thing to do is to take some time and roll with that. If she wants to nurse side-lying, nurse her side-lying, even if that means that you are stuck at home a lot. The reason why I suggest this approach is that when you have a baby who is resisting nursing, it's usually (not always- you're breastfeeding a baby, not a robot!) a good idea to keep the baby at the breast as much as humanly possible. You don't want her to get the idea that easy meals can be delivered via bottle, so that she starts refusing you completely. How would you rate your milk supply at this point- do you have about the right amount, or are you producing quite a bit more than baby needs? (Signs of overproduction: frequent feelings of fullness, fast letdowns, baby coughing/gagging/pulling off the breast during letdowns, mom able to pump a lot of milk with relatively little effort)
    4 replies | 173 view(s)
  • @llli*mommal's Avatar
    Today, 07:58 AM
    That's terrific!!! "Comfort" nursing is never just for comfort. Even if the breast is totally dry, it helps to build the baby's sucking skills and assists in normal jaw development. And if there's milk, the baby will get some of it- maybe not a huge amount, depending on her nursing skill and how much milk is in the breast, but still some. Anyway, continuing to have the baby at the breast for any amount of time is a great way to maintain her ability to nurse for the future. Of course not! I have a lot of hope that things will eventually click for you, if you can just hang in there long enough. That's how things worked for me and my first, who was also born quite small (6 lbs, 7 oz) and had a lip tie that we didn't catch until she was much older (the dentist noticed it when she was 7 and her permanent teeth came in with a big gap between them).
    21 replies | 1083 view(s)
  • @llli*sef's Avatar
    Today, 05:42 AM
    I forgot to add: When he was loosing weight, he stopped pooping all together and had few wet diapers. Now, after we have introduced supplementing again, he has more wet diapers and some but few (as in one) poopy diaper. -We got a new SNS. Because we are feeding on demand and still figuring out how much supplement he needs (we were supplementing almost all his food intake even though he was still nursing. Now we are at about 10 ounces and his weight gain is very slow so we are not sure if he needs more ....). It becomes challenging to use the SNS while we are figuring it out because it's difficult to fill it one ounce at a time while he is nursing. Does that make sense? Any suggestions on this? I would like to use this more than bottle feeding (though he has no issue going back and forth, I just like the extra bonding time and time at the breast for stimulation of supply) but can't figure out how to do it ...
    20 replies | 872 view(s)
  • @llli*sef's Avatar
    Today, 05:32 AM
    So sadly, after a few days, my son started to loose weight again. We upped the supplement amount and he is slowly gaining and his disposition is back to normal (more alert, happier after feedings, etc.). I'm wondering if, as he grows, my milk supply remains the same so he is at a slightly larger deficit. I have a few questions. -I keep reading how rare it is that your body does not produce enough milk for your baby. Is breast surgery one of those "rare" occasions that contribute? -How long do people typically triple feed (nurse, supplement, pump)? I've been doing it now for 7 weeks. I'm physically and mentally exhausted but I want to do what is best for my son. -At this point, how realistic is it that my supply is established? I feel like I have exhausted all means of increasing supply. -I typically pump 6-7 times a day (sometimes more). How can I start backing off the pumping? If I do, will my supply take a hit? It makes me nervous since it seems like as the baby grows, my supply does not and I'm scared to get to the point where his demand is far greater than my supply and he stops nursing all together. -This morning our feeding and pumping got a little messed up. I ended up going about 5 hours without pumping (he nursed though). When we got up for the next feed, my breast were leaking (this has NEVER happened to me before). I was wondering ... if I stopped pumping would I actually have more for him available when he nurses (and would it stay like that)? Thanks...
    20 replies | 872 view(s)
  • @llli*briley.lutes's Avatar
    Yesterday, 09:44 PM
    Thank you! Her ped says the congestion is caused by the reflux and that the only thing I can do to help her reflux is keep doing the elimination diet. She's gaining weight fine so he didn't seem to think the difficulty I'm having nursing her was really an issue. It getss more and more difficult every day.
    4 replies | 173 view(s)
  • @llli*searsmami's Avatar
    Yesterday, 08:45 PM
    Thanks maddieb - my baby is almost 6 mos old now. It's a joy to nurse the infant, but I dread having to nurse the toddler. As mentioned, I never had an issue with "extended breastfeeding" and I figured I could tandem nurse. I used to love hearing my toddler's little pitter patter into my room in the morning, but sadly now I dread when he comes to the door because I know he's only coming in to nurse, and it often wakes the baby who is in my room. I offer cuddles, which we both appreciate, and sometimes he falls back asleep which is sweet. But in regard to tandem nursing, a few weeks into it (and nursing them separately/at different times) I had an irrepressible feeling that this wasn't for me. Unfortunately my entire body feels a sense of revulsion and I just want to scream...so I do "countdowns" and offer toddler snacks & distractions. We've been able to cut back on the bedtime nursing, and nursing in public, but ideally I think I would just like toddler weaned completely....Maybe that can't happen until the baby is no longer nursing either?
    22 replies | 7878 view(s)
  • @llli*shanghai's Avatar
    Yesterday, 12:14 PM
    @mommal thanks for your continued advice and support and just reading my posts! It's very encouraging through this time. I let my LO comfort nurse as much and as often as she likes and it's how she falls asleep. I hope that is enough. I just don't want to fool myself into thinking that she's getting adequate nutrition from my breasts and continue to let her not gain weight. I really hope that some day it will click for her. By the way she is a tiny baby. She was 6 lb 15 oz and 20 inches at birth and lowest weight was 6 lb and 1 month later she is 7 lb 14 oz and 21 inches. I am now pumping 10 times a day for about 12 mins and am getting about 1-2 ounces from both breasts each time. I have about a 4 hour break at night and after that break is when I can pump 2 oz. I also find that I get the most milk in probably the first 6-8 mins and I can't seem to get a second let down. Is there anything else I can do differently?
    21 replies | 1083 view(s)
  • @llli*mommal's Avatar
    Yesterday, 06:19 AM
    :ita with the excellent post above!
    2 replies | 111 view(s)
  • @llli*mommal's Avatar
    Yesterday, 06:14 AM
    :( Mama, I am so sorry that you are in such a rough place that you can't even watch your baby get a bottle. i know that it is very hard the first few times- I remember when I needed to give my oldest a bottle of formula, and I felt AWFUL. It felt like I had failed as a mom and a woman, all within 2 weeks of having a baby. It does get easier, I promise. Try to see the bottle as a tool that is helping you meet your breastfeeding goals and your goals as a mom. If you are going to exclusively pump, the ideal set-up is to have a hospital-grade pump. The PISA is a good pump but it is prmarily designed for the working mom who is relying on it only part of the time. If it's all you can get, that is okay! I would simply suggest looking into getting a hospital-grade machine, especially right now while you are trying to build supply. The best way to increase supply with a pump is to pump frequently and to empty the breast as much as possible when you do. Supply is created by demand, so every time you remove milk from the breast, your body gets a message to make more. This seems counterintuitive to a lot of moms- they think "Well, if I let the milk build up, there will be more to pump out". But letting the milk sit in the breast will cue the body to reduce production. So you are aiming to pump as many times as realistically possible in a 24-hour period. 8-10 or more pump sessions per day, with some taking place overnight, would be excellent. That is what I did when...
    21 replies | 1083 view(s)
  • @llli*mommal's Avatar
    Yesterday, 05:51 AM
    If you would like to nurse and baby isn't into it, there are ways to gently, subtly convince her that it might be a good idea. Like taking her into a dark, quiet bedroom where everything is very boring. Nothing to do but nurse, in that situation, right? Or sitting down in your favorite nursing chair- sometimes that can subtly cue the baby to start thinking about nursing and pretty soon she is crawling over to you...
    4 replies | 195 view(s)
  • @llli*mommal's Avatar
    Yesterday, 05:47 AM
    :ita This sounds like something that requires help from someone with specialized knowledge. If an IBCLC or LC is not available, talk to your doctor or midwife.
    4 replies | 173 view(s)
  • @llli*mommal's Avatar
    Yesterday, 05:37 AM
    Yes, your pediatrician is obviously wrong! At this point, I would be looking for a different pediatrician but I don't know that I would switch doctors if you can't find someone who is obviously better. What I look for in a pediatrician is that he/she be a good diagnostician, and know how treat disease. If my kids' doctor can do that, then I know I can just ignore their advice on things like sleep and breastfeeding. Then next time you go in, think about what YOU want to talk about, and what is of concern to YOU. Three are answers you can give that will short-circuit the conversation about breastfeeding and co-sleeping before it even has a chance to start. Of the doctor asks if the baby is breastfeeding, the answer can be "He nurses during the day." You didn't lie- you just conveniently forgot to mention that he also nurses at night. If the doctor asks where the baby sleeps, you can answer "He has a crib." You don't need to mention that he never uses it. ;)
    2 replies | 140 view(s)
  • @llli*mommal's Avatar
    Yesterday, 05:28 AM
    If you just got your period back, I think it makes sense to be very patient with your body. IIRC, the average chance of conceiving is about 30% per cycle. And if your cycle just started up again, you can kind of expect things to be a bit wonky for a few months, which probably puts the chances even lower for a while.
    5 replies | 344 view(s)
  • @llli*maddieb's Avatar
    April 29th, 2016, 11:44 PM
    Hi Sprocket. It is amazing how much progress you and baby are making! I think that whenever an IBCLC gives a mom a plan and the plan is tried, some tweaking of that plan is typically needed. After all we are talking about biological processes and human beings, not machines. It sounds like the pumping suggested is "just in case" pumping. It is not "You must pump 5 times a day or your production will tank" Or "You must pump 5 times a day because you do not make enough milk yet" but rather "If you pump 5 times a day, even if baby is not nursing super efficiently yet, we can be extra super sure that your milk production will be just fine. So do that, just in case." But the reality is that this specific plan (pumping 5 times every day but during the day only) is 1) Exhausting 2) worrying you and 3) making it harder for baby to nurse after you have pumped. Given any of those things, some tweaking of the plan would be in order. Ideally I would suggest calling your IBCLC and discussing the need for adjustments to this plan with her. She has seen you and your baby and is very familiar with the entire situation.
    2 replies | 111 view(s)
  • @llli*maddieb's Avatar
    April 29th, 2016, 09:17 PM
    Hi pthgrl. I have three kids, all of whom nursed well into their preschool years. I have weaned 2 kids and am currently nursing a child who will turn 4 this summer. I attempted nightweaning my oldest child at 17-18 months of age but gave it up after a few months of worse sleep for everyone. He was a very, very frequent waker. I have experience nightweaning that same child at an older age and also transitioning two kids from the family bed to their own beds and rooms. I also used to run a nursing toddler support group where nightweaning and sleep issues was a common topic. So that is my experience in this area. Obviously every child is very different and it is not really possible to predict reactions to night weaning. In my experience, nightweaning can be done at any age, but it is not likely to be easier to night wean at 18 months than it is now. Kids usually start putting together much longer stretches of sleep and also may become more comfortable sleeping alone at an older age- think between age 3 and 4. If there is a time that night weaning becomes generally noticeably easier, my guess is that would be a more realistic age. This does not mean your child might not be easier to night wean before that, I am speaking very generally. I also have seen nightweaning or other partial weaning attempts turn into complete weaning or nursing strikes. While I would not say this is common, it does happen sometimes. Developmentally, the second year of life is one with many,...
    1 replies | 106 view(s)
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